Dating a married man (wives, girlfriend, marriage, womanmarine/cop working long hours…so the work, wife and lover became to much for him to manage. years when i was with my ex, but when with my ex i said so many times i can’t carry on like this, i wanted commitment. take care of yourself and detach from your married man. depend on him for love and if you’re not married just trust in god and leave this man alone. these married men will continue to suffer in their marriages and even if they divorce, trust will always be an issue with them. many people think it doesn’t just happen but it does. he was having performance problems with her so i barely got it 1x/week for fear if she might want some he’d have to do it. i have many scars from an abusive relationship, physically and emotionally. it’s hard to believe that so many of us have the same similar story. i broke up with my married man for 2 months now., i like to read your writing about how to deal with the thoughts of the married man and his wife. i need to break up with my married man but cant bring myself to do it. after all, it’s not all about dating and affairs, is it?” “what if my married man’s excuses are actually valid? is utter rubbish and now i realise, a free man can be loved from head to toe inside out 24/7 so much more than the attached men! have been involved with a married man for almost 12 years. i kept asking a million questions to friends, so i could understand the man’s side of it. do t forget men are there when it’s easy when it start being hard and requiring real proof of love they leave us alone, because ” you are so strong, you are the stronger woman i have ever met it’s incredible” bullshit, they just want to take the guilt away and feel like we can endure anything that the wife can’t. the married men who refuse to let go of their marriage are the types that find too difficult to face their problems and to deal with reality so they need a fantasy to escape to. told me he was happily married he didn’t want to leave her. he is not prepared to start all over again with a younger woman with a young child. and when i said this time i mean one of many breakups we’ve had. in the end the other woman gets hurt,sad and feeling isolated. they love the attention, that another woman out there wants them, craves them, needs them and they love that relationship, i will let her have me when i want to let her have me. peace with the fact that nothing in life is permanent, you can’t hold on to him or anyone else or anything. too had a year long affair with a man here at work. i don’t think he can help it cause i know i’m not the only woman he’s had an affair with. that you are letting go of a man who doesn’t belong to you. of course making it easy for him and he was still married! if this man wanted to reach you, there would be absolutely nothing that would stop him, period. tonight i did speak with my married men and i was like a crazy women for a solid hour and i told him it was over and he begged me to give him one last chance & that he will do his best by me and he knows he has treated me badly and it’s going to stop. erin: is the married man i’ve been dating for 4 years just using me? you and i have more or less the same age, we have so many years to be happy. we are not dirty secrets, we are woman who deserve to be cherished and loved, dont ever settle for less than that.’m on this site because a couple months ago, i got involved with a different married man (yea, real bright). well one day out of the blue (i was doing well without him, i am the one who broke it off) he left a message on my vm that he was getting married. writing this to make sense out of the relationship i had with a married man to see if anyone agrees, or has also experienced, or thought the same way about this..why would you want to see a man like that?’s what one of my readers said about breaking up with the guy she was having an affair with:“i became involved with a married man after my divorce,” says kay on how to end your toxic love affair now – before it’s too late. look at us all, all of us in the same pain, they rarely chose the other woman..don’t imagine them, stop doing it (i used to do the same…so many times), you need to get busy, all the time, just keep yourself busy so your mind is busy, then you are tired go to bed sleep and it is the next day. that was 6 weeks ago and he has been round for sleepovers twice ( how can she put up with this) and yesterday he turned up after 11 days no contact (my choice) to tell me how much he loves me, how sorry he is for hurting me and i’ve told him not to come again and not to contact me again, i need more than crumbs of this man and his wife needs him to step up and be the man she thought she had married. we all want to be with our married men for one more time😔. i’m zooey i recently got involved with a married man when i’m also married we’ve been seeing each other for about 3 months until last week when he text me and said he valued his wife and jesus more and he is sorry. have been involved less then a year with a married man. after the christmas holiday, i told him i didn’t want to continue anymore and i managed to put a stop to it for a few months. should i tell her wife what a type of man she married to. these men lie and manipulate and by the time you realise, you’re in love with low self esteem as a result of competing with his wife. because i finally moved on from my married man at one point in life. i feel that i will never find a man and i will be alone forever. i didn’t even tell the mm i had feelings for him, i just knew that if i felt so strongly, i could not get married! thinking that the man will leave and you will get your happily ever after.’m astonished reading your stories about having an affair with a married man. i have been to therapy and am a very self reflective woman who believes we are all continually evolving. you went through so many hard situations that you deserve the best from now on! it’s so hard to think of all the beautiful memories we shared, yet knowing that none of it meant anything to him, which is why it’s also so hard to see him as even being human. want to end this affair because you know it’s wrong to cheat with another woman’s husband.) how did he expect us to live together and raise a child if he was married -no response. i’m married myself, 2 young kids, and ended my affair exactly 1 month ago today..my married man was three decades older than me he is 54 and i’m 27 and his wife was my pastor. it may sound a bit harsh to many because most of us are oblivious to, or in denial of, what a narc is capable of. then he told her he was married with 2 kids but we still all went out as friends.. long story short, a married man persued me, we have what you would refer to as an online romance/affair/fling there really is no words to it. hes just using you nothing more, lies lies lies, iv been there, if he really wanted you for real, he would leave his wife and all his commitments, , married men will say anything, to get you into bed, because in reality its all they are after, wise up girl, i did. now, she urges you to stop cheating with another woman’s husband. decided to make this comment because i’ve read so many posts about “the wife” being the problem (obstacle, barrier, etc. week before last i was going out of my mind about this guy and did read your post many times to real in my besottedness (is that a word? and therefore, a vulnerable woman is the perfect thing for them. when you sleep with your boss, you entangle your love life with your financial affairs — and the best thing to do after you stop dating a married man is to get financially independent! but it is helping to know i’m not the only one in this world who has made the selfish mistake of being with a married man, but i guess you can’t help who you fall in love with. i conjured up in my own mind that i could be the one that provided the love and relationship to him while he made money with this woman. though i have never expected, but we share the bed, we did not have intercourse as his dialogue was until and unless we get married we should not have that. the author: thank you for validating the love and the relationship even though it is taboo. but thats not enough we need to be the one and only woman in a relationship with a man. i know you have put great faith in mr tudor, the narcissistic sociopath, to explain away all our married men.’ve been reading several articles about breaking up from an affair with a married man….. i later went on facebook and found out he had been married 3 years now. amanda, when i was reading your story, i started crying! can’t speak for you natalia, but i wrote a very long letter to my married man as i wanted him to understand how painful my position was and how it was tearing me apart. to know he got in his own bed, without another woman naked too next to him that night just highlighted all that was wrong seeing someone attached. being in love with a married man has made me want to close myself off to all men but i feel in my heart there is someone out there for me. don’t beat yourself up on that, if married men didn’t withdraw the way they do, we wouldn’t need to be so over the top in our pursuit of them. am also married my marriage has been unhappy for the last two years and i know that’s not an excuse. i wish i could get him out of my life but it’s so hard…he said he will divorce his wife but he is still legally married to her till now…. he broke up with me so many times, one time he said i’m a flirt, another i’m lying to him about not sleeping with my husband (i was), he doesn’t trust me…. and it’s hard to move on from a married man unless you totally cut him out of your life. 15 years ago we were both unmarried, my then boyfriend kinda not really now husband was a heavy drinker. the next day i felt soo guilty and tried to stop it immediately as having an affair with a married man is a mistake and didn’t reply to him or even speak to him for a week, but he was very persuasive and convinced me to give this relationship a shot as there was nothing between him and his wife. also, texted a woman from an online game site a few years back. i know that this – not being with a him or any other man who is not mine – is the best best decision for me. did this with married man of 3 years and when i broke up with him i almost felt nothing ! because i’ve moved on from my married man once in life and was great then fell back years later when we worked together again. it can help to remind yourself of the reasons why it may be time to end the affair as you prepare to have the break up conversation with the married man. this man has been married for 24+ years and has had several affairs that i personally didn’t find out about until later. man has robbed me of my life the last 11 months. my married man still wants to be with me…but he doesn’t give me the same attention he used to…so im like why do you still wanna be here? i cannot believe how many women out there have gone/going through the same thing with married men! he was manipulative at times, controlling at times, selfish very often, and always turned things around on me. manipulating me to stay with him longer, and longer, and longer, for nearly 5 years. we both are married, i have a young child as well. felt the same with my married man but i even met him when i was married! a week went by and he texted me that he can’t live without me and that i’m truly the only woman that he loves. i am a smart woman…a business owner…i have raised 3 college graduates…i am no fool…but when it comes to this relationship i am lost! 4 days i’ve finally talked to my married man but from me texting him. but, hearing stories of woman that continue to see the married man, i just could never do. the man you are talking about seems very controlling and probably abusive. give an example, he one time questioned his wife if she was “seeing” anyone else after he found a message from another man on her phone. started seeing an attached man (almost 4 long years now) and i was chased and chased every time about 4 months down the line when i tried to end it. the truth of what’s behind our addiction to these men, which they “need” us to believe is “love”, is his lies, his deceit, his deflections, his manipulations, his gaslighting techniques, his word games, his silent treatments, his blame-shifting, his betrayals, his future-faking, his facade! because of many factors, they have many outside interests, and don’t share outside passions or interests. i’m afraid that every man i meet i will compare to my married man and i’m afraid i will push them away. now i see that no matter how good they are and how sweet and good man they are. yes he is the most incredible man i have ever met, but, he also isn’t the most honest either so that kind of cancels the good bit out! he was supposed to come over so many times so that we can talk and he could tell me his plans and what’s going on but each time, he delays and delays and ends up cancelling which kills me. i was in a 7 year long distance relationship with a married man and 7 years ago i broke it off. what type of man of father does that to their child?! he has actually stopped me dating in the past, now he understands, but of course he does, he is running out of lies to keep me! once you have stated your intentions to end the relationship, be firm about your decision by rejecting any excuses the married man may use and walking away if he tries to persuade you to change your mind. this man is not worth my time and yet here i am missing and wanting him. many of us have tried many times to break things off and don’t succeed at first, second, 3rd, 4th or even 5th time tries and the reason is because there’s an addiction that has to be broken through education and extreme help (therapy and prayers). you’re here because you want to be free of the guilt, shame, and self-loathing that accompanies cheating with another woman’s husband. have bonded with him so it will take time to detox from him that is exactly what you must do you are young do not waste your youthful years with this man he will never leave because he will not leave the money he has built why should he get the best of both worlds! am also dating a married man for one year 2 months. he says when i was ready to go further with us he wasn’t and when he was i already married. a friend of mine introduced us but she wasn’t aware he was married.“you will find that when you see the blessing in the darkness, many other blessings will also come to light – new support, new dreams to be fulfilled, new ways to connect to your divine inner guidance and god-given worth. i agree with you not all married man are monsters and intended to hurt us in the start but in the end we all get hurt and has to carry on with the guilt, shame, disappointment and bitterness for i don’t know how long.. we’re back dating each other (secretly of course) for the past year now. but you will managed, you can’t believe it now but you will. you are right…we have always been the 2nd option to the married men. have been seeing my married man for three years now. i know i have to end this affair with a married man and focus on my healing.
The reason why men marry some women and not others -these are cowards , if they truly don’t or can’t leave their wives get a prostitute and quite ruining good decent emotional woman’s lives. dump that married man and live your life and find your own happiness with a guy for whom you will be a center of his universe. anybody ever thought maybe the reason why these married men become distant is because they’re seeing other women? married men develop a staggering degree of detachment to you and your pain, and they do not budge from their comfort zone to give you even a smidgeon of relief. you’ll find several readers who are honest and strong enough to share what it’s like to date and break up with a man who is married. relationships with married men are so painful, even if it starts off seemingly innocuous and fun and both parties “agree to the terms. advice sometimes we have to learn big lessons in our life and it sounds like you have, good for you for recognising this, i am super used by the amount of men who prey and are looking for a fling probably says more about their own personal character, sometimes us woman are to blame because we so desperately want to hear the words from a living man we become blindfolded and let him in so easily, they really don’t have to try very hard? it’s not necessarily the woman he’s married to. we had this shared blog, and i wrote him so many times, i sent him offline messages. i’m now on my first full day of zero contact with my married mam. you’re a strong woman and i believe in you! the way these married men love you is just not enough. i found out that if a man really wants to be with me then they would move mountains. think about how you were before the married man and during the affair. and this is the problem with us women, we are empaths and caring people, we may go in thinking we want what the man wants and that we can handle it, but we can’t., chasing and having sex with people you know are married or you are the married person in pursuit of the liaison the why is a huge question to ask yourself.'ve been dating a married man for almost 6 months now and am in love with him.'ve been dating a married man for almost 6 months now and am in love with him. he’s been with his wife for 23 years but married to her 16., it was incredibly hard for me too, to believe such negative thoughts about a man i had given every ounce of my heart and soul to. let us know how you get on…make those demands…give him a deadline and in the meantime stop trying for a baby because your child deserves 2 parents or at least a father who is not in denial. at times, i still find it shocking how everything turned out and i may never fully understand how any human being can cause so much anguish in another person’s life. i’m a married woman having an affair with a married man. i was going to end it when he told me he was married and gave me his sob story. married guy i chose to get myself involved with was an old high school friend. started seeing each other 8 months ago, it was always to be sex and he said he couldn’t make me any promises that was the mantra of our relationship. left a beautiful wife and child, got divorced, and married the gal he was running with. i miss my married man so much it hurts, the worst pain ever, yet he can laugh and joke like we never existed – we go to the same gym. i cannot get over the disbelief of how much a man can change, how he can just cut you dead and go on with his life, and you start questioning all the things that you ever shared together. i’m not even sure i can truly recover enough from this to ever be with another man but i can be on my own and with my kids no problem. but this one more time never really end, and thus starts the dynamics of breaking up and getting back together again which is the the hallmark of affairs with a married men and so detrimental to our self worth and peace of mind. he only cared for me as long as i was in his safety bubble of narcissism, those little gifts were in his safety net of not getting financially caught, he did the max he could to keep me nearby, interested, romanced, somehow that made him feel like the macho man. i met him on a dating site and we become couple after a month plus. as much as they say they love you, no man who truly loved a woman would put her through hell like this. if you think for once that that man doesn’t think about you you are very mistaken.’m a little love sick over him but know he is a nervous about us so is still on the dating site, and tbh he does need someone a little younger and that is all i’ve gone about – his age. told my married man before that i knew he didn’t love me – mainly to see how he would react or say – he said well the sex is the best that i’ve ever had and i ain’t stopping it now. do not go back… the problem (married man) cannot also be the solution. i wasn’t this woman who could separate my feelings this way. i have been seeing a married man for 9 months and no one knows. recently after a 2 year relationship broke off a relationship with a married man. i had a talk with my bf who is married with kids that i decided to do the right thing and breaking him up. to break up with a married man and heal your heart. but im still sad, im sad because i will never get to be with my soulmate- my married man, the one who my heart skips a beat for. if you are anxious or uncertain about whether or not it is the right decision to break up with the married man, it may help to make a list of the reasons why the relationship is not working. once you have the baby, the grip this man has on your psyche will lessen., it literally kills you they will manage to live without you even after to have done so much for them. am praying i can end my relationship with my married boyfriend. are my thoughts too, we have husbands that love us & i know if he ever found out about my married man i would lose it all and cause so much hurt in the process to my kids, my husband. to ensure you are understood clearly by the married man, focus on “i” statements, such as: “i feel that you are not committed to our relationship and i am not comfortable being the other woman,” or “i think we should end our affair. feel sane finally, after reading this post……i can’t cope physically pr mentally anymore with the rollercoaster that is my ‘fake’ relationship with my married bf…. when i am upset or need support and i am not all fun and laughs and romance, he treats me with silence.) i tried so many times to cut off with him, so many times i told him its over n we wud spend days without being in contact, but i realized that i m stuck in a swamp, the more i try to get out of it, the more i sink deep inside! even though i sleep over at his home and sometimes we vacation together, i want him to say i will put you before any other woman.! i am new here and involved with a married man, but hopefully not longer. but my husband hadn’t touched me for many years even though i begged him to please get help, to no avail. what a dream after being tangled up in a pointless love triangle for so many years. didnt say anything – except that we did the right thing and that he wouldnt stand a chance with me as long as he is married, as i deserve so much better than just being an affair. i am married with three young kids and have been seeing amarried man on and off for 5 years. see we affair partners make waves, we want changes, we make demands and have expectations. they don’t see us as human beings, and they sure as hell don’t treat us like humans. i’ve invested 3 years of my life falling more and more in love with this man.. i am amazed by the amount of women that are experiencing married men situations. suddenly, having to deal with his less-than-mediocre married life has become less bearable than having to deal with a whiney side object. i was vulnerable because i had not gotten over my divorce and jumped straight into this toxic relationship with my married man. of course he had no idea that i had been seeing a married man. i know he loves me, he’s cried so many times about the situation, but i believe if you really genuinely love someone you’ll do almost anything to be with them…marrying someone else is going to guarantee we’ll never be together. please protect your hearts ladies…married men are quick to steal our hearts and leave us in ruins! i can almost scream at the top of my lungs because so many of the women on this site, are in denial and completely brainwashed and just don’t want to believe what i’ve been saying for months is true. yes, they can play happy families and happy married couples – but the fact they had you ladies means there was something wrong in their marriages, something was missing there and you were providing them with what was missing. i am married with a wonderful husband and 2 beautiful kids. i’m sure most of us can relate to when we were not even close to being in a position to thinking about another man, let alone going out with one!, im in a relationship with a married man for almost 6 years now a have a son with him and our son he is 3 years old , we are working at the same place so he decided to move in with me and now i really want to break up with him coz it doesn’t assist me anymore plz help me to out of this mess. he was crying and saying am the one he loves because for years he has not gone to africa to see this wife ,yes he cares for me and our child but i can’t live with some man who lied to me, almost getting married to me and he still cheat on me with other women on facebook and all. just confused, i dont know if he needs time to think or if its another woman. i have been noticing all of his lies, his manipulations and his disappearing acts on weekends, holidays and leave. came across this website while seeking help how to break free of a mess i found myslef in… im 27, and i have started to fall for a married man who works in the same company. he loves his wife and has stated it many times. just last week, when we were together someone texted him, a woman. just know how you as a woman would treat a man that you truly believed was the one… more than likely we wouldn’t let them just walk away. i changed my attitude towards him we got closer , i let him move in my room lol, we just got super cool & i thought to myself like this too good to be true, he has a great career, not bad looking to be 42, tells me he has a daughter , & a house in texas, i said if u not married your gay, he denied being married for another month or 2, finally wen were were drunk coming from brunch heading home to cook for our friends i got it out of him, he married❗️ it’s my fault cus i should’ve broke it off then (i’ve never dated a married man), but he was like my only person who supported my decisions, & i just felt like he has my best interest in things, didn’t break it off so we lived together for 6 months whom he was here working, motivated me to get back in school, work etc got me back on track, but i’ve been feeling depressed since he left 3weeks ago❗️ i’m getting better but we are fading away, i know i deserve better & today i plan to just loose all contact, we said we were going to text & talk everyday but he slipping up! i’m supposed to go on a vacation with my married man next weekend.’t accept this married man’s phone calls, text messages, facebook popups, emails, facetime prompts, tweets, blog comments, or notes at work. do things you couldnt while you were seeing the married man.! i am just 20 and u got involved with a married guy who was working with me. i’ve been single since i was born abd never been involved with a man until my married man. i have started dating again and although i feel lost and odd, after 3 years of being alone, it’s nice to say i’m off out tonight on a 2nd date with a single (younger too! your man became distant as soon as he slept with you, it’s horrendous behavior but i guess it’s common enough. i know my married man loved me truly and during the time together, i couldnt complain any bit about how he treated me, we were in love head over heel. the moment you feel your married man is dicking you around, break up with them. may you see how valuable and worthwhile you are, and know that you deserve to be loved by a man who is 100% committed and available to you. i have discovered on this website that we are so many some days we are better than others, but right now what is important is to not go back and get strenght back..hes quite elder to me, father of a kid & married for over 10 yrs now. married man feels like to meet the most beautiful, perfect man for you. it’s amazing how they can be so manipulative to get their way.’m curious how long you have been in no contact and how you ended things permanently? i’m 19 years old and i am involved with a married man. yes, i miss the married man but i miss the man i used to know. he’s a facade: you know enough about him to give you some insight into his personality and life, but you’re not involved with the real man. i always made fun of women who dated a married men.: cheating husbandshow to break upleaving a man you loveletting go of someone you lovelong term affairstoxic relationships. i come on and read the stories every time i feel down about him, it makes me realize that there isn’t such thing as a loving, special or fairytale ending when you are involved with a married man. i don’t like the fact they are still married and i feel he still my be involved with her.. i’ve been dating this guy for over ten months now but we just broke up, he lives with his baby mama and they have a one year old daughter but he made me understand he is about to separate from her and that they stayed together because she got pregnant but that i should be patient for the baby to grow up a little . getting involved with a married man has taught me so many valuable lessons; however, i will never do it again. so i’m the other woman and i’m being cheated on.’ve been involved with a married man for almost 10 months. i will see him in a few weeks at a competition that we are both part of, and i only hope my team destroys his, and maybe he will realize it’s not cool to leave a wake of broken hearts when he, like me, just needs to man up and fix or end his marriage. when a married man says ” i feel stronger for you than my wife” but does nothing to prove that please! that said, i’m going to post this link:And hopefully it will bring insight to many of you looking for help and/or wondering why. i learned through my situation that the married man can learn to make his way back in even when you think it’s done forever, so it’s something to prepare for in order to not fail. we would share stories (he was cheating before with other women), and he would even give me advice on my failed romances. thus, if you are with a man who cheats on his wife for years, he is abusing his wife and thus he is disordered in some way. we may hate the wife because we are in competition with her for her husband, but believe me she is just an ordinary woman like us with dreams and aspirations and faith in this man she is actually unfortunate to be married to. married man texted me right away after we met and we texted everyday since. if you’re anything like me, i use to think, “god, this can’t be who my married man is because he was “always” so loving and good to me”. but yes, most of these married men are thinking about you and are unhappy.’s been 3 days since i’ve talked to my married man. i do believe there is truth to what your married man and my married man have told us, i also think we need to remember that they have not honored their commitment of “for better or for worse”. this man wasn’t able to give you this attention all the time because he was married, but i am sure that there is another man for you that does. i think it was just, like all the rest of these attached and married men, they deny a normal life at home but it’s exactly what they have, and why we get pathetic little breadcrumbs. my reader kay broke up with the married man she was having the affair with, she experienced deep grief and heartache. the potential in reflecting on your own marriage and deciding if you can love that man again. a lot of it, and it’s up to you to manage how much i can handle at once. are helping married men cheat on their wives…what if we were in the wives place…i most certainly would not be able to handle it…. isn’t it astounding how this scenario has so many common features, behaviours, and patterns throughout most if not all of the mm relationships ? however, i wouldn’t be where i am today without my many prayers to god being answered in little ways and i know one day with all the hard work i put into finally caring for myself, i will be given what i truly deserve in this life and that is a real true love all my own, even if it’s just from me to myself. you can’t because you’ve made future plans with this man, he’s promised you so many wonderful things, he gives you a love like you’ve never known in your life … but, and this is the biggest and worst but ever … none of it is real. how many of us grew up with strong morals, faith, happiness, and are also the last people in the world anyone would ever suspect would be in this situation?, the workplace, as well as church and online dating are some of the most popular places narcissists like to target and entrap their victims. maybe there is a chance that your married man isn’t a narcissist, but based on what we’ve all been through on here, i doubt it. have tried to end it so many times with my married man, even during the time things were great.
i started about 18 years ago when i was involved with someone myself (not married – just living together) for 7 years. though it can be emotionally trying to break up with a married man when you still have feelings for him, it is important that you prepare yourself for the break up conversation and that you express your desire to end the relationship as clearly and effectively as possible. one day i agreed to go out with him for drinks in the evening as i had finally gotten divorced and that eve after tooo many cocktails we ended up kissing and then having sex. am also in love with a married man and i don’t know what to do. i completely understand his thought process and i know this is the type of man he is, but as i told him, i can’t just keep waiting indefinitely.’s been really helpful to read your experiences, they’ve given me strength to stick to my guns and cut ties with the man i’m in love with. we are in dysfunctional relationships but not every married man having an affair is promising their left arm to someone. in january 2016, i finally managed to put an end to sleeping with the married guy. a few weeks after this happened, another married man (let’s call him fred) came to me (i don’t know what the hell it is that i do that attracts married men and i wish i did so i would stop doing it! i was all alone that night, i tried callin this man but he was with his wife that night so obviously didnt answer. i have my ex-married man blocked, but sometimes unblock him so to see if he has is last online status shown. after not seeing the married man for about 10 years (i broke it off) i started seeing him again because my partner passed away. love yourself and you will learn and understand that you’re more than a man who wants you because he’s not confident enough or man enough because of his problems since childhood. things with my married man and i were simply just physical. i haven’t had news from my married man since a month. am currently dating a married man and i need to cut off all tires with him after reading all these mails it so true the only way is to block him so you have no tires at all with him his promises i cannot deal with any more i deserve so much more than this really i do thanks for all the emails on this website made me decide its not worth waiting. he tells me he is not happy at home and the only reason why he is staying married is because of his kids. so many of us pass years in this fog, getting more and more involved until it just tips us over the edge. she believes that married men are weak, that they don’t have the strength to choose you even if their heart wants to, for whatever reason. he done many things for his wife which i only found out last week. this is the second time i reconnected with my married man, the first was 35 years ago. told my married man when breaking up with him – that i deserve so f***ing much more than he is able to give me. and the last girl he dated, he slept with her just a few days before he got married. i worked with a married man for yrs and became involved.! i don’t need any man or any person to treat me like that.! of course my guy said he never did but honestly i would not want to be married to a man like him if you think about it. no one knows about me, even though i saw his son many times on facetime. that i’m not enough i feel so stupid… he tells me the only reason he’s doing it is because he wants a sibling for his son his son will always come first because he will not loose him he’s not doing it for his wife but i’m not studip and i’ve said this to his face i don’t believe that bs reason, any way back to the advise i’m just trying to figure out how will i survived doing no contacts but having to see him at work everyday also people at work kind of know about us and i’m worried about them laughing at me typical stupid woman gets used, he gets to walk around being the big boss the one that gets what he wants and i’m the stupid laughable woman that put myself in this situation. just broke up with a married man after 3 months and he was my business partner too. i need to forgive myself because i was such an idiot to love a man like him, but i believe time makes things work. you for being here, and sharing how difficult it is to stop dating a married man. its been 2 days i sent my married man the breakup mail & i was feeling so relaxed & free that day, he replied saying u have gone mad n u cant stop me from loving you.'ve been dating a married man for almost 6 months now and am in love with him. how could a man live in a world with no love, or intimacy? i know many are scared that they won’t connect with someone like they did their married men, and even i have that fear sometimes, but i have faith and believe it will happen. why do you leave the door open for the married man? lost my kitty and my dog in the same year, and like you, i realized this man could not be there for me in any capacity. i was resentful at happy families too, or i look at every married guy like a cheater, i am thinking “he is cheating for sure”. tomorrow marks one month since i ended things with my married man and while i do miss him so much every day, i am doing better than i thought. over an affair with a married man won’t happen overnight.’ve put off having children because i am so deeply involved with this other man and so afraid to lose him. i know i love this man but i can’t leave my husband now, and my family will completely disown me. my readers are discussing how difficult, painful, and destructive it is to keep hanging on to an affair with a married man. he was my manager at work and due to the nature of the business he was in i had met and spoken to his wife and kids many times. i’m not sure what hurts worse blowing me off after 10 years in this relationship where i have given this man everything from my heart to my mind to my body in a five minute phone call or the fact that he would rather stay with a woman that he’s told me on several occasions that he loves her but doesn’t like her. today marks two weeks since i ended things with my married man and today is truly the worst day of my life. the thing is, this man, he was engaged when we met. we shared some many things in common and he opened to me about his past and i opened to him for the first time in my life..There is no future with a married man wishing all the time. my cousin had an affair with a guy who was much older and married for 20 years, 1 child, her teen twins…she fell pregnant and he still didn’t leave his wife…9 mths pregnant she sits outside his house in her car until he left for good…it worked. i am 38 years old im married but my husband is gay thou he is in denying it to me all the time. have been together for 4 month and then i cut it, now one and half months have passed from my break up with the married man. he is another woman’s husband; he stood in front of his family and friends and vowed to love her forever. the guy who will truly love you one day will make you feel like the best woman in the world, not make you lose yourself and cry harder than ever. i put my foot down and said hats it i’m telling her -you’re my man. your mm won’t cut ties as he is still using you mentally, just like my attached man. during the time i knew him and when i was single, i held myself back from dating other people because i never felt a connection like the one i had with him. they stay married because they have built a life together and it would totally be a mess if they split up. i know that sharon and many other women gave me much needed strength, and i am so grateful for that. have deleted him from my life,Kelly, leave the married man now. it’s been over a month since my married man decided to cut contacts with me.’s so ironic that for almost 24 years i was saving myself for the right person, and of all people, i had to relinquish it to a married man. i tell myself a thousand times that i don’t want to be the other woman. dated a married guy for 9years…with him promising me marriage etc. i am also confident in the fact that the day i come across a good man, i will appreciate him.’s so insanely crazy how these married men have caused so much damage without us even knowing it at the time? can relate to your story on so many levels, it’s like all these married men give us the same lines and we still continue to be suckers for them. left him because i said i no longer wanted to be with a married man. i’ve left married man many times but the longest was 4 days. to single men, there are thousands and many nice ones. it’s a huge mistake – destructive emotionally, spiritually, physically, socially – to have an affair with another woman’s husband. was scared of dating, and he has gone ‘cold’ since, not in a horrible way, but he is a little confused as i’ve turned him down for 6 years, i feel like a besotted teenager and except for checking my phone still to see if the am has been online checking for messages from me – i’ve not given him one thought really as this young guy has captured my attention and heart. need to find some way to get out…this man is only thinking of himself…no phone, friends go some where even living in the street is better then the situation ur in… you left home at 18, do u have family members? yes, he works loads, but, he find a few hours for football matches during the season and i’m sorry but nothing is stopping him see his friends maybe every other saturday evening for a few hours (he manages the local pub for a few hours many times a week, he claims his escape and so he talks to people as he doesn’t talk to his gf he has a child with and works with 10 hours a day (! however, he was married and although it is a loveless, sexless marriage it worked. am a well educated woman as well, i don’t think you have to be smart to avoid a married man, i think we have to love ourselves more. i am at day 5 of nc and it is probably the hardest day thus far…but i do see glimmers in the mirror of the woman i once was…strong, confident, at ease, calm,peaceful (because i am not waiting to hear from him every second of my life anymore) i have begun to look at my role in this relationship and found that i have been looking for someone to fix me…so i am learning to fix me and be there for myself first! i know that he’s married i know that he’s comfortable and i know that he would never leave his kids but i also know that i was not the first affair he’s had on his wife but why stay and be unhappy and lie for the rest of your life instead of telling the truth and being happy and if he’s really chosen to make this decision to stay with his wife or his wife to stay with him how do i get over this hurts how do i begin to heal after 10 years of loving the same man? you thought your affair with this man wouldn’t turn out this way. created you to be a partner for a man who wants to spend his life with you, and who treats you with love and respect. just a note, my mm has told me many times in the past that he and his wife had gone to counseling years before we got together, but they eventually stopped going after they both felt like it didn’t do either one of them any good. i told my married man that i wanted to be there and he got mad.’s impossible to have a healthy relationship with a married man. the other thing that helps with staying away is that we won’t have the chance to let someone walk into our lives who will be free to love us unconditionally unless we stay free from married man…texts included. i never realised that having an affair with a married man can be such a similar experience, whatever the circumstances and whoever may be involved. the comments below about breaking up with a married man. then, i learned on this site many others went through the same thing..funny enough, i called an ex colleague who lives in germany who i haven’t talked to in months, ended up letting her know about my mm.. going into this i knew he was married and i knew it was wrong and i expressed that to. changed my job and he said it won’t change anything between us but no more communication, nothing i could meet him maybe every two months for an hour,He made an excuse that he’s busy all the time and i was the one always understanding, till almost one month ago we had a plan to meet each other but he said he has something to do and try to manage time to be with me also, anyway it didn’t happened again and i was upset this time when he asked i said i canceled my medical appointment because i wanted to be with you and then he stopped talking to me! i have been with a married man for the last 12 months. i know he (being what is considered a greater narcissist) knew exactly what he was going to do and how he was going to manipulate me into turning my own world upside down. there are so many things this man gave to me that i absolutely want in a relationship and i know i deserve, but because of that, i also know now that i will never settle for less than being someone’s number one! i feel especially heartfelt for those of you who had a married man who treated you like a princess because it makes it harder to move on versus someone who is a complete jerk. the bottom line is you’re being abused (emotionally brainwashed and manipulated) and so is she. my married man couldn’t bear it if i so much as scratched myself or bumped my head but now i think he won’t even blink if i drop dead at his feet. yes, i miss him and yes i get lonely but i keep coming back to this site and reading about the pain and heartbreak and i don’t want that anymore…i wish you great happiness with the right man. he gets jealous if i even talk to another man at work but he can flirt and talk to any women he wants to and i shouldn’t comment. what does he need to inform you about the weather when we have so many media outlets that can keep you informed. off all contact with him, for he is another woman’s husband. the main reason why i blocked my married man from my phone is because i knew that i was deserving of a relationship that was not secretive and based on lies. it’s very comforting to know that i am not the only one going through this, as for the longest time i felt so alone and felt like such an awful person for being involved with a married man. my biggest fear has been that i won’t meet someone who i connect with in the same capacity because i, as well as many others, feel our married men are/were our best friends and soulmates., never fall in love with a married man… this is just a game to them… learn to play the game…. like most of you, i too was having an affair with a married man. somehow i remembered i got married, had children and told him he had the wrong house. i have been involved with a married man for almost 9 years. and no married man deserves to be given all the love that comes from a good, beautiful, caring woman, especially if it’s not his wife. i would end up spending years of my life with a man who in reality is never going to leave. i’m in a much better place now (time is a good healer, i’m in the ‘shock’ stage, not the shock of not being with him, but all the lies, manipulation and at some points nastiness to get what he wanted over the years…. i spoke to my married man after 10 days of no contact. we spend so many days and nights together which makes so hard for me to let go. time flies and as a woman we don’t have so much waiting time for mm. it’s his manipulation tactic to try and draw me back in, and i see right through it. he is having his cake and eating it too, enjoying both the married life (with his wife) and the single life (with you). struck a cord in my heart because he reminded me what it was like to actually be the only woman, even for that evening, that was a part of him…no wife or gf at home. i quit looking at my married man’s wife’s account because it’s all fake. i’m waiting until i feel the time is right to tell them what i’ve been doing… or perhaps one day one of these men will catch me with the other man and the problem will sort itself out. he said he has get a lawyer to divorce his wife but on the other hand i keep seeing his wife fb putting the married status. i dressed up for this man like never before, bought lingerie, talked about interesting topics, followed politics, etc. married man was a very decent person, he was so good to me for eight years that words would fail me if i tried to describe it. i am a strong, resilient 51 year old woman, but this situation has brought me to my knees, literally. i originally posted a couple months back when i was feeling sad and lonely due to a change in my married man’s behavior. if a man truly loved you, he wouldn’t put you through this!. the universe gave us many signs during our friendship, but we ignored them and carried on. recently i’ve had some very honest conversations with my friends about dating married men, and i’ve realized that affairs are more common than i realize. men are human lol, they can and probably do have feelings for us but remember: more than likely there was someone before you and will be after you. this point, i honestly can’t say whether this man truly loved me or not, but i can say without hesitation and doubt that i do love myself and i am getting stronger by the day. i never, ever thought i would end up with him because he was married, but i knew if i had such strong feelings for him, i could not be with my boyfriend any longer. i am in the same boat i meet a man 18months ago at the time i didn’t know he was married has time went by he told me he is a carer for his wife and nothing more and now he’s doing slot more stuff with her and i need out but can’t do it i have no will power am getting very depressed x., a few more things to add and hopefully you’ll consider … the loving words a mm tells you is a form of manipulation and brainwashing and this is why it’s so damn difficult to cut ties from him. marries man said he wants to grow his children that’s why he stays (lame excuse really).
. my ex married man left his work like 2 yrs ago cause he didnt want to continue there and my dum quite the job too. no man is worth it (nothing in life is either). met a wonderful man four years ago who wound up asking me out. he still denies it today that they live as man and wife but when i ask to see the divorce papers that were signed a few months ago he refuses and he refuses for me to meet his son. i agree that the married men are not happy, which is why they wander. this man who is in front of me is a stranger and is nothing and no one to me anymore. spending quality time with family and friends, away from the married man, can help you gain perspective on the relationship and remind yourself that you have other meaningful relationships in your life besides the affair. so all this bs of them leaving us alone no contact is just a way for them to emotionally manipulate us. i know, chances are, many of you don’t think the narcissist applies to you or your relationship (i was there … i know how you feel), but please just read the link below because it may just save you many years of unnecessary heartache and deep (usually incurable) pain. i’ve asked him so many times to just “break up with me” but he never does – and this keeps me hooked and in love with him. as someone who is/also dated a married man with 2 kids i can totally relate. this man did not have the guts to marry the girl he says he loved. he knows it and you would think a decent human being would not want to hurt you that way. i wish i had never participated in this lie to myself and to another woman. i used to go on this roundabout with my married man also, the jealousy and the hurt and the wife sticking to him all the time.’re dating a married man because of something that’s missing and broken inside of you. i always took pride in my relationship because my husband is an awesome man. i hope you find the courage in you to block this man from your life and open yourself up to the potential of meeting someone who will be available to you, and will treat you like how you should be treated. stumbled across this page last night on my way home from work and it has been so helpful to read everyone else’s stories and to not know that i am the only woman who had an affair with a married man. and in another section here, from sharon…if married men wanted to leave they would, no ifs and no buts and no blaming the kids/money/business and so on. i always see him as such a good person, he never promised me anything, he said i should go many times because he loved me and did not want to hurt me. i was obesessed and almost crazy during the months that passed, chasing him, nagging and demanding answers and explanations from him, acting out. i first found this site, i thought the exact same way, but i did convince myself my relationship with a married man was different, unique, not like all the stories i had read all over the internet. and yes, there are jerks and assclowns, and there are nice decent men who just happen to married. and even if life may not be romance and roses, it doesn’t really give you an excuse to stray. ive been there and we tried many times to break up but didnt work until his wife found out about us the 2nd time. my married man ended it with me a month ago. is so true, because even though we want to be with our married men full-time, we all know deep down, he would eventually do the same thing to us too! we have gone nc many times , last one lasted 3 months. ladies why do we find these relationships so intoxicating and give so much of ourselves and our loyalty to a man that not only does not deserve it but also probably doesn’t have much concept of it! and your purpose is definitely not to satisfy some man who isn’t willing to change his life for you right now, no questions asked. and make you end up feeling sub human and less than, to be treated like this. don’t do it to capture him, don’t keep it expecting anything more than man feeling cornered into a decision., if there’s anything i can say that will help, it’s to tell you to stop looking for love from a man who cannot and will not give it to you, the way he’s promised to do so many times. how long does it take to get over a married man? this married man likes having his wife at home and you as an extra perk on the side. you need to go no contact now because this man will destroy your life and steal your soul. the harder it’ll be to break up with this married man and heal your broken heart. it’s been horrific, i don’t live near family or many friends, he has it all, promised me the world and delivered nothing. but they are so many people around, he is just one out of so many you can meet, work, friendships, support.’s married, which might add chemistry and excitement to your affair. we were in close contact even though many miles apart. just feel so stupid but i’m not strong enough to let go of this married man… he treats me like crap and i know it. my married man broke up with me four times in the last two years, although he doesn’t really call it break up. it was definitely hard for my married man to get me entangled in this mess. how many of us are actually professionals trained to make that label? prioritizing your career and your well being over the needs of the married man can help you to feel empowered and stable on your own. the married man i’ve been having an affair with – it’s been 16 years and a child together although he wasn’t married then. had a affair with a married man for the past 3 years. i was dating a man for 5 months and only after breaking things off with him (something didn’t feel right) did i find out he was married.. i am married, no kids, have an extremely loving husband but still i fell for this married man at work whos quite elder to me. the absolute turn about that a married man can affect, focussing totally on his family and leaving you wondering whether you ever even existed, is staggering. years with a man i had known from work and became extremely good friends with, for the first 10 years previous to our relationship beginning. there’s something wrong about that sentence because no princess would be kept in the dark and be given such pain by a man. looking back i would have never married him in the first place. all i can say is he was engaged, could have not got married to be with you and yet he did not. ;d ) – this poor other woman in his life deserves better herself. dating a mm is just so frustrating and exciting at the same time right? it’s just been me to pull away from him because of my married man.’ve bought the caravan he and i were looking at buying, they got a new dog, she’s posting on his business page about their romantic trip to paris. you are deep in a relationship with a married man and are trying to figure out how to break it off with him. you need to decide that you deserve more out of a relationship, and that a better man is waiting for you. searching for what your life is missing – and it’s not a married man. i told him he’s married, we live in the same building and i kind know his wife. last month my married man’s wife found a text from me. married man told me everytime we split up he was so depressed he didn’t want to go on, he started trying to find a way to make more money, so he could leave, but i can’t be a part of that. somehow, these married men tend to know how to do that to us and yet, the price is so high. when i was suffering and lonely one day, i really wanted to call my married man but never could, he didn’t use a cell except on rare occasions, and i thought to myself ‘ how insane is this? am with him for one year 2 months and initially i didn’t even know he is married until i met his wife personally in the airport when we were back from a trip.’s been over a month now that my married man ended it and i haven’t reached out. it’s been four months broken up from my nine year relationship with a married man. what i did till i knew how to live without my married man. that you’re not in love with the real man. i don’t think it’s unusual that you’ve endured many arguments and silences. years but i already felt like i’ve known my married man for years. my mm was all the good qualities you can hope for in a man multiplied by a million. always knew being with a married man would be heartbreaking and i was right. i can take a wild guess and say that at least 95% of you on this site are empathic and you’ve been exploited and manipulated. in those 4 months, i was doing counseling with my husband, when he decided he didnt want to go to counseling anymore and got verbally and emotionally abusive, i ran back to this man. many on this website, we understand very well what you are going through. you, i live 8 hours from parents, brothers too, friends dotted around and manage to keep myself busy enough and usually have a flatmate here 3 days a week (my ex-am friend and my colleague funny enough, without his bit of rent, i’d have lost my home too…. i never wanted to be the other woman and i struggled for 4 years with this. “what would you be, without the thought that (married man) is happy without you while you are suffering? i don’t know why i keep sleeping with a man who do not love me. is a key component of narcissism because sex/romance/love are powerful tools to gain fuel from you. i want you to get strong and be the woman you’re meant to be. i have been seeing my married man for over two years now as well and have talked to him every single day. i’m writing because i’m also dating a married man for two years. my story is a little different where a married man took advantage of me. welcome your thoughts on how to break up with a married man. not to him or any other man who’s not mine. this is just one blog hg tudor has from an archive of many and i just felt like it was a good place for you to start. 15 months seems like a short time compared with some, at the same time, 15 months too many. now i think, it’s so easy for him to seduce and manipulate me because he is my boss. my married man and i have had the greatest time together. had been dating for eight months when i met chris. i always judged women who had affairs with married men, and i know people who have never been in this situation who would say i deserve what i’m getting. when we start making demands, the affair becomes yet another struggle they cannot cope with because that is the type of men they are. with my married man almost a year and a half. i have not read all the comments here but seeing that there are so many makes me feel less alone. i now think that any man who can straight up lie to his woman at home is bad news. i took myself off the dating website to give myself a break, but did see my date after 2 weeks on saturday night and again we stayed up until the early hours and had a lovely time. i had an affair for 6 years with this married man i met from work. i think of him everyday i won’t lie, but really i feel so much of a stronger woman that i can move on without him and refocus on me. i may actually see the married man tonight at a party with mutual friends and i have vowed to myself not to allow his presence to alter my mood and even entertain the idea of sleeping with him. be aware though, all of our situations are different and sometimes the married man will come begging you back (hoovering) immediately or like in most cases, they give you the silent treatment for however long they feel like it. am has wasted the most important years of my life, i can never forgive him, my chances of having children are running low at 38 yrs old and i could have spent the past 3 years dating to find the right partner rather than him manipulating me. the last time we spoke he mentioned he was married and had one child. you need to look at taking care of yourself and your child with this man. still don’t know if this is is 2nd wife or 1st wife remarried. i was his friend and coworker, and was even happily dating. swear we’re all dating the same married man…they give us all the love and affection in the beginning…but later on they start to treat us like crap…why is that? be aware that not everything you read in these articles are going to be exactly what your married man does; however, i guarantee a huge chunk of it does. i can be the strong woman i always wanted to be and i will never let anyone treat me as badly as he did. think the married man is so happy to feel again that you become his focus! laurie can you please write an article on why married men cheat…does he really love his wife if he continues to have affairs? she probably is an awesome person, who is unfortunately married to a dick who should be thankful for what he has, but has probably already headed out to find the next poor gal to enjoy the hours of 3:30-5pm with. i have been with my husband for over half my life, married 22. this point, the married man may try to persuade you to change your mind or use excuses he has used in the past. we have no plans to get married; we don't even plan to move to one coast or the other. he says to me i ask too many questions (when i ask what he is doing on weekends etc).. you will manage i promise but you have to do one thing everyday to leave that nightmare. my ex husband and i decided to call it quits after 7 years of being together and 1 being married (he was my high school sweetheart).“to anyone who is still involved with a married man, all i can say is end it now,” she says. it’s been 11 days since i heard from him and the last email from that time said “thank you for being with me and being a sexy beautiful woman…” hate feeling like at this age i am being used…even though i thought i could handle it. a year later married man resurfaces ( there was rare but occasional contact, openly during my marriage) and we decide to meet. i too feel worthless, guess i’m looking for love from a man who only loves me for sex. have been dating a married man for a year now. used to feel like i was the exception with my married man. i was with my married man 2 years and a half.. i try to b strong, everyday i think of ending it with the married man, but when i see his pic on watsapp, i get carried away n numb! single one of us, whether you choose to believe it or not, had major emotional mind games played on us (some still being played), and manipulations that go well beyond normal.