Why are there so many single mothers on dating sitespoint is that does not worth it, for a single childfree man, to date a single mom. while she was in prison she kept promising to sign adoption papers but never did. why would they take on such huge responsibility if they could find someone else without that responsibility? it doesn’t change the fact that most women do not want to date someone who is out of their age range by more than 5-7 years. another note i am curious judgybitch where do you stand on the single mothers who have chosen to give a better life to a child through adoption? and only god fearing good christian women are against it, right? lot of women are posting on here asking men not too be judgemental. think your views are brash and, only by today’s standards, controversial (makes for good blogging i suppose). the way i feel about her, it makes that love seem weak and pale in comparison. if so and if you want to be more respectful knock that shit off! if someone is determined to be uneducated and live off welfare, they're going to do so at any age. in both cases, they will in some ways treat that man as if he is guilty. before i met my husband, he dated a single mom with a child. are already reeling from their parents’ dysfunction, and they need that extra attention mom is giving to xyz men. now, you can get all mad and angry about it, or recognize that it is real and there. would give anything for every one of those women to have had an extra 10 to 20 years on them, yet be just like they are. you're c very black and white in your views, and this subject has a bit of gray area. by the way, even though i’m 40, i get hit on and asked out by young 20 something’s regularly…. not already obvious, i’m a single mother myself (dad is still in picture, living in another state and in college) & though we’re not together this has not affected my child’s life whatsoever. there is no indication that this woman is on government assistance. man, i guess my mom should have just aborted me so i wouldn’t have ended up so fucked up. what i am saying is that yes, in the majority of cases, it is the men who are chasing after the younger women with little bags of candy.“children of single mothers do poorly on every imaginable scale: they have more emotional problems, experience more stress, are more likely to grow up poor, they have lower educational achievements and experience way more behavioral problems than children who grow up with married parents. you are thinking of putting your precious prong into a chamber where a child has been poisoned, ripped, torn, suctioned out? people are conditioned left and right and centre from day 1 that sex is fine with someone you don’t really love or know. if you know your partner has a bad history, why would you breed with this person? would say that children of gay couples know their family is different, but it’s still a family with two parents. mothers are clearly really, really bad at making life decisions……. too many people act as if they have forever to find the right person.’s going to be a while before i try dating someone else, if i ever do. abortion is also anti man because it will always be something women who are married can do in secret and husbands will be continuously lied to all around the united states and have no idea a woman is killing a fetus that is equally his. it was not my son’s fault that his father was a disgusting pig who couldn’t control his impulses and i wasn’t going to kill him for that. so a few years did not make a difference in how i lived my life. of a small catholic school and because of her nature many of the young kids seem to go to her when they need a little help or advice. when i’m 40, i will likely be most attracted to other 40-somethings. the shit that babies are everywhere and unwanted is bull. am single mom and still managed to graduate from the university of az, with my masters. i found out from her county that she or her husband ever filled for a legal separation or divorce ( public records don’t lie ) i wish i would have thought to investigate sooner , i could have saved my self alot of b. is it that people who know the least are the ones who act like experts. marry someone with kids, you become a step father or mother. as to me looking my age, i don’t have an issue with that because i put it there for you to see so it of course informs your mind and influences. probably know that in order to have a full life (balancing family and career etc) you need to be extremely well organized, and have schedules for everything, including for example for dates two evenings per week. at least the later one kept her offspring alive and there is a lot more respect in that to me. girls tend to have self esteem issues and boys tend to have anti social issues. too many “strong” women have a problem with compromising because they are so afraid of being walked on. eventually she did get one because it was just too much to suddenly be thrust into parenthood with a girl i’d known for a few months, but it took an awful lot of tender convincing. picky women-statistically the pickiest in the country- and having unrealistic standards,even female dating coaches are frustrated. only exceptions might be widowed and widowered single parents with infants who are in need of another parent to help them raise their tiny babies. that doesn’t mean i have to like it or that i or christina should have to suppress who we attracted to because maybe, just maybe there are some guys out there that break the mould., my opinion is that a single mom or single dad, even if widowed or widowered should generally not date while their children are young and living with them. you don’t get everything you want, ever, why would you expect dating to be any different? too many seem to think a woman is just a vagina with some silicone around it. graduated hs at 17, college degree by 20 & independently supporting (in my own condo) me & my daughter (who’s incredibly bright for her age) gives me way more pride than the unhappily married couples who stay together “just because they made a kid together” and feel the need to adapt to societies expectations of a normal household all the while they’re making their kids suffer and stress over their own relationship issues. now it feels like i’ve been given a glimpse of how beautiful life is, just so that i’d know exactly how good i can feel, then kicked back into my fog so that i can have the pain of knowing what i’m missing. to each his own, as i have said i am not a single mother so i am not defending myself to your judgemental ways just having my own opinion which is clearly not welcome to close minded fools. think i’m hot but my boyfriend doesn’t seem to think so. though not impossible, she should follow evans advice to give her the best chances rather than hope that men will suddenly change and find single moms super desirable for a relationship. there are instances like rape or birth control failure that can result in unplanned pregnancies but not necessarily unwanted. shouldn’t quit because single men your age want sex and more time.’m realistic enough to realize that most 20 somethings don’t want to marry man past mid 30s, and some don’t even want a man more than a few years older than they are. i assure your opinion may in fact be the majority, but who cares. at the very least, it takes an extraordinarily strong, forgiving, and mature soul who is willing to hitch their life to a wagon already loaded down with some very heavy baggage.: 6/4/2007msg: 4why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? women over 30 are not worthless, or unattractive or whatever bs mra types want to put out. i know everest is high, but some people get up the damn thing, don’t they? then you go ahead and convince yourself they are all brilliant, caring and deeply invested in their children’s future. divorce rate is very high, so many folks date single parents. that is like urging someone to settle which no-one should do. at sometimes her son talks about his dad of which that makes me feel sad, i had introduced her to my mom but initially she didn’t like her becouse she’s got a child and my mom once asked why am i dating a women with a child while i don’t have one but according to my observation they are in good terms now . and single moms play by a different standard than married moms. mariied couple with kids isn’t a reasonable comparison at all – they’re the *couples’* kids…completely different from taking on someone else’s kids, which likely come from poor decision making (or else they’d be married with a father! only thing is , op may not find some of these men attractive, they may have other issues, and she just may prefer the occasional fun she can have with men her age. the first person that i’ve ever love, that i’ve trusted in ten years, the second in my life, someone who made me believe that they loved me and wanted me and cared about me, basically told me, “fuck you, i don’t want you in my life. what she hears alot of is mom wouldn't wake up or there nothing in the fridge or cupboard to even muster a breaky or a bag lunch. the thugs, goons, drug dealers, criminals & etc do make their vaginas wet so that's who they procreate with. most women share my preference of not wanting to date someone who looks like he could be their father, regardless of how good he looks for his age, and how good of a job he has. this:click to share on facebook (opens in new window)click to share on twitter (opens in new window)click to share on pinterest (opens in new window)click to share on pocket (opens in new window)click to email this to a friend (opens in new window)click to share on tumblr (opens in new window)click to share on reddit (opens in new window)click to share on google+ (opens in new window)moreclick to press this!, you are far from the typical single mothers out there. when i was hanging out on rory’s blog, there was a woman who was dating two guys. she basiclly home up with me because i didn’t seem to understand why she was so upset that winter night and that i was invalidating her feelings ? view of things and i think this is how many people think. point is that any man that doesn’t want his life ruined by the family court will indeed judge and stay clear of all single mothers. and if she’s on good terms with the ex it strongly suggests a “frivorce” making for way to many risks and downsides. i was married for ten years, have four beautiful boys under 9 and have a very fulfilling and successful career. hate spam as much as you do, therefore i will never sell, rent, or give away your email address. how many minutes a day do you see those “beautiful children? these women are smart and can figure out if they’re willing to date much older guys, and whether it’ll make them happy., it doesnt matter anyways, many women marry a rich, good guy then go behind his back and cheat with a guy who is good at laying pipe, or, they marry the good pipe layer and then go find themselves a sugar daddy. she has two teenage sons who are going off to college…imagine that! i’m sure that there are also single moms like the one you described that we should stay faaaar away from, but that has nothing to do with the fact they have a child, but with their disturbed characters. but when someone insists women should consider older men, i assume they mean much older, since a few years older is the norm.“that is like urging someone to settle which no-one should do. left my husband because he was verbally, emotionally and sometimes physically abusive of me.!“i fell in love” single mom leaving 3 kids behind to marry prisoner. they had to know, there is no way they didn’t! my daughter grows up to be a single mother (not widowed, single), then i have failed disastrously in my job as her parent.-to-2cjoined: 1/14/2008msg: 5why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? so instead of giving up on the whole thing – which, as you know – is incredibly shortsighted, given that you have 50 more years on this earth, how about you change focus? now, a very cute, single blond that lives on my floor was flirting with me in a major way last night. no one questions that the original intent of feminism was and is a social good. i get together with friends and other parents with children to keep everyone engaged and ensure my daughter has positive impressions at an early age. was amused to see that the recent pew research poll included without comment single moms and obese women in concluding there were only 91 marriageable men to 100 marriageable women, all in the 25 to 34 age range. or in words, you increased your chances substantially to become a single mother. right now if women are with men who are not stable it doesn't matter because the state steps in and pays for things that the man normally would pay for. people like you who claim that there is this magic recipe of finding the perfect wife by taking steps a, b and c are not grounded to reality. please beware of single mothers its not worth the risk its jsut isnt there is alot of personal experiences of men being fucked by the court systems when all they wanted was some sex and fun dont date single mothers i cant wait till some single mom here tells me not all single mons are like that haha please the moms who dont need help and have a career and money are in the few haha. stop making excuses for single moms and the decisions they make. yourself and your kids a favor – focus on showing them how you are a whole person and a whole, in tact family just the way you are. it doesnt matter if a woman has a career or not because most women are like chameleons they change based on there emotional states all the time. also don't think you're qualified to say why young women are getting pregnant and how they were sexually educated - do you?” there’s a huge difference between something being that way, and it supposed to be that way. usually agree with your advice and male perspective but this time i felt it was an over-simplification and i wanted christina to know there were people out there who were facing similar issues. it’s very uplifting and edifying to reduce human beings down to some arbitrary ratings system. not all young men will, particularly when raised by a woman (single, or if father not engaged in the household).” if my choice and ex’s choice wasnt that this is best for my son., that you love someone that treated you so bad, is a little disturbing. i also think women who think single mothers are crazy might change their mind if they got an ultrasound of their baby. wish single parents and blended families would stop trying to put a heroic happy face on their circumstances. and finally everyone can make mistakes, just for us guys a mistake of being with the wrong girl doesn’t get us pregnant and we can get rid of it easily, whereas women are disavantaged by nature as they become pregnant and abortion has a time-limit and besides it’s psychologically a very difficult step for women. back to dating now but ive got my witts about me now regarding men with kids…. remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate. why do people expect women to date and even marry men they aren’t attracted to just to get themselves married? it is claimed, and there may be something to it, that some men may in fact be simply trying to date younger women for their ego, to prove to themselves that they still have it. shouldn’t quit because single men your age want sex and more time.#2, she can put an emphasis on finding a man who also has kids…preferably one who has joint custody, or full custody. of all she is smoking, stunningly beautiful, something like sophia loren in her twenties and have had the best passionate sex and intense love experience ever in my life with this woman. most single mothers are poor, stupid and do not care about their children. is a difference between initiating contact on a dating website and chasing in real life. cared for your kid when your were in high school/college? the ones that are like this are generally not truthful. take it from a 26-year-old male who is tired of his dating pool being saturated with kids. you can never say this to anybody without having them jump down your throat and talk about “moms deserve happiness too. i’ve lived through your situation and my children are now in their 20’s. korean war and world war ii friends who fought for americas freedom and i sure as hell feel more for these heros over some horny lazy piece of trash! of that small minority, single parents need to buckle down and pour everything they’ve got into their damn kids! my mother taught me about personal responsibility, integrity and work ethic. like judgybitch wrote above – single moms are a screaming red light, for this reason. the fact is you have to understand statically what evan is saying, it’s not all of them but if she is able to make small changes to meet her dating goals that can bring great results.. i am not technically a widow but from reading this article i would be “classified” as a single, no good, money hungry, slut of a mom. grow the fuck up and don’t let some judgemental bitch tell you who you should or who you shouldn’t date. my son tried to tell me i should get married like daddy. my mother has been a single mother for the last 22 years pretty much(since she had me). i would also be interested to know the ages and how many kids these responders actually have! is an emotional topic so i expect the replies to this article to be emotional too. that really sucks guys i couldn’t even imagine being stranded like that anthony i didn’t even like being away at college in a state i didn’t know let alone to travel for some who doesn’t even have the courage to tell you the truth to your face. take care of a baby who was born with herpes. if you are 50, and a 39 year old man falls in love with you, will you tell him that it would be creepy for you to date him? problem with you saying these things is that men who want to abandon their children for selfish reasons read this and think "he's right - i'm an alpha and she should have known i would leave".“don’t sacrifice who you are because the guys you’be dated so far don’t have the maturity to handle your situation. there’s a name for doing the same thing again and again and expecting different results, it’s called insanity. the point of the article is highlight the irresponsibility of single moms in general,though few of them are sensible.: 2/4/2006msg: 18view profilehistorywhy are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? just keep dating the same types of guys she does presently, and hope that she eventually finds one that will look past her kids., i love the anger from some commenters – seems you’re hitting close to the bone on some issues! outside of that she is not needed, so donot go and fool yourself into thinking otherwise and as trac says ” dealing with us western women” dealing with anything is simply a choice . don’t sacrifice who you are because the guys you’be dated so far don’t have the maturity to handle your situation. the risks are far, far too high and the rewards are much lower. is it really this difficult to find a sweet person to share your life with and just have fun ? people who confuse being safe with giving their children permission when they will make the decision regardless of the consequences is a parent that doesn't really care about preventing the unwanted/unplanned pregnancy. think what you are saying about single moms and divorced single moms isn’t right. you appear to be one of the divorced moms she mentioned at the top of her piece — divorced without the divorce. the ones who want (more) kids at 50 are ah’s and steer clear of them. i am saying that for any man, with any woman who has a daughter, there is risk there whether he acknowledges it or not. saddens me that people look down on single mothers so frequently. but realistically, that’s what any man who has a relationship/marriage with you will be – a father figure for your kids – whether or not they already have a father, and whether or not you provide the lion’s share of the income. but i wonder…when you and your friends hit 45, maybe 50, will you think it’s creepy for an older person to date or marry a younger person? i bet the 43-year old single mom of four kids with three babydaddies at a previous job that a coworker tried to set me up with (“oh, she’s a good woman, so treat her right! at the very least, however, i have learned a lot about judging a person earlier on, who i am and what i want, and that things require effort and work and communication. i know grammar nazi’s are annoying, but if no one points out the mistakes, then they’ll never go away! are 2 main reasons as to why most single moms are single:They picked a loser to begin with. if every person didn’t go for a single mom, then women would stop looking around after dating a jerk while friendzoning the good guys. no one of us has planned to be where we are rasing child in my case a boy on our own and you say how can woman rase a man? but in todays society a single man is better off health wise staying single. i see that as the big risk in dating a single mother, or divorced mother. was going to try to keep this post somewhat positive and peaceful but this kind of negativity and discouragement to rise above hardships is just downright disrespectful. if you read her post, you can tell she doesn’t want to stop dating. was basically juggled from one poisonous parenting figure to another over my childhood, but, through no ones choice but my own, i ditched my family like a hot sack of shit. she took her son and sold him for 10 thousand dollars and took the underage girls out of state.
Get Back Into Dating for Single Moms | WealthySingleMommy withi really don’t think that is going to be an enjoyable society for anyone to live in…not really. some people are not as anal as others and have more fun. dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. also don't think you're qualified to say why young women are getting pregnant and how they were sexually educated - do you? so ive been loking down on myself for years, and living the consequances of my actions. is it really that scary for a decent guy to date someone in my position? that nasty ex bf i mentioned who showed what a horrible person he is after i refused to marry him or get back with him? says: “i left my husband because he was verbally, emotionally and sometimes physically abusive of me. and all i can think of not is that this is the mentality of someone who ends of a single mother…. them in the 1950's and they are making them now. if you doubt this how does someone with no job have a vehicle gas and mandatory insurance.: 10/24/2008msg: 16view profilehistorywhy are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? now, every person needs to go to college in order to be able to have a career..maybe that female your so in to realized even though her husband is still a jerk she still loves him and what she feels for you isn’t love…it was comfort…and blocking and pushing you away is what she needed…she needed to know somebody could love her then she needed to know she could be in control…that sucks its awful…but heartbreak and feeling abandoned can really screw you up. lol i was not disputing the reality that men are more attracted to younger women. throughout my whole life i have enjoyed building real businesses by solving real problems. i told her you rely heavily on men and people , she said god keeps me at my parents and he is punishing me ! i wanted to be the one who would leave little notes for her, dance with her, be there for her when she was sad. lastly you maybe a guy who needs to be the most important person in your girls life, and needs to be at parties every weekend with your girl and stuff like that, if so, have at it! no, she does not have the same chances that a single woman or one with 1 kids has. i loved one of the children very much- one of them would tell me whatever i did was not as good as his father did, and the other kid was just sort of there. sorry, i wish there was more specific terminology for “older within a normal range” and ” much older. children who don’t have their biological father actively involved in their lives are at dramatically higher risk of a whole host of negative outcomes. the point to my story was not all single mothers are welfare whores, and not all of them are looking for someone to provide for them and take care of them and step in as a father to a child that’s not thiers. unless you were raped - which is an exception and a tiny minority of situations - you chose to be a single mother indirectly. i am now a man who prefers, yes i said i,t prefers to date single mothers, matter of fact i’m dating one now. many single women in their 20's with kids (dating, boyfriend, married). and i am sorry, but just because a woman does not find much older man attractive, has no correlation that she is repulsed by older women. the kids shouldn’t be subjected to anyone you aren’t planning to marry – why should their little hearts be dragged through the mud?. feminists hate women because they don’t think women are capable of making their own decisions and only do what men want. for instance, most churches have bible school classes before or after the sermon that are segregated into age groups. so you can take this article and shove it up your ass. think about it, dating/relationship building takes time, effort, and resources away from the people who are supposed to come first in the lives of a parent. i recently spoke with a women a bit younger than me who is dating a guy, living with him, and he is 6 years younger. calling them fat, saggy, etc…and those are the nicer things. some women will not wanna be with an older man, no matter what, they wanna be with a peer or nobody. the only reason i’m not dead yet is that my dad’s still awake. these are not poor dirt farmers, these are college educated women in the fastest growing economy in the world. if you want to be a “career woman”, more power to you, i’m not knocking you, and congrats for making that part of your life work out. because i am going to get my shit together, and i’m going to find myself a woman who’ll appreciate someone who’s willing to make her the center of his life, and who’ll do the same for me. then you proclaimed to be a catholic, so i am going to say missouri is your home state.’s not the reality for most children born to poor single mothers..Instead of dating cute 34-year-old single guys who don’t have kids, how about you date cute 43-year-old dads who will be delighted to meet a woman who gets THEM.: hanna rosin says we are witnessing the end of men! the reality is that most women want a peer, a partner – someone to grow old with, not someone who will practically be ready for the retirement home by the time their kids graduate from high school. if he's a deadbeat loser and you met him at a sleezy club or some crumby free dating site somewhere, chances are he won't be dependable and you'll end up supporting his kids without his help. i don’t think we should be quick to condemn or take umbrage with the single folks who don’t want to date someone with kids; i will admit, it used to bother me. not to mention i have personally known multiple men whose wives legally killed their babies without their consent. & she is the most amazing person in the world – bar none! do people expect men to date or even marry women they aren’t attracted to (like dating a woman who already has children of her own)? are going to keep this image in your head of this perfect man who is going to make you happy, and then one day you might even think you found him, and marry him. you were in a meaningful relationship and i am truly sorry for your loss. you search the web you will find that depending on what site you go on, stats are different. she might have to settle for someone average-alright in looks. shawna fode is your typical lower middle class, mid-size city chick who was attracted too all sorts of shady white men, including some with an axe to grind against people of color. are a ton of fat men with great personalities, who make decent money and who will never leave a woman. if you are a man who likes gambling then get married because thats what it is. i am dating my first single mother and i am beginning to hate it. single mothers don’t like it then they should have thought of that before they disposed of the father. my big brother is married to a woman who was a single mother. idiotic and narrow mindness of some of these people astound me. after some time, you’ll get it down to just one chick. i suggest you spend your energies making yourself a better person rather than judging every body else!" the truth is, "bad luck" and "society" didn't force you to date and breed with deadbeat losers. i don’t think you need sex to live and some definitions of drugs would in fact consider sex a potent drug- best to do only with the one you spend your life with. a single mom would rather go with an adventurous man than a dependable man. hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing. he will likely say something to the effect that she is a sweet person but she has too many kids for him. doctors are now prescribing hrt for guys even in their early twenties. i would rather my taxes go toward someone who fell upon hard times then someone who has a child or children knowing they can't afford them. agree that they are different, but by what arbitrary decree are women supposed to be or allowed to be more selective? the fact that you give gay parents a pass because the children “know their family is different” is laughable – it just shows you’re not thinking for yourself… “like gay is so totally in right now! at some point, you are going to have to stop holding out for mr. i started dating here after my first wife left me (we did not have children), and i was devistated. again, the irony of it all is that our society has been completely dominated by christian values – a marriage, nuclear family, chastity, etc. i got divorced at 37, and did do the dating thing – and have never gotten re-married. today women are earning a substantial amount of money and are capable of it also. the op is certainly welcome to continue trying to date someone her age. i am also explaining why any rational man would reach the same conclusion. changes like i’ve mentioned would make society and our economy better for everyone. you are suggesting that she cross her fingers and hope real hard and not change anything that she is doing. if both parents love and put the kids first, they will grow up healthier than most of their friends from a two-parent “perfect” home. i am happy he steps up to take care of his son and they love each other. he was clear he didn’t want our child so i didn’t register him as the father. or are there a significant percentage of guys who do care alot about intelligence and career of a woman? my definition of a decent guy is mostly they are smart enough to know what marriage laws have become for them and are opting out of marriage.: 11/14/2008msg: 1why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? the only consistent thing in their lives are a string of poor choices and lots of clear cut signs that he can't or won't commit. are a lot of single childless women out there like me. and you’re thinking only of yourself and not your children who are going to do worse in every conceivable measure than children from intact homes. this woman has every right not to be seen a some irresponsible woman. she and i are very close and i told her if/when she decided to have sex, hopefully it will at least be after she gets out of high school, she needed to talk to me first so that i can make sure she remembers to use protection. wife's friends from high school are all about 40 years old. again, soft, truthful vulnerability is in my opinion the best way to discuss this. i also wouldn’t have another daughter (and a son on the way). they want to take spontaneous romantic trips to vegas, which is something that’s hard to do with four children of your own. of these issues, all of these flags, knowing i didnt want this as my future but also not wanting it to end and not wanting her with someone else. them like the plague- even when things are going good- it never is the ideal situation. i think they need your saturday nights more than a random guy, sorry. to put the icing on the cake, i’m also african american. you can be 100% mommy now, and 100% sexy lady after your kids are grown – believe me, it’s worth the wait. feminists are so hateful of femaleness that they imagine that ingesting chemicals to suppress the natural functions of the healthy female body is something to be desired, as if the uniquely female power to be pregnant were a disease. so fellow men, if you're an alpha and all you want to do is bang as many broads as possible then carry on. to a single mom they would much rather go with an attractive man than a responsible man. are just too many obvious red flags with a loser - and if you ignore those signs and get pregnant, it's your fault. think the ex (single mom) was planning on getting pregnant with my child, because she started dating another guy after ,me, and got pregnant within three months., if i have a daughter or two later on and they become single mothers, then they have failed and i as a parent will have failed as well. i work 32 hours a week, own my own home in a very nice neighborhood, take my kids to soccer practice and games, we eat meals together, talk about their day, work on homework, etc. it’s simple… for one to own up to their part in something like that it takes a high level of humility and self-reflection which they don’t possess… my advice. i couldn’t respond to your most recent response to me there, i’m going to do it here. i’m so far outside her normal type, it was hard to fathom why she liked me., i think divorced parents with school age kids (either custodial or non-custodial) who date/get into other relationships are nothing more than selfish sycophantic prats. if they decide to end their marriage for good, then they will be single folks with kids. i'm not asking this in an accusatory way, but what are your thoughts on single moms who married someone who initially seemed like an ideal provider, but ended up being horrible abusive? i think it is going to be a very ugly very selfish society. for you to write such negative things toward a woman who got pregnant and decided to be a single mother you should be ashaimed of yourself. earlier than that and you are constantly interrupted by kids. i’m not desperate so i guess that’s in my favor but come on – even divorced women have needs that parenting doesn’t satisfy! when i first entered high school there were no pregnant teens. go get yourself spayed so this doesn’t happen again. some of us have really good jobs, a budget, goals and a plan. obody is perfect and yes that includes the bitter, judgemental and horrible person that you are who obviously only feels better about himself by juding others and putting other people down. who cheat, are addicted to porn, cause bankruptcy, are drunkards, selfish, lazy and disconnected to their wives and children are not exactly wonderful to live with nor great role models for the children born to them. posted: 1/2/2009 9:43:06 amtrue the rates of teen pregnancy have dropped because they actually preach safer sex while you are ther but the rates of those women rise when they leave the school system. but my older sis is a cambridge-educated lawyer and when dating her now-husband, she was no conventional beauty–definitely plump with slightly-above-avg features.” he would likely say no, or in some way try to state that it is just part of a relationship. seriously dated a single women with three kids- it was a horrible mistake., they are told to get a better job, to be more exciting and sucessful, etc. think the problem with the facts you cite is that they are currently self-fulfilling in our society. are always ready to have sex and will jump from one to another(bad thing but will be hailed for it),but for women its a different reaction all in all,women ought to know what they are getting into before they indulge,thats the only way you are going to stop having single moms added on the current list. tell me the reasons for not having a man in the picture aside, should all these men you are offering advice to jump head first into a relationship with a widowed mother? my mother was screwing teen boys and leaving my alone in my crib to do so. why do so many single moms have no desire to find a quality man but a huge desire to find a quality state?.”, but i have not once read or heard these assertions from any professional/respected media outlet, women’s/lifestyle/’progressive’ magazine, dating coach, dating blog or any other venue; only anonymous internet user comments to an article. on the contrary… i’ve dated a few single mothers and they have been the most selfish, manipulative, self-victimizing and flat out crazy people i have ever met. if she’s mean to people ditch her, because sooner or later she’ll be mean to you, if she’s mean to others. when a man picks a wife, he wants to know he won’t be competing with some random babydaddy who was there before him. i would also suggest just putting any serious dating aside for awhile, like a few years at least. why would some dude want to raise another man’s child- isn’t that like voluntary cuckholdry? they are so easily manipulated by girls and are fools for love too often and end up unhappy, cheat on their wives and paying for it for the next twenty years., even if everyone was a parent, that wouldn’t mean i’d have to date one.?Tim, what’s so great about being able to attract nsa sex when what we want is a great relationship? it’s clear that feminists don’t see women as full people but as some kind of feral beast that kills her own offspring for a little more food or other material gain. i think we share the same frustration that the bigger picture doesn't get discus…"gowiththeflow on how can i turn drinks into dinner without scaring guys off? but men aren’t playing ball, so women throw a tantrum about it. are several posters on here claiming to be good single mothers. outcomes for children of single mothers and married mothers with bas are worlds apart and if you think that is because mothers with bas are brilliant, well i feel sorry for you. because while you’re here commenting on how much better you are than they are, they’re pulling double duty being the mother and the father, providing a loving household for their children. i ask can this not wait one year so i can graduate with all the friends i have grown up with? i think that single moms should not seriously date anyone new until their kids are old enough and you aren’t needed like that. i’m sick of cum dumpsters making babies for a career choice. some reason old yeller comes to mind and it was a man who shot the dog in the end because it was the right and humane thing to do. but using catholicism as her reason for having the baby but the other side of the fence is sex outside marriage in the catholic religion is seen as dirty and sinful.! i was actually confused about dating a single mother myself, and recently went on a date with one. she isn’t able to dispute the topic so she tries to drag widows down to her level and shame men into submission. my son grew up playing travel hockey and playing the piano. you are an ignorant person and i see no value in attempting to open your eyes to the real world. man would be fortunate to meet a single mother with similar characteristics to my own single mother; responsible, selfless, hardworking and above all, loving. if they are so committed in their relationships then once they discover they are pregnant they should march their knocked up asses with the person who knocked them up into a court house church justice of the peace etc and show how committed they are and get married instead of making bastard babies and becoming a leech to society and a disgrace! i made note that i would need to win her love with treats, and quickly detailed doing so with a friends two dogs that did not like anyone. it seems that at this age, women care more about excitement than they do stability. meh i don’t feel like divorcees are bad people. are women expected to date men with a lower educational level? also come from a family with a bunch of bachelors who never got over their first heartbreak. for myself, i spent 16 years in the united states navy and went on to a successful career in the commercial diving industry. imo you should look for someone that maybe has a kid also, that way you can put up with each other’s stuff. there are programs for unwed mothers to go to school for free. for all the talk about may-december romances, statistically those are actually few and far between. why would you choose to ignore those signs before you chose to have a child with this person?’s a waste of time to chase people who aren’t interested in you. we do not care if we are not attractive to 20 year old guys, because with few exceptions, women do not want to date guys who are that much younger than themselves. they have been lied to by society and their friends about the reality of not only men, but also the dating market. she was married to a man that she claims verbuly was abusive and passive aggressive and also claims he raped her and or would only initiate sex while she was sleeping . very easy for us women to develop high physical and sexual expectations of men because obtaining sex is so easy for us. “i felt sorry for him being locked up, nobody to talk to except other prisoners. it is about the many cases when you are starting to hang out with two people, and like them both and you then have to let go of one. feminists believe women are too stupid to know the scientific fact that the unborn in the womb are human beings, i. who just happened to think the wrong guy was the one… it happens and i’m sorry but i’m catholic and could never abort my child not that i’m opposed to others getting one that’s their business… but as a woman who was committed to getting married (with a ring and date set), educated, job holding, non drug addicted person i saw nothing wrong with procreating even if it was untimely she’s no mistake and definitely no wretch.
women have put themselves in the situation where they are today, they did it to themselves. while devastating, after many months and taking time to heal and being patient with one another during the painful process, the children and i were able to move past it fairly well. by every reasonable scientific definition a zygote is a member of the species homo sapiens. and moms boyfriends just can’t cut the mustard here unless they’re real serious. now, as i have had some life experience, i find that i would rather they just reject me up front. most of her friends are married, never divorced and have a great family. women@some lady (view comment)i call bs to your post. all of us started like that and that’s why when we kill someone else, it is murder. we are the judgemental ones yet according to you single men are all “irresponsible, immature, dependant and [only want sex]”! if you did a study in the outskirts of detroit or the like you might find a bunch of single mothers who are drug addicts, uneducated and in and out of jail. people who confuse being safe with giving their children permission when they will make the decision regardless of the consequences is a parent that doesn't really care about preventing the unwanted/unplanned pregnancy. but this doesn't fit the criteria of a single mom. have also found that white men tend to have the problem of being emasculated by a wife or girlfriend who makes more money than they do. is: single moms are better off staying singlethese type of women are much better off staying single altogether since many men will never get involved with a woman like this to begin with since they do carry a lot of drama with them. he also suffered colic and bronchitis and somehow he was my responsibility. but if you have children then you are choosing the risks that come with that., in this particular situation, there is no indication that any of these apply to the woman who asked the question. we hear that men over 40 are all beer bellied, losers with poor hygiene. of course she started the processes while she was still dating the guy and after they broke up she found out she was pregnant. certain people are more likely to act a certain way. short term it’s easier to do things without wrangling the logistics of a single mother and long term a lot of these guys don’t want the added responsibility.'s like saying it's a woman's fault when she gets dates a beta and gets raped because she should know that "betas" are often sexually frustrated. if most single mothers were like you, you would not see the disastrous outcomes for their children. plus, he has also likely dealt with woman who don’t want to deal with his kids. since it clearly doesn’t fit into your stereotype of what a single motheris is. i said things i can’t take back as well as she , i make mistakes because i am human it’s what i take away from the lesson is the key , i can share with you my friends this , i miss her dearly and know i was in it to win it , my story personally is tragic because of the potential i saw with her and us as a team and at the end of the day that’s what it takes to play a team ! she never has done anything with her life but lay on her back for lots of men and pushed out 2 daughters she didn’t take care of. just about all women marry a man to try and change him, because thats what they are attracted to. as has also been noted by many top shelf women here, the top shelf men their age aren’t interested, because they are top shelf, they are finding younger women who unlike you, are interested. but for the most part, you usually end up in bad situations - like being a struggling single mother - because you made terrible choices in your partner. (adoption or giving it to the mother) but until that happens men might be more likely to be better as single parents than women. only do i think about who my child could have been then and now, i feel incredibly guilty that i ended an innocent life so that i could live my life the way i wanted. there will be a much better woman for you in the future. > blog > dating > i’m a single mom who is ready to give up on men because they all want sex. just stay single after 35 and i’ll see you at the mustang ranch. for every good-looking, childless, never-married man over the age of 40, there are about 50 who are no longer that attractive who’ve already had all the kids they want, and just got divorced. i suppose you would do the only reasonable thing and advise all self-respecting men to stay away from her.? some people thrive off drama and hurting people i guess . and here you are whining that women over 50 feel invisible. i just don’t think it’s fair that she compromise on dating guys her own age, if that’s what she truly wants. a rebuttal of that video was soon made by a single mom, explaining why she dont date single men with no kids. and when they have to give up or pay spousal support or alimony which there is a growing number of this happening guess who is complaining. he still smses daily, and one thing he likes to say is “you’re getting older, u think many other guys will want u? well maybe i’m standing up for some good folks who worked and contributed to society and are treated second rate so our government can take good care of your baby factory acquaintances. you said "why are so many 18-22 year olds single moms". you are short, fat, older or an asian man, you must read this., there is no way i would have ever taken on four ! women have it in there minds that someone owes them, no matter what. by going through this topic had brought second thoughts in my mind regarding my relationship, i’m currently dating a single mom of a 3 year old son, we both love each other.: 12/14/2008msg: 21why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? men have caught on to the whole "alpha fux/beta bucks" and are dropping out. yet there also great guys like that guy who posted a video of he and his much older wife dancing. therefore, it’s a waste of time complaining about it being unfair. would not classify myself as being a feminist…i would say that i am moral and have standards of human decency and respect for treating my husband the way i want to be treated…and if he does not, then we either negotiate about what is being brought to the table or there will be consequences…and that works both ways. what i do know and have seen is that ive heard some pagans make comments and say “those damned christians” to each his own i guess. might even go through her best years trying to attract a younger man only to strike out in this endeavor, only t find herself in a position, when she is 40 plus, where the only men serious about dating her are ten years older. it is likely that single mothers and single fathers both put their child’s needs first, or not first. those emotions that you have felt for this person don’t just fade away. make the range equal on both sides and then just ignore the older guys you aren’t interested in. is spot-on and, actually, for the record, i have stopped dating because my priority is my child. if you let yourself get easily frustrated, then your best strategy is to avoid dating. just let him know that you aren’t going to sit around and let him lash out at yo in his pain. none of the women i have known have ever specifically sought out older men. my ankle monitor died that night, so the police came and picked me up. she was always employed, never got a cent from welfare, she went to college (not on the taxpayer dime) and was married to my father before i was born. is a shame that many kids are losing their virginity at 12 or 13 but this is what happens when people want to wait until that age to actually talk to their children about sex, if they ever do. we get to decide whether we breed or not based on whether or not we want to, and many do. you worked your con job and are doing well now. with a baby you can get free child care if you choose to go back to school. i’ve talked to the son of a bitch on several occasions, and he just wants to be footloose and fancy free. i am a woman, who has had many women friends and coworkers over the years. seems that you are very restricted in the free time that you are able to give to a partner. as long as people are trying to do and be the best person they can be isn’t that the best role model for a child. i made mistakes to affect my sons life and refuse to bring another child into this world out of wedlock. seems to be fairly common to see women frustrated about men not wanting a relationship with them because they have kids, but it often appears that these women aren’t considering men that have children as potential partners. then when you are 50, he will still be there with you and you won’t have to deal with this mess. i am quite shocked and amazed by the negative and judgemental comments… personally i would not date a single man… i think they are are irresponsible, immature, dependant… all they are in for is sex sex sex…. there are waiting lists everywhere for infertile and homosexual couples who want a baby who cannot make a baby themselves. i believe also all parents should have mandatory child rearing classes. remember this is my point of view, there would be guys that go into it but it’s just not me. why are some men so infatuated with other mens babies coming out of their girlfriends cunt before he got to her. it’s about time someone challenged the socially popular and out-of-date consensus that single moms (widows excluded) are some sort of angelic, ambivalent, selfless people. any man really insists on falling in love with a single mom he needs to talk to the baby’s real daddy to ascertain the truth about the woman. arrested for rape, then go on the welfare while he waits to get. here’s the thing, “career women” are married alright…they’re married to their jobs. the video made it crystal clear that single men without men choose to date women without kids based on preferences. so long as you don’t assume that dates mean sex, i would love to go out with you. is mentioning the word “settling” so anathematic to women here? i bet more so-called christians engage in shit like swinging than pagans. you don’t have to tip them, you don’t have to pay their taxes, or their healthcare. don’t dispute that women may have a preference for men close to their own age, but the fact is, if that isn’t working for you, what are you going to do? i am as happy as i have ever been right now, and this kind of bliss wouldn’t be possible without the wonderful single-mother that i met more than 5 years ago. but fetal factories are something else ones should run away from. know 2 single mothers who are struggling and it breaks my heart seeing them and especially their innocent children suffering from moronic decisions their mother made.! poor you, the bitterness in your tone is fairly obvious you have some serious issues, maybe you should exercise some compassion and offer some respect on those who may have made mistakes and are obviously taking the responsbility and actions to do the best she can to provide for her kids., if i remember right, you are like in your late 20’s or early 30’s and still a virgin, right? the people i’m referring to aren’t divorced women. ideally, i want guys within 3-5 years of my age range, but to put that in a profile would limit my dating pool too much. you can’t force a woman to give up her free welfare money. they feel left out and basically are joining a cult. and actually many children from single mothers turn out like that. and dating a single mother isn’t for you, but that doesn’t mean it is not for anyone else as well. the pill is a class one carcinogen according to the who but yah, women should totally take a cancer causing agent to chemically spay themselves so a man and jaunt around their internal organs with no consequence, like the man accepting how a woman basically functions. women aren’t taught the billings method first so they feel they have to take the pill so they won’t get pregnant. about 5 mins later, i got a long text message from her saying that i wasn’t what she expected and wished me luck on finding somebody. even if it takes two to tango i can assure you there could be nothing that she did that made her deserve the years of torment (even a visit from him after she divorced him). stating that single mothers may often times be troubled individuals is different that claiming that most are stupid, poor and uncaring. people sometimes have to deal with things they may not like and they have to sacrifice things for the other person. i’m the oldest of my siblings by years, so no adult companionship there.. many of our parents never thought their marriage would end and it did. you are going to wake up one day and find that the best guys are taken, or no longer interested in you. posted: 1/2/2009 8:50:05 am"my point is why are so many young women having kids at an age where they aren't fully adults yet? you are not entitled to get the man or woman that you want, otherwise, all men, even 50 and 60 years old would date 20 and 25 year old women, and all women would have the bad boy millionaire type. every painful moment, every sad moment, every fucked up part of my entire life, i’d relive them all just so that i could hold her for five seconds at the end. yet it is entirely possible that a nice person made a mistake when they were younger by copulating with some guy and decided to have the courage to raise the kid alone., i am a single father with an 8yr old daughter. pointing out how things are unfair and what needs to change so that the dating world can be fair is a ridiculous waste of time. adult or the attitude need to be certain thing is something some people will never have and others have it in their teens. the only person that can change your situation is you.. of all races, have become more open to dating men of other races. and if your mother just so happens to be a medical professional and you follow in her footsteps it might be easier for you to get a well paying job straight out of high school to pay for college! you're less educated on the matter then every single parent between the ages of 18 and 22 on this forum. i love a few other women who happen to be single moms, i really do.“i think it’s a bit unfair to suggest christina has to change her type just to clinch someone. not the that men she wants, and even some she feels she would be settling for. some day she wont need me this much and she will have her own life and i’ll have to go out there and get myself a new one. your daughter was born and you tried for another while you were still single. actually, women who have been unhappy with their love lives, who make a significant change in some way, tend to be very happy. 40+ year old male, have been with a single mother for 3 years with one small child..i puppy love sometimes but i’m over that shit in about a week…my husband i loved…then one day his high school crush contacted him on facebook…some chick he pined for for years apparently…and i stopped mattering…this chick screwed you over because shes afraid to feel again. if you had a car there is gas and insurance. is a perfect example of the feminut “truth”:If a woman cheats on a man, it is because he is not giving her something she needs. now add in the fact that you will never be #1 in her heart…well…what exactly is the upside for one of these guys who are single with no kids? then, out of the blue for no reason, he became a horrible, abusive monster! speaking in real terms not all women are bad and like this. again the reason why there is “friction” is because middle class and lower middle class/working class white men now have to compete for the same women. there are many women like her, but not nearly as good looking, who can’t get guys into bed with them, at least not with any regularity. so there were 2 incomes before the split it wasn’t that hard handling the last semester on my own… and have you heard of dual enrollment? and married men and women both know this which is why they don't waste their time with losers who have all the signs of an instable person. mitt romney caught some flack for saying basically the same thing at cpac last year, but the man is right. have no stability in my life right now, yet a single mom has thrown very obvious hints of interest.” their delusional desires to feel sexy and not like a mother somehow take precedence over their children’s psychological well-being. moms are much more likely to go after alpha men who are attractive, muscular and good in bed and hope that they can keep the man by giving him more sex and following his every whim. my siblings and i were raised by day care and were the first gen latch key kids in the early 80s. to see some statistics on just how many single mothers are ” stupid”, ” poor” , and do not ” care about their children”. to boot i’m overweight so i don’t think i could get a date with a single dad who was overweight ugly as sin inside and out simply because i’m disgusting. just want to add, for what it’s worth, that if she can juggle dating and raising up good, well-adjusted kids, then i do wish her the best of luck in finding what she’s looking for. because, let's face it, most single mothers in that age bracket do not hold full-time jobs and live off the system. that’s a pretty tough thing for any human being to do, to not play the victim, but overcome the entire issue, to include seeing the angry, abusive ex as a broken person as well. you have made it quite plain how you would eventually treat responsible, mature, independant, genuine, sincere, single men. i broke up with her the next monday, it didn’t stay that way though for long we got back together off and on because i think we were both tiered of being alone so it ended up being an emotional roller coaster that just ended three weeks ag. if you’re willing to date older, you can often get someone who is a much better catch than the younger people who are willing to date you. i am fully aware that had i taken after my dad’s side, i would not have this luck. your son has a chance to become a single man with kids if he has kids with his future wife. i’m not saying that guys should prefer single moms as i do, what i say is this: she could possibly be a girl straight from this post and is the a-hole this post describes. you’re looking to answer your most pressing dating and relationship question, my blog is like google for your love life!“when you meet a divorced single mother, immediately start looking for the flaw. as to having kids it takes more then wanting to do the right thing for them it takes the resorces to do it and lot of men and women should not be having kids before they are ready to provide for them also. thankfully there are blogs such as this one which show us what kind of people they really are. your focus should be on your children, not dating or finding love. trac, i hope you never reproduce with your failure at reading comprehension: “her kids are, and should be, her priorities. this site is called judgy bitch and this is america so fuck off unwed mother. women need to be held accountable for their actions, there are plenty of great guys out there but those guys aren't making ladies vaginas moist. it makes no difference if 1 in a thousand single mothers is mother theresa when the remaining likely hood and impact of the risks to the man and any of his children is so devastating. why break up, when, only three days before, there was no sign of anything being wrong? do i deserve to be alone forever because i am a single mother? the reason is because kids can get very attached to the “partners” of their parents and often suffer greater heartbreak and emotional turmoil when they couple breaks up. which is exactly why so many women are opting out. you are choosing a decision that may make you a single mom if the guy leaves. i read dating column comments, i very often see (presumably women) posters regularly use phrases such as “women are [constantly] told to [settle] . to give them some hope that it might be you, and then leave them is unspeakably cruel. accomplished men do consider women outside their race, single mothers no matter how they got to that point are not considered at all, why should they? i’ve had many friends and coworkers over the years complain that guys on dating sites who contact them are way too old., not knocking you for being successful, i also don’t know you personally (so don’t assume). many more young women are keeping their babies with the help of caring families that are no longer embarassed because their child provided proof that they engaged in premarital sex. point here, is find a guy your age now while guys are still in the mood to marry women their age. also, she loved giving oral and was great at it. i can get to a computer i will name some specifics from the dating single mothers and the dating single fathers argument.
i just know that this place has helped me through some rough patches in the past. me, and i can’t speak for everyone here, it isn’t women like you we are bitching about. due to unwed mothers blackmail tactics to my parents with the tension it created going home wasn’t an option though i asked if i could. am not from that time, there were no pregnant teens at my inner city high populated high school because it wasn't a "popular" thing to do. these women are definitely competing for an ever shrinking pool of men. btw i wasn’t comparing your comments to my ex’s nasty remark, i was comparing my sentiments towards him to the sentiments that some women have towards much older men. a 40-something, childless guy, i am occasionally one of ‘those guys’ the op complains about but it’s only because my many experiences/relationships with westernized women (many of them single moms) as a whole has taught me two universal truths: 1) women love and crave attention [mitigates self-esteem issues so many women have], and 2) women with any appreciable smv will always seek out a guy who is better, younger, richer, whatever than her [re: hypergamy] and if she marries him, will likely bail if he ever loses this status, even if only temporarily. i’ve been talking to a lady recently and was thinking of breaking my “no single mom’s” rule, but now i won’t! all sluts are about one thing and one thing only . there are women in her shoes that have gone years without sex.), as there will likely be no shortage of older men at that time either :-)..Reelaxjoined: 11/14/2008msg: 3why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? single mum with a child can never marry anyone again or date…shes already been married already had a child and for a single guy to involve with a single mum is wasting his time buying a used car with a damaged engine ready to blow up at a young age, every single mum says shes divorced but speaks to her ”x” husband at least once a week due to the child…they may as well be married again…. having had to watch my own back means that i would not be considered worthy of remarriage to a good fellow for having endured and then using common sense to escape such a man…and if i am the one to be scrutinized for his character issues which were brilliantly concealed or had later developed over the course of many years by his own poor choices, then i would perhaps elect to remain single too rather than being branded and rejected wholesale. i was a single mother due to my partner of 8 years choosing alcohol over his child and myself, i am now married to an awesome man and we now have a child on the way.? more and more started to surface as time went on and i am ashamed i let it continue for so long, i told her thank god i never introduced my daughter to you or your son , you are not fit to be around her . i think you’ll learn more about the person’s values by having conversations with them than judging them by their statistic as a single mother. married couples have to cancel date night at a moments notice, you can’t have conversations without being interrupted and yes you would have to spend money on your own kids too, so if all of that is “yuck” don’t have kids or you will just end up creating another single mother. so as of now, so i haven’t allowed myself to “date” until i’ve fully got myself together. you are all still slaves and white women are your masters | judgybitch(). again, i only point that out because there are women who would be happy for even that.’s an ignorant hypothesis at best( yours), but without some evidence supporting you ignorance, it’s just an angry rant by an individual who got burned at some point.: 6/4/2007msg: 11why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? now of course i don’t see the benefits outweighing the risks of dating even if i wait a year or five for a man to meet my son. and if adultery did occur, she would have to prove that there is no more feelings for each other. young men should encourage this too, since i think too many are duped into becoming fathers when they are too young and just not ready. as for the observation that we do not live in a perfect world but a fallen one, that’s something not caused by god. times it is about the fact they were late and they weren't fed breakfast and are very hungry. you can’t have a “do-over” and think things are gonna be great – you brought your 4 kids into the world and they come first, i assume. i ended up dating women who ranged from 11 years younger to 16 years older. but right after baby and the d and c sever and fuse permanently her tubes so there is no more chances to make more “welfare checks”. oh, and for the record, he didn’t start treating me like this until our son was born. think my husband was the only one without a kid out there somewhere. sometimes its her fault that she has a child out of wedlock. the approximate wage for a person who has no college. i'm not saying that there are no young parents who do the same, but i'd rather my taxes go to someone who needs a leg-up, than someone who waited until she was 30 to have kids and can't even claim ignorance., maybe is ok to date a single mom, but not spending money on her child., ever assume a divorced woman is some innocent blushing maid cruelly abused by some terrible man. i know you do so out of caution, but learn to see the grey contours not just the black and white.’s the crux of the issue – a widow is husband-less not by (poor) choices, while unwed mothers/divorced mothers are. i focused on just my own family, raising the boys, building my career, and becoming completely content with being alone. it has nothing to do with fairness; there is nothing fair about the dating world. women who are happily married are almost always more wise and mature than single moms. as a childless woman, i tried dating single dads, the kind who shared 50% custody. bottom line is that for her, her kids are a big part of her life and she loves them immensely. ever age thinks their time is worse than earlier eras when the truth is that things stay the same or tend to get a bit better in most areas. it’s not because i didn’t bang single mothers. feel sorry for them because they always complain that nobody wants date them because they are single moms. this is something that all of us have to deal with when dating. no matter how much the other person says they hate the place they are in , people make choices and place themselves in the hell there used to. (by the same logic, women should steer clear of single dads. i don’t hear men say, i need to find my soul mate and ditch their husband. some men can be just as bad, my own brother i am sad to say is also 39yrs old and moved back in with mommy after his relationship failed, he has a 9yr old daughter who i love to pieces but he sleeps on moms couch, doesn’t pay rent, doesn’t buy food or pay bills all this despite having a full time job. you made that choice and because of that choice, he left you a single mother. as a natural result i didn’t know how to talk to women (more importantly pick ones that had some resemblance of ethical virtue). please do all of us women, single moms and just single, a favor and move to the eastern world so you don’t have to deal with us western women. single mothers have already demonstrated how disposal they consider fathers. before we completely derail this thread, i can confirm that some white women do have babies with the criminal element; white, latino, black, even asian men and eventually end up being single mothers. thank god there are decent men out there though none on this page clearly. is a case of many but not all… so you single women are going to be fighting for a very limited type of dude. a lot of entrenched views and unconscious bias on this thread so just want to finish off my contribution that has appeared to have exorcised so many by wishing christina the best of luck in the future and hope that you get the relationship you want. and how they compromise is the difference between single moms and married moms. he oved to my hometown and we are great and with my 4 kids. we are brave and you shouldn’t be even talking , because you don’t have that much love like we do… just start loving yourself. under: personal development, brawn > brains, state husband, raised by children, victim of self. you could argue that the men who buggered off should be there but how many times does it take to get it that there are many men like that? you’ve got absolutely no idea what you’re trying to preach about. i am in my late 20's and i would venture to guess that half of my female friends are single moms. so after adding up the numbers, i’ve determined that in north america; i have been priced out of the dating market.’m sorry to say this but why do people jump first and then look afterwards? some people just don’t click, no matter how much both try. they also don't think long term when it comes to having children, which is probably partly due to the "welfare state" as you call it. condoms break, birth control can fail and people are making the best of it and moving on. maybe you could compose songs while you drive around or sing. but the author nails it about viewing single parents with a great deal of skepticism when it comes to dating them.#4, start dating men significantly less attractive than she is used to. a child of a divorced, single mother; everything written sounded exceptionally truthful. no, because many people meet and fall in love in high school and college, where most people are within 3 to 5 years age difference.” she should say, “i absolutely love sex…i just don’t like it in uncommitted relationships. posted: 1/2/2009 8:34:02 amactually you've contradicted yourself and gotten some facts wrong. says, aside from you, that your spawn is “incredibly bright” (especially since you have no other children to compare her to).: 10/24/2008msg: 20view profilehistorywhy are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? but doing my due diligence as a parent has ramifications for generations. loser men were usually broke, in between jobs, living on their parents house, divorced, had a history of dating and ending dozens of relationships because they couldn't commit, and other qualities that are common among loser, low quality men. why would they take on such huge responsibility if they could find someone else without that responsibility? all due respect, that’s the exact sort of narrative that i think any man (or woman, if the roles are reversed) should be skeptical of:“i did nothing wrong! jb has not even covered serveral more reasons why this is an extremely bad idea for you. there are emotional reprocussions from having abortions or giving children up for adoption but how is that any better or worse then not being able to feed that child you couldn't muster the strength to make a tough decision to not carry that child to full term. they choose who they will actually marry, so long as the other person also wants it. even thinking back to 2 year relationship i had with a single mother and her son reflects this. though its reasonable to blame it all you want on men,the choice is the woman's at the end,because women hold the keys to progression to be frank. no, sorry, not in the sense of the word that they meant it. is coming from the same person who published an article saying "hitler was actually a great guy"., single parents of either sex who are open to dating and especially “sexual” are huge red flags. i just don’t understand why you think it’s the women who are the financially or emotionally needy ones when relationships break down. he's done it over and over in every other area of his life. if more fathers would step up, less women would need the so called system! she has passed on sub jobs at schools, turned down job offers from friends , but tells me she needs to get her and her son out of her parents house because its not a healthy invionment for her or him ? don’t tend to agree with this particular post, on a personal level, anyway. you’re always the third wheel, you always come second; her kids are, and should be, her priorities. are tough economic times we are in so where is the compassion that women are supposed to naturally have when faced with those moments? but you must remember that these are humans we are talking about, a species where no two are alike. while i am sure she will get some young men giving her what she wants, she will also get exactly what she is giving out. (he was so damn lucky) i was thinking, why wuold someone do that, knowing how hard it was to already be a single mom. different educational outcomes are compared for 409 children in single-father, 3,483 in single-mother, and 14,269 children in biological two-parent families. dont think you can control her or help her to resolve her problems. the chances of you being number one in her life are slim to none. are you ok with being similarly judged by other women who chose partners, had children with them, and are still married? chances are good that, some months or years from now, evan (or another dating coach) will hear from her again . almost all of them working at some pink economy job, none of them high wage earners. think there would be plenty of older fathers that would be sympathetic to her commitment to her children – certainly more so than a childless 34 y/o. i find something very wrong with a women who can’t readily tell you her part in a failed relationship or marriage. so yes, you women can very, very, easily get hot guys into bed.@tim: there’s no ego problem, most of us ladies know that it’s easy for most women–incl unattractive ones–to get nsa sex; since there are some very unfussy men around. i have had many women tell me when i wear it that i should either shave it or color it because it ages me. this is a totally different viewpoint than the single mom. are not the average single mother but i see a few problems with you proclaiming your above the fray. she wants the 8, 9 or 10, who also has all these other great qualities. there’s nothing wrong with being a single mother, the issue, like evan mentioned, is lifestyles not gelling. a sweet, if undisciplined little girl, just like jb says, the kid wanted a daddy so bad. to be rude but the poster was not talking about women like you so your comment really was not needed. i’m not here to satisfy someone else’s needs at the expense of my own, that’s not a relationship. i know so many men and women who would rather cut their legs off, than be on their own for any period of time. people go into adulthood these days wanting one big party, when in fact if one is taught that way unless they figure it out sooner rather than later they will just face and cause chaos. if one of your kids grows up to be a single mother? my feminist mother decided her personal career was more important than relocating so her kids could be with their father and keep the family unit intact. got more but those are two shinning examples,I wondered why she had 3 flatscreens in her house…1 in the basement. she and i are together at least 3 days each week, sometimes more. so guys 29 to 39 are hitting on her and going on dates. as a mother myself, i totally endorse the author’s cautions against getting involved with single moms. other times, they are unfit to do this, and others the woman isn’t close with her parents. so lighten up and just enjoy life and try instead to pursue real love and that comes only through sacrifices and hard work. be so blind, so self-unaware, so into “blaming others for blaming,” you done gotsta be a feminist. did have a mini-breakdown on my birthday, got so drunk that i couldn’t walk, and posted a long, bitter diatribe on the website where we met. in today’s day and age, what rock are you living under that you don’t know how to avoid getting pregnant? woman who keeps her baby alive is a better person than a woman who kills her babies. it forces him to see her as a real person with real emotions, and real vulnerabilities. guys are sexually attracted to a wide variety of women. are you telling me that you had no choice in any of these decisions? or did you know in advance that you and the father of your two kids would someday divorce, and you decided to go ahead and make babies anyway?, like all women seem to wear it as a badge of honor that you care about more things. many more young women are keeping their babies with the help of caring families that are no longer embarassed because their child provided proof that they engaged in premarital sex. if you’re not on welfare and are trying to improve your life for yourself and your kid then i applaud that. while a much younger woman can get by more on her youth and looks, an older woman will have to be sweeter, more forgiving, more patient, more generous, more health conscious, less selfish, etc… the same holds true for an older man which is probably why people who do get into these relationships as the younger person, often report that it is the best relationship they’ve had. more than that frances fails to provide any reason to dispute the topic of the thread. when it was the early stages of our relationship she informed me that she had broke up with the father of her child due to some certain circumstances. hate how single mothers are judged so harshly by some but some us don’t help ourselves by continuing to date the same dickheads over and over again, and worse, having more babies with them. because all these things are important to them they are able to flip the switch from play mode to marriage material mode with men. she has had bad intuition about the relationship from the beginning even though i treated her and her girls well but was careful not to get ‘too involved’. would you date someone who just parties a lot and, because of that, drinks regularly (at those parties? of course you are going to have the attitude that you have. she has more time for you and is more carefree. who drive almost three hours arrive at midnight just to freak out the next morning , now mind you we went straight to bed when she came to my house and she said she didn’t feel good and mentioned that night so i sad your safe its ok , next morning all hell broke loose . if she happens to prefer guys younger than her, no amount of telling her to look for someone older is going to change what she really wants and likes. i don’t think anyone wakes up wanting to be a single parent of 4 kids. so she will no longer have sex with a man that is not worth that gift. they are human beings who need to be thought about before 2 horny people get together. are welcome to read the blog, and maybe learn something that isn’t pure ideological bullshit, but you are done commenting.: 12/14/2008msg: 24why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22? my friends are all married and i hate it when the conversation comes around to me “needing a man in my life”. dating a single mom won’t be a nightmare if you have the same beliefs that killing an innocent child in order to live up to the standard of society is wrong. but it still takes two to tango for both sides so i would be wary of each parent that is single. well with these changes comes the problem society and culture has changed . is it unfair to suggest that she considers dating men who are in the same boat as her as opposed to men who don’t have kids? stupidity is very common and it does not discriminate against single mothers or married parents. so instead a few years later, she hook up with another man that already had a girlfriend, paid for his bus ticket from north carolina to washington state (vancouver). our own beds, now we parent up and own it! as a single father just accept (your choice not your ex’s) that dating can resume when they’ve left home. i like that you dont tip toe around what most men are thinking(behind their opposite views they spew in order to get laid from said single moms. there are tons and tons of guys out there who will not leave a woman but many women are not attracted to these guys. stop your benefits for reproducing if you’re on welfare. topic is launching so many thoughts, being that i am a single parent. a true gentleman will seek to be her knight in shining armor, if he cares that much about her, or at a minimum, will not feel good about using her and so he won’t. i walk six miles to the nearest neighbor still around to use the cell phone. a single parent, i often hear people who are happily married with children say you should be content with being a parent now and put your own human needs for intimate love and support on hold for the next 10 years until you are “child free”. should all men steer clear of me cause i am a shitty excuse of a person because i am a single mom? so a 20 year old woman is going to have a much easier time getting a 20 year old man. i have made the mistake of dating single mothers in the past as well, and the problems i experienced were almost identical in all three relationships, which tells me today that dating a single mother should be the very last option for a man seeking a relationship.