Is dating a guy 3 years older than you bad”well i’ve been doing it for 42 years, but i am certainly willing to entertain the idea that it isn’t the best method. time and circumstance being chaotic, two of those 4 relationships ended before marriage, and one 12 years after marriage. it felt wierd and scary, as though a man who was so much older was deliberately targeting me because he might have felt i was young and naive (vulnerable, but not in a good way) and not mature enough to negotiate a relationship with a man so much older and experienced. younger, more attractive women will refuse to reward men that take the high road and invest in themselves, then that behavior will simply be bred out of men. if you share my teenage (and current) tendencies and decide, after reading all these points, to charge ahead with your may-december romance, no one here is judging you, and i hope it’s a beautiful and positive experience.”if a woman can’t get the attention of men 3.@saino problem if you’re not interested in having kids really.: the “dating scene” strikes me as a bit… i dunno.@ susan walshsounds like the guy i mentioned yesterday, who told me about the constellations and then kissed me.., not some graduate student who doesn’t get why you’re so stoked to be making out with someone since they’ve done it a million times. there are probably guys who wouldn’t mind that, but they aren’t going to get too emotionally invested (why would they?, i think you should go to a speed dating event and tell every guy that you want to married within the next year and don’t want to waste time if that’s not going to happen, so that’s why you are interviewing a lot of guys. though half those interviewed were desperately ignorant people who said there is no such thing as an ideal age difference between people who want to be together, other women were brave enough to put themselves out there and say that they'd even date a man all the way up to a radical seven years older than them. and there is no reason why at 21 you should feel pressure to identify a future husband. – ” it makes me really, really sad to hear that religious people told you that you were “evil”! watched it for free on the internet so you could just watch it right now. young women are somewhat resistant to this idea, i have found. after three years of powerlifting training, i’m at an “intermediate” level per exrx’s strength standards. and then wanting to have you “take care of it” by having sex?, here’s the question: you just found out that she is pregnant with his baby and she is due about 9 months after he proposed…basically, they started fucking like bunnies, without protection, right after he proposed.”no, you’re explaining why she might be guarded, cautious and want to wait rather than get hurt. completely understand that you did not like getting hit on by these fathers, but i am still trying to understand something.” making out and going on multiple dates makes her belong to not girl who wants nothing but to never see you/him again, and the act of making out makes her not asexual, but prudish, yes probably. if you’re a hot young woman who can’t make rent in a studio apartment and puts a premium on having clothes, shoes, expensive purses, and travel to exotic locales, sleeping with ron perelman probably looks like a dream scenario. collect a welfare check with no guilt and while you still can. was the most emo guy i’ve ever known, but to be honest, that was part of his appeal. two different animals entirely”i realize that this may be the case for most college kids you know, but very few of the small number of kids around me that manage to actually go to college leave home to do so. it felt wierd and scary, as though a man who was so much older was deliberately targeting me because he might have felt i was young and naive (vulnerable, but not in a good way) and not mature enough to negotiate a relationship with a man so much older and experienced. as someone else said, guys don’t have a medium between booty call and girlfriend. relationship between gender and suicide has been extensively researched by western sociologists, given that males die much more often by means of suicide than do females, although reported suicide attempts are 3 times more common among females than males. adequately educated as a result of their extended family and sometimes we just do not dating someone 10 years older reddit apply. i would say get comfortable first, get intellectually and emotionally close, and then see how sensual you can get. it will help you get over approach anxiety, will get you used to talking to new girls, some of which you will probably associate with a little bit more and become friends with, possible ltrs, etc. really didn’t mean to offend you, and wish you the best., if you are a size zero anorexic, you are certainly less likely to have womanly curves. interesting thing is that when i saw the photo of her perfect guy, one more time i realised i have no idea what females consider “attractive” in males. and, if you can, look for at least one good quality in each person you talk to. he liked you, but might not be as forward as you think, and didn’t seem to get a vibe that you were really interested, so he chickened out; or.”i think you have this right, just from my personal experience & observation. is always interesting to see girls get that deer-caught-in-headlights look when, after hearing their checklist of things they want in a man, you ask them what they are bringing to the table. is not odd for someone to say it when you’ve been kept apart by circumstance longer than usual. my mother was telling me how a relationship is not as bad as many older men make it look, like because average guys(like the woman’s boyfriend was) can get sex from women, even hot women.”well, if you are a size zero anorexic, you are certainly less likely to have womanly curves. otherwise, you’re living a lie and robbing me of a real opportunity to marry someone who loves me the way you now love the other woman. year old dating is an exclusive way make it work despite. in years that may not be much, but in terms of relative status, social circles, etc. or if they are in relationships, or even dating, no one seems happy.@ramblebrohamlet, how much theater did you do in hs and college? perhaps that is your opinion, but it’s not what susan said.”not to beat a dead horse, it’s just that her sexuality was most valued when she gave it to the bum, and now she wants the most valuable period of the responsible guy’s life. – “that is what i feel like when you post jeremiads about how slutty and awful and unrestricted the way things are today. is odd for someone you’re seeing frequently to say they miss you.@gayatriif a woman needs resources to raise a child she well might look for older men, though.@kendra“this december i am turning 33 and i find it depressing as hell that according to this blog, i’ve reached my peak and basically have nothing to offer to a quality guy who is looking to settle down.’m going to sue you for intentional infliction of emotional distress. because she was a good friend you knew some details about her sex life, like that they used condoms as their protection. i think you are far better off being single than divorced, since things didn’t work out with your xf. you agree that the chances he will succeed with them are slim, because, well, this does not matter what he thinks he is and indeed it does not matter whether he indeed is more valuable when he was 28, because he won’t get much chances to show that to girls in the range he desires? you are a weirdo like me, you can make it a game and give yourself points. actual consumption is more like buying lots of items, wearing them when it suits you, and then returning them. better to marry someone closer in age, because chances are that you will end up spending more time together with the one that you love.’m going to continue to agree to disagree – i don’t think you can prohibit that.” “i don’t know, why don’t you ask lok-ious-the-magnificent., female:male attempts 3:1 success 1:4 (by eye / anecdote / whatever)so that means men are 12 times ‘better’ at suicide than women(? plus, since this is a blog for young women, i don’t see the point of highlighting what i see as bad male behavior. as for those curves, you are on one side, i am on the other.’m going to go against the grain here and recommend the carousel (moderate, carousel-lite version: n<3 rides per year/heavy emphasis on high-smv men/no more than 4 years of active operations) for charlotte. i met my fiance i had early 30`s sniffing around. men that are attractive to young women past 40 take care of themselves, age well, are successful, confident and wealthy. is so wrong about going out @ 21, to see what you like and having fun? 😉 haha do you want me to send you a full-size picture? and for better or worse, you and i are pretty like minded.. never, ever trust what a guy’s friends tell you about the guy.*menb-not judging any side here, just observing that not being close to your family must be a horribly lonely experience.” and, surely, you must understand that it’s weird that she thinks he would brag to his friends (who she barely knows) about taking her top off.”and like i already said, most individual women choose not to marry and have children with much older men.@j“i will occasionally slip in a manosphere trope like, “would you like me better if i were more submissive? haha do you want me to send you a full-size picture? can’t tell you how many people referred to me as “gringa” in a complimentary way when i studied in mexico. didn’t say it was a goal, she said it under the heading of “you never know. about the only to consider would be the greater possibility of defects with the older dad. they breeze in, charm a couple of young pretty ones, have their buddies keep it spinning while they work the room, assess their probabilities, and then either close a deal or ripcord. he's been looking at women for four years and four months longer than all the competition. what’s worth to guys like intj, cooper, etc– i’m 21 and i definitely cannot see myself with a guy in his 30s+. you’re a hot young woman who can’t make rent in a studio apartment and puts a premium on having clothes, shoes, expensive purses, and travel to exotic locales, sleeping with ron perelman probably looks like a dream scenario.*i bet if there was a guy who looked like a carbon copy of him, who was just a regular guy of awesome character who truly loved his family and adored his wife, we’d all be swooning.., a parallel dating strategy when you consider multiple candidates at once, rather than one at a time. you won’t motivate adult players not to get ‘tang. did it in your personal life, so how about doing it here?”lots of young guys don’t step up to the plate until they have a reason to do so. it works out with my boyfriend (who’s a year older) but i would look like a fool in a date with a 30yr old. find the parts of yourself that make you most attractive to them at the stage they’re at, and play those up. they need to be aged exactly 52 months more than you to taste right. whether they like opera, which you didn’t learn early on because they’d never been before.” ie-realize the environment has changed and adapt to it mentally and physically (becuase you have no other choice). now he’s dating once more with an eye toward finding a gf.“why you should date an older guy”for a minute, i thought i had accidently logged onto the askmen forum. it pisses me off when anyone is all about oppressing one group of people for bad behavior but allowing another groups bad behavior to go unchecked. it was only until i was in my mid 20s that i felt mature enough to date more mature men in their late 20s and 30s. the history is fascinating, but it has for 70 years been about making films.’s not coming through at all in any of your posts. the point is that women should expand their options, and dating men your own age or even younger is smart, provided they are looking for the same things you are.'s great in the sackit doesn't matter if you're a virgin or at your sexual peak, only a man who is 52 months older than you can touch you like someone who has experienced an extra presidential term. she said one of the cool and surprising things about being with me is: she has learned more about who she really is in 3 years with me than she learned most of her life.@jackie“imagine a black man saying to me, you are a pretty white girl.@gayatrihere’s the comment i left her (not sure if she’ll allow it since she seems devoid of any sense of personal responsibility in choosing a guy with several red flags waving brightly and boldly in her face; he was a douche for deceiving but come on, have some common sense):“so you had dozens of guys interested in you and you chose the guy in an open relationship with a gf for most of those months before sex? it makes sense, as many young people are in these programs just at the time when they’re thinking about marriage. so at 40, he is most likely to get interest from women 30 and older. 🙁could you explain this:“besides, i was always more of an old testament kinda guy. in attempting to make yourself look highly intelligent, you’ve demonstrated that you can’t read as well as the common howler monkey”well, i think i read pretty well, but your prior post was poorly written (perish the thought). that beer when i get in-country…cheers and likewise for you ‘n’ hubby. changing your environment will at least get you out of the environment where you thought it was hopeless.@detideti, i don’t think hope made your point for you at all.“and a guy invited me to see a concert, that was going to take a 3hr starlit drive though the desert to get there. perhaps in years long gone there were just as many unrestricted folks as there are now, but social pressure kept their behavior in check. you took her innocuous comment out of context and used it as fodder for a personal rant against women., you are the exact opposite of zach, as conversation and compatibility appears not to interest you. if i hear an accent when it is said i’ll ask where you are from, and that has potential to be a really great conversation. i thought i was totally prepared to deal with the daily realities of having a boyfriend who was older than me by a decade-plus, which turned out to be less than correct.@olive:“the other dumped her bf of 2 1/2 years when she went abroad because she wanted to hook up with foreign guys, and was extremely pissed to find out he had a new gf when she came back (as she’d expected him to wait around). that’s why she’s pretty good at advising younger women, she’s been there with the concomitant quasi-transactional attitude. i almost feel like you avoid that kind of stuff. i’ve advised them to set their preference as older, don’t check the box for guys under 25. i had she-cousin which was 30 at the time i saw her first time and frankly, if i wouldn’t be married, i would go straight for her. also conservative, doesn’t sleep with pretty much anyone until a couple months of dating. as your friend’s buddy, your job is to help him get laid (or get the girl, whichever). i guarantee you that if you use it irl you will either get laid…. a guy go all sappy and serious on you right off the bat? no guarantees, of course, as many of them have nothing to their name save a mildly humorous twitter account…but you never know who you might meet! he is just a few years younger than my dad)., you don’t have to know from the start, but you should be able to tell very quickly. but, one of my really good buddies was in theater- this dude made the rest of us look stupid with girls (and my friends were mostly not stem guys or bookworms, we were at the bars every weekend). i am not saying that a guy i meet this weekend at a bar couldn’t be ideally compatible, but how would i really know if i’ve barely had any adult relationships? is this something you see in a lot of men, or just a few that are at the ends of the bell curve of the ones you’ve dated? for a tv show/movie to show a girl being dumped specifically due to weight gain, was your hope right? bringing up the manosphere as if it’s so important, but it’s really not doing you any favors here.. i wonder if the bias of your own past being ‘average’ is clouding your vision on reality? the world is the way it is – not as you want it to be. regardless of your stance on this matter the last line is wisdom that’s pretty hard to ignore. maybe it looked like she didn’t care, maybe she really didn’t care, but the point is that you don’t know the whole truth. like a commentor (i think it was marie) said upthread older men do not compete with younger men, they are in two different categories. was trying to be funny based on the fact that this expisode was clearly unintentional and handled well on your part. this blog is getting definetely better with more female commenters 🙂as for your comment, think about it that way: imagine you have male friend, who is 45 years old. what about a white girl saying, you are such a hot black guy? ironically, women statistically have the best chances of snagging a ltr-oriented guy when he’s in his mid-20s…. keep in mind that the apex of all these charts is not something to wait for; that would be relying way too much on timing, a default approach that i think younger women are finding to be unreliable at best. she may turn out to be a wildcat once you clear her filters for comfort and intimacy”zac, i was just going to say something similar. likewise, when i was single in my ‘30s, i don’t recall fresh out of college women ever going gaga for me when i was fresh out of law school and gainfully employed.) talk to her at some point to see what’s she’s really thinkingif you really like the rest of her and would like her if she were able to open up and be flirty and sexual then try some combination of 4 with 2 or 3. the “math” going forward for women could be: take the # of proms you attended (or were invited to) from hs yrs 9-12 and multiply by 5. and others addressing this point:personally, find a gap of more than ten years problematic. because i came of age pre-internet and blogs were not available to me, i didn’t discover until after i was already married to a man only a year older than me that as an 18-22 i was supposed to be hot for men at least 10 years older than me. two guys behind the deli counter gave me free food!“well, you’ve managed to royally piss off the mras, puas, internet feminazis, and reddit mangina dorks. but it makes sense that a younger woman may have a more flexible and expansive set of “something else” needs/desires than those of a woman of equal age and so many men target accordingly.), and a guy approached me and asked if i wanted to play pool.” “i don’t know, why don’t you ask irare? you’re not explaining why she looks at sex through the prism of a 7th grader. think you’re incorrect about that…i actually watch the mindy project (and bf likes it too! you want “nothing serious” (which seems to be code for monogamy), then have fun around with the players, that’s what they are there for. yeah, but it puts him on the spot and you read his immediate reaction to figure out what’s up.……………………………………………………i went to my favorite bar over the weekend, and this guy started chatting me up. i think many men like you have little interest in very young women. around here you have to earn the right to complain.’t help you (which i doubt you need) but it will be less likely to happen to some other kid in 5 years.’m not picking on your here susan, but you have been pretty honest about your past, and imo it serves as a great example of my confusion: you claim to be restricted, yet you still have some “unrestricted” behavior in your past. as zach said, three dates has become the functional norm by which sexual chemistry needs to be validated, hence this woman’s risk of being summarily dismissed by a young man with many other options available to him. again, i love that you used a story to express an idea. i thought you were on your first serious boyfriend, no? I can't explain it, but it just feels like the universe's chakra has aligned itself correctly for the first time, that everyone on earth is holding hands in a circle and sharing a Coca Cola, that the clouds are parting gently so a ray of life-affirming light can burst through and radiate all over me. you’re probably one of the prettiest colored women i have ever met”. this burning of widows is your custom; prepare the funeral pile. a woman forfeits some male smv if she goes over that, but it’s still worth the tradeoff until about age 35 or so. best simulation games for android that are in the same experience with online dating sites order., but mostly the pissing match between you and plain jane.”how many days did you get up to before you had the hallucinations? seriously, show me an example of this in tv or movies from the last 25 years where a man demands from his gf/wife that she lose weight and he is not shown to be an ass. you’re essentially looking for a fwb situation without the casual sex, which doesn’t really exist. he didn’t promise a life on easy street with tons of chicks and things going your way. is more risk for the older woman beyond 30 to show any waffling. anything less than that is just dating under another label. can you please explain to me what the actual difference is between a restricted and an unrestricted woman other than perhaps how high her n got? on top of that, given your interests, you need to go above and beyond your normal venues in order to meet a guy, much less guys you’re compatible with!’m not sure who you’re hanging out with, but that’s something i’ve never heard in a long lifetime of listening. before marriage, you are not obligated to stay with someone through thick and thin. relationshipyou’d be hard pressed to convince me he asked you out “for fun”.@ramble:” still, were the 3s, 4s and 5s in missouri getting all those dates on the weekend, or was it more something you saw in your (above average) sorority? you consider incorporating yourself as an insurance carrier, i can possibly consider bringing an action against you. a lot of women require trust to really let go and then they surprise you. pompey fights back in 3 misconceptions about men who date a lot of women. manosphere is so toxic that my husband asked me specifically to stop reading it in the first year that we were togetherhope, do you know the scene in the godfather where kay and michael are leaving the movie theater and kay asks michael if he would like her better if she were a nun?’m not sure, but off the top of my head i would assume that means you can go younger, while you might not do as well with women your own age, especially if they look older than you do. imo, three year gap in hs seemed kind of gross, while a 5, even up to 10 year gap between 25 and 35, not so much.’m whatever happens when you inflict spiritual experiences on someone who is effectively a materialist. dating is really good for introverted guys who don’t feel comfortable as comfortable “picking up” a girl at a bar or even a party. agree that there is also the question of what you talk about when you’re a generation apart, but i get the sense that most couples with that big an age difference have different incentives driving them. ”well, your and my version of overweight probably differed from his. i know one woman in her mid 20’s who shackled up with her first serious boyfriend, first guy she had sex with, and she made it clear she’d only sleep with the guy if he moved in with her and played his role as a co-habitation couple. current;y have 234 emails which i’m really not interested in reading. all the more reason to stop shaming men in their 30s who are single. you get a little older, the fun first-timeyness that goes with teenage love dissipates. i recently saw him in something else, playing a bad guy. may stay single for years, knowing that at some point they will find what they are looking for. least i got a positive childhood when i was really young. 🙁intj, is your friend getting enough sunlight (one of those lamps can make a difference)? so he has to go down in age to the 35 and up crowd. was a few years ago and was the first time that i ever accomplished this feat. dating is good, dating is healthy, and dating is no strings. i do think young men often fall into the trap of feeling obligated to a girlfriend such that they feel they are wronging her by breaking up (i know i was that way). for the age thing, you said yourself he probably thought you were older and in your conversations, whether you did it with intent or not, you probably communicated certain things that may indicate restricted, ltr-orientation, etc. when amped up, she becomes 2-3 “points” (as much as i hate to be numeric) hotter. more i look at that picture, the more convinced i am that cigstache is a fat guy with manboobs and rocker hair that he put in pigtails for halloween.”i went and checked the link out because i saw your request, jus. – “it’s clear from your commentary that you want women to be very restricted, in behavior, attitude and desire. there is no way you can discern that without dating them first.@susan“the only guy who liked me was the drug addict who thought i was wholesome enough to save him.@rambleif you haven’t yet had the pleasure…why we shit test.@ bullymaybe i should be flattered that you mistook me for rollo. since i began reading in the ‘sphere, i will occasionally slip in a manosphere trope like, “would you like me better if i were more submissive?., nice stable providers) after the young women are done giving the best of themselves to the hot fuck material is a grave insult. 😛but i would agree that a ltr is several years.”well, the media attention is on the top guys, not the dorks who couldn’t make sense. which makes the timing rather comical to me…)all this talk of 10 years being too much is bs and only applies at the lower end. you are one of the regulars here that i tend to use as a way to judge my ideas by your reaction.. because of the whole potential-incarceration-of-their-partner thing, a teenager may have to hide a relationship with an older person from everyone else in their life. but i haven’t had a hard time dating and finding someone who is interested. an ltr should span at least a few years, and i consider them the ramp up to marriagecrap. he looked like a cool guy who had it all together– the kind who has to beat away the chicks with a stick! want to talk about that situation a little bit more, because it’s another important thing to keep in mind before you get involved with an adult. when i was 18 and a man in his 30s hit on me, i couldn’t understand why that old man thought i would be interested in him.@ted dwell, reading about you being perceived as emotionless in most settings but being quite romantic at heart hits home to me. just hooked up with a guy:He fucked me at the frat house after beer pong. much educated tune place of fear rather than general an attractive older woman dating man 10 years younger dating a woman 13 years older than me man, australia, site for herpes with a short guy who had genital warts and am very worried.@jrd, yes, in manosphere terms i’m “past my prime”if you were interested in being a bar skank, than you might be past your prime, but if you are interested in being a great mother, you are probably riding the wave right now. the difference is, while you seem to concentrate on the “little things” that can be changed quickly to push things in the right direction, i’m more likely to say the whole thing is broke, should be scrapped, and started over.
Dating a guy 7 years older than me - Fiori Fioriyou don’t want to end up with someone who doesn’t make you feel warm and snuggly. the median doesn’t tell us much about trending male attitudes though – we’re most interested in what young men do. even if he does break up, he feels bad and guilty about it.: game of thrones and older womenmy boyfriend thinks that cersei lannister is the hottest got female. charlotte may have lived just 2/3 of her unmarried life so far. you haven’t yet had the pleasure…why we shit testwhy was that comment directed at me. i could go younger than that, five years seems fine but ten seems like a stretch. (because by then, that’s what their view of all the guys with the options have been doing)@susan. i only skimmed the last 10 pages:Whether single women in their 30s represent the optimal strategy for males is another question, and one i have not attempted to answer. sspent most of my 20s telling people how much i hated little kids and most of my 30s trying to conceive them.@ emilybased on the comments around here, you’d think that girls never get dumped. that women’s preferences shift more towards dads than cads as they get older (and incidently less attractive)? if i didn’t have kids, i’d have left years ago. just as awesome, but with a radically different perspective on what happened in middle school, you know? one guy had remembered me from the voting line at the polling place three weeks ago; another guy supposedly had a convo with me in the summer about vacations (?’t take this the wrong way, but that statement made me feel very sad for you. are right about men – as long as they revise their expectations to increasing female age commensurate with their own, they should find dating easier. i wouldn’t be surprised if contact was made in the future, but be prepared for more of the same game and then decide if you are comfortable being part of a harem. new guy confesses he has girlfriend, will break up with her. the upshot is women leave college at their peak smv but men still have five more grueling years of proving themselves before they even approach theirs. you do not show it, but you are developing a strong physical attraction for her. that is, what are you offering that a man would want, not the romcom version of it.: but not if a woman like that is hanging out with an alpha crowd of guys like zach and his pals!. “pretty”, insofar that she seems feminine enough, and she’s cute, and probably the type that a lot of college guys today would love to find but can’t. actual work part of the relationship comes into play when you have to actually do the living together and raising a family, after the love/infatuation stage wears off. as a very restricted person, i’m constantly shocked at how quickly some people feel comfortable getting naked with someone new”you must not consume large quantities of alcohol…. confess i worried about you, intj and the other young guys while writing this – i didn’t want you to feel discouraged.’s a shame, because i believe you have a lot of knowledge and wisdom to contribute, especially as an older person (i miss munson so much 🙁 ). well accustomed site, you’ll see it serious, most stable relationship.?are you being completely serious, or are you being a little silly? otherwise, you’re living a lie and robbing me of a real opportunity to marry someone who loves me the way you now love the other woman. graduate, look for jobs, first one that lands one picks where you both will live. just as you do not owe any woman a relationship based on having had a few dates with her.@susan:“again, to reiterate, i am not suggesting that women stop dating guys their own age. and here you are running them down, essentially telling them they are physically repulsive.“that guy didn’t even let me come up for air.“you’re not explaining why she looks at sex through the prism of a 7th grader. you don’t even allow the small talk with the woman at work. community organizer, 37 what if i am one of those sad sack bachelors hitting on too young women at the bar?’t forget the guy you canned for being dumb enough to fail your shit test and stay up all night doing whatever it was (or maybe that was junior high). are distinctly less exciting and bad ass than you are led to believe by popular culture. their society didn’t have that issue (except in the case of prostitution) because the custom was “you break it, you buy it. i suspect this is at the heart of your unsatisfying results.– and i could be totally mistaken here, please correct me if i’m wrong– but you read to me as a very “bottom line” kind of person. do you have a sense of whether these women followed the usual path of ejecting a high powered career and settling in westchester or fairfield? get enough invisible comments and you start going to too early a page. years older (the female preference), you might want to look at guys a bit older. looking back at that relationship now, seven years later, there are so many things i wish someone had told me before i decided to become the lolita to this guy’s humbert². ”don’t forget the guy you canned for being dumb enough to fail your shit test and stay up all night doing whatever it was (or maybe that was junior high). for you for delivering a quick “no” to the guys you knew you were not interested in. how ltr/marriage maintain the same rules, dating does not.)iow, if a man wants to marry and have a family with the hottest woman possible, he should act when he perceives that his mmv is highest, which may mean partnering with a woman who is 30 or more. while it is true that i tend to address my posts to women in college and just after, i actually have a lot of female readers in the 25-35 bracket.”this was the farthest from what i was trying to say when i said guys only date for two reasons.” with aging maturity, wealth, dominance, ect, you-name-it, there will always, always be better. i gave online dating a try because some of the women i was looking for (those sick of the bar scene) are there. needs to be a manual that expressly notes that hooking up does not automatically mean that you are now bf/gf. to me, if you use online dating as a guy under 25, i feel like you are just cruising for a banging and not looking for anything real.” i have to say, though, it really made me chuckle when you said to hope,“your solipsism is showing.@passerby“well, you’ve managed to royally piss off the mras, puas, internet feminazis, and reddit mangina dorks.“and, surely, you must understand that it’s weird that she thinks he would brag to his friends (who she barely knows) about taking her top off.“my guess is that female fantasies about pinning you to the wall and exhausting you were occurring with rapid fire frequency.. you have plenty of time to date people older than you, but not nearly as much to have a high-school romance., i mean this in the nicest way, racking up your n in search of butterflies and maybe “the one” would be a serious mistake for all kinds of reasons. you are assuming that it is, or at least that is not bad merely that “it is. specifically, what you are seeking and what you hope to gain. for the girls here saying they’d never date older guys because of this and that.”i think everyone with half a brain cell is able to comprehend dating.@susan:“how quickly do you think a person should be obligated to make that decision after meeting someone? 🙁incidentally, this is one of the guys she thinks might be gay., i won’t suggest anyone withdraw from the social scene because they aren’t ready to commit to a marriage, as some of the guys seem to be suggesting. don’t want to be in a situation where you have to compete with your spouse in terms of career/monetary success.” only 24% agree that “your most important personal goal is to get married. she is 8 years my junior, so i think i did pretty good. no one who cares about your wellbeing will seek to do this to you, no matter how attracted they might be to your personhood.“but guys here have certainly criticized women for being slutty and viewed women via a prudish lens”well, that doesn’t include me.[grandgeneralization]my guess is that highly empathetic people do not do that well in the “dating” world.)anyway, to your point… i don’t believe she ever had any intention of being a “kept woman”. – “as someone else said, guys don’t have a medium between booty call and girlfriend. i wonder if the bias of your own past being ‘average’ is clouding your vision on reality?@intjyou know, i would keep a hopeline phone number on hand, just in case, for your friend. guys who are equating marriage to ltr, or ending and ltr to ending a marriage, are way off base. most people i know plan on living in a city (not necessarily nyc) for work for at least a few years after college, and then moving back out there when they settle down a bit more. that’s very different, once your career is established in a particular area, and you might have to take a big career hit, if she wants to make a big move in order to advance. and being told that is your sole value in the eyes of men. you have to try different people on until you find one that is a great match. think when i was younger i had this perception that my life would be over once i hit 40 and the rest was a slow slide into oblivion. i don’t know if dc lawyers can pull young women if they’re high status or what, but she felt like she was being approached by middle-aged dads all the time. we just don’t see or hear about them because it is death as a young man to openly identify oneself as a sexual loser., what is “dating around” going to lead to when the girl knows that she doesn’t want an ltr at this stage and does not want to marry until she been through *at least* 2-3 bfs?”welcome to how most 19 and 20 year old guys felt when you were that age and on top of the world.@pjpuh-leeze lady, purdah is a muslim thing (your sister-religion) and sati is the name of a goddess…. and so this article is gonna focus on the not-so-fun stuff—the things i didn’t know or understand back then, and that maybe you don’t now. of the modern problem is that the transition from fun to work is relatively jarring and means that the “fun” part is going to decline because you don’t get to stay in the “fun zone”. are you, and what did you do with susan walsh? while you may not want to focus exclusively on older guys, i recommend that this be one strategy in your portfolio., that should be “clearly either your baby is a little angle or you have a lot of help from the family”.@jpactually, with morality being a human social concept that is quite fluid across cultures and societies, and tribal affiliation being a genetically-driven (your tribe usually shares more genes than theirs), biologically common (all sorts of other animals display it) trait, i’d say it works the other way around. i can’t believe the mushy stuff some of you guys like to do! she actually began to avoid venues that were at all upscale, but she said that even sports bars had middle aged men hitting on really young women. the 25-29s went from 39% to 25% in those five years, so a bit under 1 in 3 previously unmarrieds got married. i think it’s fair to say that any woman who marries you in future is a fool.@susani think you’ll like the new post i just put up! did you actually notice that he might have been crushing on you ever so slightly before he actually burst open with his declaration of undying and eternal j love? maybe he should start going for hot 30-35 girls, right, or maybe even women closer to his age?, you’ve managed to royally piss off the mras, puas, internet feminazis, and reddit mangina dorks. if he tried to befriend you as part of a group it might be different, so i think your reading is accurate. however, if the guy your own age (a little younger) is interested in you, go for it! in hitting your peak, askmen describes men’s physical changes after 30: according to a recent survey of adult sexual behavior, men over the age of 40 were two to three times more likely to report a lack of sexual interest compared to men under the age of 30. good grief i’d have absolutely no idea how to show any affection to you if we somehow ended up in a relationship. my opinion of that is: “screw the investors” who is more important, them or you? as a young woman in her 20s and early 30s she was sexy as hell. i’m sure you are happy to be alive regardless of your disadvantages your kids will be happy too i can assure you.. finally, while you may find a bit of gray in the sideburns sexy, keep in mind that a man’s age will affect his parenting style. (also, did you know that that song was written for aaliyah by r.. lokland is right, he’s probably not that into you. you know how it goes: the more manic you are, the more you don’t need to sleep, and the more manic you become. however if i suspect when i get to be in my late 20s and 30s a 10+ age gap would be welcomed. distinctly remember the first time i ever shit-tested a guy. just hooked up with a guy:He fucked me at the frat house after beer pong.. that link describes the epic shit test she gave that you keep asking about.@ jason773it’s all game (psychological traits) and physical stature (eating well and working out). when i was 18, i did not feel mature enough to be dating a man in his upper 20s or 30s. granted, a month later he turned 25, but he was wiser, more eloquent and more mature in the spiritual/emotional sense than even many men who have years on him.. lots of good paying jobs with cheaper rents in nice, safe towns), or would you continue to try to make it happen in manhattan?@ charlottei would say that the guy wasn’t very interested in you. sex life (and i believe this is true for most guys) is just so important to me that i can’t commit without some indication of how it’s going to be. if following a script when physical intimacy happens before emotional intimacy isn’t yielding the results you seek, then try another way! when amped up, she becomes 2-3 “points” (as much as i hate to be numeric) hotter. it will get better as you move into the 2nd and 3rd episodes i think.. the fact that 10 years later guys are still using this wingman setup is incredibly pathetic. is it that the restricted guys think they are unrestricted because of their sorority membership and so they avoid them? a mid 30s woman approaching a successful mid 30s man is essentially asking to reap the benefits of stock she did not invest in when it was low.“men display and women select, so your results must determine your strategy. go on lots of dates (hey, free dinner), and you’ll find a guy here or there for short periods of time who will do that to you. plus, you are changing the argument here a bit (and the other guys are falling for it).) it gets far easier to ignore the unrestricted crowd when you don’t have to hear them every night. had just broken up with my so, and this group of 20-something guys acted like, well, high schoolers, when they saw me noticing this girl. ok cupid data on desirability by age as you can see, male desirability peaks at 26 and stays strong until about 30, at which point it decreases rapidly.”yes, but then the fun ends a few years and the woman/man falls out of love and wanders off.”your 23-24, i’m 2-3 years older than you depending on the time of year. that seems to be the case with the restricted guys here. a significantly older partner severely limits the stuff you can do together, too. i felt so special to have been “chosen” by a high status guy. if so, i bet with a bit more time she will open up more (assuming she’s not a true bore at heart) and you may just be the one to bring out her wild side. – what’s the psychology in dating an older man who looks young? i don’t think women have any idea that many men in their 30s would like to settle down – as you say, all the media attention is on aging women not being able to find mates. my only question would be why you would want to be friends with c.@susan:“@jpi think you would be a very interesting and unusual person to chat with at a cocktail party. if you’re unsure, a good rule of thumb is to draw the line at getting involved with anyone who is older than you by a quarter of the years you’ve been alive. thought you were getting hit on by men when you were babysitting and that you never hurt for attention and that not one girl in your sorority was below a 6. your natural answer might be the one i would have given when i was 15: because we are a perfect match and i am special and very mature. these and all relationships, it’s crucial to communicate clearly what your boundaries are, and by this i don’t mean wordlessly steering someone’s hand away from where it’s feeling around on your skirt like 23 times in a row while you’re kissing them. apparently in those days friend-zoning or dumping wasn’t enough punishment for nice guys. lot of the stuff i did to accept the “unacceptable” parts of myself would probably seem super-lame to you. used to work for this guy who lives down my street. we’re shallow and focused on your looks and your money; and if you’re fat and ugly, you better have big bucks or you’re never going to get laid”.“as for you, i find it hard to believe that you were at the bottom of the pile with those luscious big brown south asian boobies and delectable chocolate nipples. if you reserve the right to do it, then expect it to be used against you.” i was thinking you were like 5’0″ or something from your posts! there’s the whole possibility that i might never have existed if my parents had thought the same thing (though i was born in the ’80s, probably before this stuff was available… mwahaha you can’t get rid of me) but i’ve always sort of had the thought that just because a particular sperm/egg combo never becomes a full grown baby doesn’t mean that soul won’t be born as another sperm/egg combo. would you, if in her situation, want to speed up the wedding date or just say, “fuck it, we are definitely getting married, we will just wait until after the baby”? don’t know what the answer is, zach, but if i was trying to avoid connection and letting myself actually care about another person (and be vulnerable in return), i would follow a path much like yours. like the quote to deti yesterday, be the change you wish to see in this world, ted! most of these things will not be revealed in dates 3-6. was inspired to write this post by a couple of women i know who are really, really enjoying relationships with men ten years older. can hop relationship to relationship if you want (nothing wrong with it, sorry gents) or you can be in a relationship without the butterflies. i recall you once posed a map that showed more available guys were on the west coast…. young women know they have sexual power over unavailable middle-aged men, and they relish it. she enjoyed living in her “big city/sophisticated” environment, and liked the excitement of all the men she was dating.. honestly, your description of your desires (want to have butterflies, guy to hang out with on the weekend, not serious) is exactly the type of girl i would highlight with a laser designator were i still looking for casual sex. others don’t even say “i love you” vocally (my parents) and that also works for them. it can be more challenging to meet older guys, who are unlikely to hang out in the same venues frequented by the post-college crowd. there’s something to be said for dealing with infants in one’s youth rather than middle age. though, any suggestions on where to meet guys specifically in new york? i mean obviously there is the dating game before you get to this point, but i think i can feel out a “cozy” person right away. the popularization of second wave feminism, with the accompanying view that a woman’s virginity was her own to dispose of, removed those laws from the books, but i would bet that someone on this thread will characterize the criminal prosecution of the man in your link as “feminist. i agree with tasmin that the whole wing-man thing, and the buddy asking if you are interested, seems pretty juvenile. we were both divorced, and at 32 she met me and things just clicked. didn’t say it was a goal, she said it under the heading of “you never know. this something you see in a lot of men, or just a few that are at the ends of the bell curve of the ones you’ve dated? 26, 2012 1,475 comments women in college perceive a dearth of relationship-minded men, so those who want to fall in love and have a serious relationship often look to graduation as the time when things will improve as traditional dating reappears.” “i don’t know, why don’t you ask irare? have you ever fallen in love before sleeping with someone? – “it is odd for someone you’re seeing frequently to say they miss you. (granted, her older sister was kinda slutty, so, you can’t win them all.. she rode the alpha cock carousel for 12 years and now that she’s about to become a crone she wants a guy with a good job to marry her because none of the guys she really wants will have her. tyrion lannister is the most “alpha” guy on the show! did you actually notice that he might have been crushing on you ever so slightly before he actually burst open with his declaration of undying and eternal j love?. found out you were 21 and has been conditioned by feminism to believe he’d be creepy for going for you (or that you’d think he was creepy).’t you ever experienced events that seem more like you are living in a storybook? i suspect this girl needs a more restricted guy, not someone who will drop her in favor of the “cheaper” sex that is readily available to you. you’d have to revoke suffrage, uninvent birth control, and criminalize abortion. if you never got asked to prom, then you can probably relate well to a whole lot of men who had to wait (or are still waiting) to see their smv rise into view – and that’s a good thing. she didn’t wind up with him, but before long she had a bf who was not at all bad looking. can actually pull much younger and hotter women if they take care of themselves, have something women want(high status, charm, charisma, sexual experience etc etc), and if they don’t become emotionally attached to someone.” “i don’t know, why don’t you ask irare? i knew my current wife for over two months before we started “dating” (we never really dated but started becoming a couple sounds stupid…) and i still didn’t feel comfortable taking any clothes off with her for another month.@otcyou may very well be right about watching what men do rather than what they say. it’s not that a girl would necessarily be disgusted by an unrestricted guy’s past, but perhaps she would not be comfortable moving as quickly as other girls had been, and that would turn the guy off, or make him think she was weird.“so, she’s helping future cooper so that the youthful women know that he’s a good catch. so that’s not a reason men would be more or less likely than women to do online dating. but a guy in his 40’s shooting for a 22yo woman is a pervert, and let’s not even talk about those 50+ guys! yeah, i agree that a divorced guy might not be an ideal bet, but as a formerly divorced and now remarried man, i’d at least say don’t discount a guy simply because he couldn’t make it work with some other woman.”saturday 🙂 with my mil 🙁“you know that your history is entwined with these feelings. an older man is established, less prone to let his affections meander, and much less likely to fall prey to a young woman’s shit tests; his younger counterparts generally do not have the wisdom that comes with experience.” again, my perception of the situation is that the only difference between you and the “unrestricted” girls is your actual n. have you ever tried out some of my suggestions with men?@pvwshe might be of high enough smv to pique their interest, but if she is seen as prudish because she is unwilling to put out by date 3 or 4, it will be the kiss of death. its more about exactly how you behaved, perhaps despite your socio-economic status. google fool-saint if you don’t know what i mean. that guy didn’t even let me come up for air. i will tell you: the ltr-oriented guys would move on and the players would say “ooh, perfect!, it gives you a ton of power over the teachers. i also find that, once money is off the table, it’s the women who have fewer options or who have been abandoned by their own fathers who go for the older guys. you have a lot to offer, you just need to understand your target market (it’s not 25 year old men!, the more you see yourself as a loving parent would: with infinite patience and unquenchable love and acceptance.”my point is that you can’t know really this until the fun and exciting part of the relationship ends, which normally happens once you are actually married. was saying that you have a pretty big battle to fight if you want to correct these misapprehensions. hope, you are quite the analyzer of human nature, in my opinion.@ passer_byi would like to second the observation that you are a quite a lovely negro. years younger maximized men’s lifetime reproductive success—in other words, the number of offspring surviving to age 18. when we see a guy in his 30s, we assume he could obviously be married right now if he wanted, so he must be choosing to play the field indefinitely. if you happen to still be all those things with your husband despite him not exerting any level of dominance whatsoever, then great for you.”they seem to have taken something you wrote to suggest that every person in a non-marital ltr is in constant “trade up at the first opportunity” mode.: a month or two ago the men here hijacked yet another thread and started posting about fantasy hot girls; i think the average age of the women listed on the aggregated great fap-off material list was probably in the 38-42 zone. but more often than not, it appears that women take much longer than high school to mature, especially since today’s young women no longer have the guidance of their parents. they have spent a minimum of 3-6 hours in each other’s company getting to know each other. once again, the guys she is likely to meet will either players who expect fast pinv or else niceguys who are at risk of being led on. @ hope“ah, maybe that is because i tend to not over-exaggerate the effects of something, the way certain folks in the manosphere shriek every time a woman says something remotely “bad” about any man. you are always going on about being short, but 5’7″ isn’t “short. other words: are you part of the problem or part of the solution? when door dating 20 years older woman realize really wasn’t sure how to handle this situation and not spend all your time together.@olive i wonder if, much like girls who road the carousel have issues when they try to lock it down with a restricted guy, guys who played the unrestricted game struggle when it comes to getting with a restricted girl. of 1248: “i want to use the threat pregnancy to control you completely.
if i’m your girlfriend, i want you to end it with me., to reiterate, i am not suggesting that women stop dating guys their own age. real nice guys have heard it in so many of their rejections that the word becomes kyrtonyte. wasn’t talking about offending you – i know that’s damn near impossible. the tone is one of “if you actually wanted to have a real emotional connection (coughforonce)…” see how that becomes a judgment on zach’s character?” it’s more like listening, asking questions, not judging, not invalidating feelings, and not advising. if you don’t but you keep going because it’s fun for now or having a bf/gf is nice or whatever, you are using that person. caused you to lose attraction, you are free to end the relationship rather than carry on even though you don’t find her attractive any more. server associates your appears on the minor’s birth certificate or within 43 days after they first hallways at school, in her social. i am 33, and would like to marry a woman about 20 years younger than me., because once you make a lifelong commitment, you exit the market and stop shopping. the question is how do you motivate more boys (junior high and high school) to do well enough in school and to go to college in numbers equalling or exceeding the number of women, assuming there is value to that. 🙂well now the plot has roped me in, so i’m going to watch episode 3. since india’s independence in 1947—or more precisely since 1943—there has been a spectacular revival of the phenomenon in four northern indian states: bihar, uttar pradesh, madhya pradesh, and especially rajasthan, a former stronghold of sati. my strategy worked for me, and i ended up with an older version of cooper.””i think you are knocking down a straw man here.@emily– have you seen the actress that plays cersei with her natural hair? younger woman, older man thing will always raise brows from both sexes due to jealousy.@ charlotte, if you’re hesitant/reluctant to do online dating you can make an account and just browse profiles.:but, after a month (and no sex), the two of you were not so emotionally attached such that your feelings would (or should) impact his decision whether or not to continue the relationship. 😉i would only add, don’t just talk to girls– practice talking to everyone you can!”unless of course you’re getting the shitty end of the stick. because christianity has one standard and it has been this way for hundreds and hundreds of years!@pvw: and the thing is, i know women who are just like the type zach is dating, living in big cities like nyc, where they really don’t belong–high smv value women who are restricted. the loft bed lost its appeal sometime between 12 and 13 years old it seems., i definitely feel for you and the mean things that were said to you. from the beginning of the night, the 30 year old guy was telling me that the 27 year old (let’s call him dan) was very interested in me and that i was “totally dan’s type”.: i dont think of you as a thin, sexy woman. unless a woman was desperate and knew her smv was low, she would never take herself out of circulation for a guy she was not interested in. because christianity has one standard and it has been this way for hundreds and hundreds of years!. if you’ll excuse the extremely unfortunate pun, weight is such a huge chunk of smv that it’s very difficult to overlook. the majority of college age women went for older guys out of college then who does that leave for the college guys? woman moonlights clown focused social network, since it has been one that marriage is wrong because it outside of your deal with elements at the years. another sign that men feel the pressure, the frisky asked six bachelors in their 30s about their state of mind after one guy friend worried that he was becoming a “toxic bachelor:”i want to settle down. you stay with your girlfriend, and marry her, hoping such a thing never happens again? december i am turning 33 and i find it depressing as hell that according to this blog, i’ve reached my peak and basically have nothing to offer to a quality guy who is looking to settle down.”there’s literally no help required to “pit the aging 28-33 year old women against the younger, more aggressive, 23-27 year old women” by that time. i’ve lost touch with her, but she found someone perfect just when she was at your age, i think. a guy like ron perelman, whom i would regard as average looking for his age, will always have options that a less wealthy man will not.@susan“would you want a woman to marry you because she’d been in an ltr with you, even though her attraction for you had begun to wane in recent months, and a handsome guy at work was tempting her with regular invitations? i wouldn’t mind “i can’t stop thinking about you! is obviously gonna depend on the guy in question but theres a sweet spot that can maximize a woman’s comfort zone whilst maximizing her number of prospective mates. guess i would change my mind over time (probably around 25) but i still couldn’t picture myself with a much older guy. i have your blessing – thanks mate…i’ll let you know how i get on., ironically, i think it’s you who misread jp’s post. i’m having a hard time seeing why you’d accuse me of trapping this man. weight lifting increases your t, but precisely how much is sort of an x factor. you’ll more than likely met him through a social circle that you are establishing now. they may mature from liking bad boys in high school to selecting for character in college.“i think it’s fair to say that any woman who marries you in future is a fool. have you convinced one hussie or hussar to do anything differently? the bad news is they may be so set in their ways that they are lousy at making the compromises that help a marriage get over the rough spots.”i’m sorry deti, but i really think you’ve gone off the rails here., i don’t consider myself an intellectual, but i will say that restricted chicks are operating on a whole different wavelength than you’ve been accustomed to. missing me while he is supposed to be managing a portfolio sounds like bad news for investors. women who were more willing to “put some skin in the game” or “cowgirl up” were considered true nyc badass women. he ages, like a fine wine, his awesomeness will increase somehow, as if by magic and he will be the target of a massive unplanned intragirl war, out of which he will emerge the victor and the older cohort of girls will lose, finding themselves relegated to men under the age of 25 in despair. formed subject of greek man, you compliments argentina dating customs in hour and the account was closed but right after he noticed was that daughter. i challenge you to also consider what you might bring to the table. they are still getting drunk texted by guys their own age, and they have zero desire to go back to that scene. it goes strictly against deti’s lectures last week – perhaps you didn’t agree with him about a woman following her husband and putting his career first? years older (the female preference), you might want to look at guys a bit older. perhaps its just that he has spent several years plowing through the “hotter, younger, tighter” women, so he won’t miss out on anything when he prioritizes the older women now. just think it’s funny how if you change the phraseology by less than 1% it’s totally cutting edge hip pc even though to untrained ears it sounds almost exactly the same. about 9 months single, exactly two 1st dates, two three weeks in to the second girl and… you guessed it: ltr that then became a 12 year marriage. that’s just as true of marriage as it is of dating. is that how you refer to elderly women and grandmothers?@loklandunlike you, most people won’t end a relationship for just any reason. we definitely need some bad boy shaming, and parents are the ones who should be doing this.@ susan walshhe was the most emo guy i’ve ever known, but to be honest, that was part of his appeal. of course, dating a man too much older when the woman was significantly younger was an obvious sign of her money-grubbing whorishness, but never reflected poorly on the brilliant, powerfully erotic wisdom of the older man.”it’s kind of hard to know this until you really are married to somebody. you can see, men tend to focus on the youngest most fertile womenfixed that for you. but maybe within it, you’ll find these points as useful as i would have at your age. write it fast, a bunch of other people have just seen your idea! asked the question about the cappy link…what do you reckon?, i won’t suggest anyone withdraw from the social scene because they aren’t ready to commit to a marriage, as some of the guys seem to be suggesting. it goes without saying that you’ll need to be a quality woman worthy of commitment. i was reacting to the idea that us old guys have delusions of wrangling up some super young virginal bride., here’s where i bring up the big topic that drives the whole controversy surrounding this discussion, one which i would have rolled my eyes at when i was dating my 28-year-old, but which i now know is a valid line of thinking: if a person who is of legal drinking age or above makes a habit of courting people who are in high school, there’s a good chance they might be a pedophile (or, if you want to be super technical, an ephobophile)., and maybe this is just from living in the northeast (the south and midwest are fat), but i constantly see early/mid 30s women who are very, very attractive.@ susan walshit is odd for someone you’re seeing frequently to say they miss you.) then why not slow things down and get to know her as a person instead of focusing on escalating to date 3 sex? since you are in your early 30’s, you are in a decent place in terms of the range of ages you *could* consider for a mate. that’s a recipe for bad news, and basically sums up my high school relationship in a nutshell. think you know it when you are with someone you can see as your lifelong mate, and i believe in that intuition. and quite possiblely for many years, too, just like my grandmother. they have two, both very young, and my uncle probably won’t be around much longer. two things together for 40 years then try and pull them apart. a fact that continues to muddle the expectations and reconciliation among the 30-something women and men. the judgment goes both ways here, and you can see that in iggles’ comment (sorry to put you on the spot iggles! before marriage, you are not obligated to stay with someone through thick and thin. but you are a couple, and everyone knows you as a pair. if she isn’t comfortable with you, whatever, that’s not your problem. like i said, online dating is normal in nyc (where people are stressed to the death over their careers and have run out of numbers in their rolodexes). the history is fascinating, but it has for 70 years been about making films. two guys behind the deli counter gave me free food! well, during that time she started dating a guy that was older than she was (i don’t remember how much, but definitely older). actually agree with the idea that the body is secondary to the soul, but i also think you have to take a leap of faith because someone has to provide the body and maybe being imperfect is actually the key to fulfilling their destiny. but women often scare men off if at 21 or 22, they are saying “you are the one i want to marry”. i’m curious because i personally don’t know many (or any) guys that are overly emotional like you’ve described- it would seem intuitive that most men would be overly guarded about their emotions (and yes, i may be biased because that is how i am). if she has been a more restricted girl, you probably scare the hell out of her. dating is a way of learning more about someone, and it’s going to make you like them more or less. in america, prior to about 1950, it was possible to sue and/or jail a man for “breech of promise” in the circumstances described in the article you linked. you don’t even allow the small talk with the woman at work. not to be all dramatic, but seriously: flying solo with an older guy who wants to sleep with you in shady places where no one knows who you’re with or where you are = a really easy way to get murked or otherwise hurt. in addition, you had a very serious relationship end after years of being together.”you had girls in your high school with breast implants? the problem for us guys is how to distinguish the charlottes from all the women who’re seeking susan-style ltrs., i was always more of an old testament kinda guy.”it’s pretty easy for some guys to meet girls in nyc — the ones who are good-looking, outgoing, and charming. you are co-authoring a paper, have musical skillz (i still think you should learn the violin version of smooth criminal– it’s not hard! if that isn’t incentive to get married before you turn 40, we don’t know what is. you have the advantage of already knowing women this age – they are in your social circle.@kendrai’m so glad you returned to read all the comments to you! you’ve done so well for yourself and your family though. you say it’s fine for a lot of young girls because they’re “sick of the bar scene”, and then accuse the men on it of “not being able to meet anyone” even though it’s easy to meet new people in nyc. three of them followed that scenario in their early twenties and married well in their late 20s and early 30s. men are becoming increasingly resentful of this kind of scrutiny that questions their character simply because they are unmarried in their 30s. one guy tried to shoot himself in the heart and missed. i see that while i was away you got a lot of great feedback already from guys.@ramble“uh, jackie, tons of guys go whiteknighting thinking that this is the path to success and then become crestfallen when they see the girl with the guy in that shitty band. now he’s dating once more with an eye toward finding a gf. that guy didn’t even let me come up for air. i’ve gone to several charity balls (filled with arrogant men), volunteered all over and continue to do so (met some lovely gay guys who have become good friends), and i haven’t joined one of those intramural sports teams, but my coworkers that have had no luck meeting anyone.! did you ever see him in “duel in the sun”? if the relationship ends for other reasons, then that happens, not merely because you want to upgrade to the better model. i know it is impossible to really “know” what goes through mens minds, but you have so much insight., this is what a relationship-oriented man could think about her — even in the face of a really smooth and good looking guy who has bedded lots of hot women, she doesn’t give up her requirement for emotional connection before being able to have sex. i’m wondering if the reason many of you seem to think that “getting to know someone” takes months is because you all just like too damn many people., and re: the downsides of dating older men–such as decreased libido and longevity–men who are into physical fitness will mitigate or obliterate both of these boundaries. cooper, you already know girls your age want to have fun, so there’s half the answer right there. no “dude, you should just do such and such” or “buck up, man.“but a guy in his 40′s shooting for a 22yo woman is a pervert, and let’s not even talk about those 50+ guys! is why it should not surprise you that a study interviewing 2,000 weirdly specific humans found the exact same thing: that the ideal age gap between men and women is exactly 52 months, provided the man is older, because, duh.@j:“in america, prior to about 1950, it was possible to sue and/or jail a man for “breech of promise” in the circumstances described in the article you linked. and i assume that after a lifetime of sexually activity(began at age 11 with two girls 5 years older than him) he’s probably far better in the sack than most young, hot guys.@intjfirst, i think erica awakening is perhaps not guilty by reason of insanity, but during this period of months of building intimacy, she knew the guy had a gf. he’s a member of your tribe, she’s not. am picky, and by having fun, i don’t mean sleeping with the guys that aren’t really committed. this:“, okay, so what tangible results do you have to show for your efforts? most of them have told me that “you were way too put-together for most college guys” and that i was intimidating because of my “fashion-y clothes” and interest in getting away from the campus and into the real world. they have been dating for 2 years and they have never discussed the longer term? it’s a nice fantasy, but, as a woman who in her 50s, i can tell you that any affection i feel towards men in their 80s comes out of missing my dad.. “pretty”, insofar that she seems feminine enough, and she’s cute, and probably the type that a lot of college guys today would love to find but can’t. somebody charlotte would be best off with a guy who’s restricted, but also in her age range. you kinda have a habit of relating every single discussion point to one of your “pet” topics (whether that be open marriage, south asian religions/culture, etc., on the blogs were the adage gets a lot of credence, there are older guys who think that they can continue to be attractive to very young women into their 60s as long as they work out. which is definitely exceptional, and also does not make her special or worth dating by itself. yeah, you’re going to have to heavily screen for the guys who just want a hook-up, but a lot of my girlfriends had much better luck with it than i did. i go outside to get some fresh air and new guy follows me out. which, if you’re too conservative to have soon, will drive away the players.. i’m interested in a person 18 months younger than me. we definitely still have that spark, which people say is supposed to disappear after a few years, especially after you have a baby. the older the man is, the less the maxim holds imo. texan, 37that sounds like a term invented by a woman projecting. but women often scare men off if at 21 or 22, they are saying “you are the one i want to marry”yup. so if you’re a girl and you’re not offering that (or laying breadcrumbs to that point), you’ve got to be pretty amazing in the other areas to hold onto any guy who has options. just because the man is older does not mean the child would not be taken care of, one way or another. don’t write off a guy after the first date or two if you don’t feel any “chemistry”. the same messege that tells a woman to look past 3. these guys never dated a woman their own age or older. – “you are all missing the point that i have made five times already. think you’ll like the new post i just put up! long as you are neurochemically high, so to speak, it’s hard to see how you figure this out., she’s helping future cooper so that the youthful women know that he’s a good catch. the thing is, i know women who are just like the type zach is dating, living in big cities like nyc, where they really don’t belong–high smv value women who are restricted. not the vibe, not his friend rushing him to leave, not what chuck said about his interest in you. is the biggest question you should ask yourself about some older suitor who’s sniffing around your doorstep.“i am not running anyone except ron perelman down, whom i consider to be a bad man. mean, i know 99% of the posts are basically repeat posts from guys too horny to keep it to themselves…but i wonder what it is about these women who could transfix a guy enough to actually spur him to write a longing post about her, wanting to know her, but knowing full well she would probably never even see it.@ escoffierfunny how “colored” marks you as kkk but “person of color” means you are more enlightened than buddha.:“would you say, then, that men can express disgust at fat and ugly women, but women cannot ever do so about men?’s clear from your commentary that you want women to be very restricted, in behavior, attitude and desire. if high smv women would shoulder some risk and invest in men that show promise, there would be a lot fewer men that felt they got shafted in the dating market for building up themselves in some meaningful way rather than mere superficial charm.“if you don’t like that, ignore those women”the problem is, if you’re a 1 out 5, then you’re ignoring nearly everyone, since it’s relative. this post i wanted to advise women to consider more men, and to deflate the prejudice against single guys in their 30s, which is hypocritical and unreasonable. i’d never want to go back and start over at 18, i’d entertain the chance to start again at 23-ish., passer-by, if you want to have that argument all over again, fine with me, if susan will allow it, but i specfically did not say that the women had no agency, i said over and over that they did. you guys are acting like she’s channeling carrie bradshaw.“men are becoming increasingly resentful of this kind of scrutiny that questions their character simply because they are unmarried in their 30s.. online dating offers a traditional dating model, though its success among women in their early 20s is mixed, as many are reluctant to go with the “blind date” approach so quickly. however, we had those shameful traditions more than thousand years ago – it’s shocking to learn that there are countries were last such practices were just what, 25 years ago?, when you do this to somebody, you feel a lifetime of guilt. agree with the strong interest in mid 30s men wanting a relationship. the case of some the real fringe guys, i can’t imagine that they might be source of good ideas. if it ended up being the right guy, i’d stop being so selfish because i see him becoming a major portion of my life. one is the “don’t sleep with him until you’re dating”. i think you underestimate that number of guys that married women who were at best marginally attracted to them, because they didn’t know any better. add to that my tendencies to feel i’m always right, and that i’m a judgmental asshat, and you can easily see how me and catholic grade school just didn’t get along well. if i was friends with charles manson, and a girl who he was hitting on asked me what he was like, i’d tell her he was a fantastic, balanced, sane guy. magical night is tomorrow 🙂(and if you poor anglo-saxon don’t know the customs, you should start learning already). naked women aren’t so bad to look at, especially the ones on got.@ saywhaat you’re right, this only applies to people in relationships, virgins have no feelings lolit’s true! is it really controversial to say that most people don’t continue to look great into their 60s, as compared to 20-30 years younger? i mean, what character on shows do you think should get dumped for their weight? i hated dating, i had a lot of bad experiences, and i would be totally fine if i never had to go back into the nyc shark-infested waters. most guys i know think that way as well, but plenty of girls i know have said they could make out for hours with nothing else. there a reason why you haven’t said “till death do us part”. i said this:while you may not want to focus exclusively on older guys, i recommend that this be one strategy in your portfolio. the results with in the first 24 hours pretty much confirm that short guys aren’t just not wanted but actively hated against. and if your doing it for “fun”, your much more likely to feel more comfortable with the guy doing it for the former reason. thing is, i remember a painting rather similar to this one hanging in my grandparents house as a young boy. if i’m your girlfriend, i want you to end it with me.@susanquick update on the more conservative girl i’m dating. young, attractive women are always asking him out, paying for his dinner and for the other stuff he has. tribalism, ie favoritism towards the in-group, occurs across every culture and time frame, and is driven by genetics (your tribe is much more likely to share genes with you than some outsider). bumble the beadle in oliver twist, if you want to know his ending! i know quite a few, in fact, especially in the older generation! in emotional terms you want to snag the guy before he gets older, pickier, more independent, acquires more baggage, and becomes more bitter.’s a set of men in my office in their 40s that look after themselves, and while no one would confuse them for a fresh college grad they’re not even close to paunchy, and in fact can still run rings around the mid 20s guys., i don’t mean for this article to read as “a horrible old man took my youthful innocence,” because that’s not what happened. pussy eaten night 50 year older dating service long and its want to love me then would.. let’s face it, dating in college and especially high school is pretty much darwinian and drives entirely towards the superficial.’s really common for older partners to pull the you’re-so-young-and-i-know-so-much-better-than-you card about just about everything, from movies to politics to sex. now, i wouldn’t have assumed that that’s what you meant, but it’s what you said. you can’t dodge this by redefining it to be college-educated only, unless you want to admit that you never talk to men without college. yeah, it will definitely help intj if he does the “talk to a girl every day” strategy, at least imhoi always tell scared guys to start talking to everyone (minus children). she may turn out to be a wildcat once you clear her filters for comfort and intimacy. you’ll need to be extra vigilant to filter out cads who have no intentions of committing to anyone, but you’ll also find this to be a group of men who are more financially secure, socially adept, well-rounded intellectually and emotionally stable.” but “i miss you” implies some sort of need that is not being met. share your distaste of the sexualisation of youth, but again it’s a global / western (? – so it would be the: umamimp (pronounced you-ma’am-imp) not catchy but it could work. is the scene:monica: but you broke up with jennifer when she got fat.@ passer_bycrap, now i have to rush home quicky and have my wife take care of this raging hard on you just me. don’t see the reason to wait for a guy to become a better catch if he is generally a good guy, has graduated college and is willing to have a relationship now. if not, you only get one chance and that’s life. rape dating advice love advice teen dating tips dating tips., it may be “typical and normal” but just because it worked out for you doesn’t mean it worked out for society or for most of the people in it. i think most women don’t struggle with fertility before their mid to late 30s. it is rare that a guy doesn’t ever get back to you with good reason. the grocery store yesterday, in a 40 minute timeframe, i had 5 guys come up to me and start talking. i’m simply saying that you can decide to break up with your gf for gaining 10 lbs. first, being attracted to older guys is completely and totally normal. you know how i am about being around people and being noticed.
@jackie“seeing as you’re already married, no problem, right? but as long as he keeps adjusting the age of his women up to compensate his aging, dating will become easier and easier. sad part, i think is that she saw more into her dating relationships than the men she was with did. even if you are not harming others or violating someone else’s rights, you should not degrade yourself, because it dishonors you, your creator, and the sacred order of the universe. it is also why “complete honesty” can simply not be a part of the “dating” experience. games, on the other hand, are specifically designed to challenge you, and you get to accomplish “something” within the context of the story. one says: “i hate it when they say they miss you! sexually i have lost nada since my twenties and i can still bench 300 pounds. you’re right, though, it really is a matter of personal style, and also habits., girls who want to get married off in the near future should probably focus on older guys (late 20s-early 30s).’m pretty proud of the fact that she had no idea i was terrified and just thought it was my awkwardness at being with a new woman after 12 years of marriage.) i actually disagree with susan about your age and being too young to worry about marriage. i remember one week that i had dates with 3 separate men. if they chase you despite this knowledge, they’re putting their sexual interest above the basic and awful knowledge that they are probably hurting what is, let’s face it, a kid. is in nyc, so maybe he’ll chime in with some good suggestions about how to meet guys, although i suspect he is one of the arrogant men at the charity ball. if you don’t but you keep going because it’s fun for now or having a bf/gf is nice or whatever, you are using that person. he’s a member of your tribe, she’s not. i don’t blame you for being completely turned off, it sounds like she is not in touch with her own sexuality at all. no matter what he’s telling himself on his setting page, a 30 year-old man spends as much time messaging 18 and 19 year-olds as he does women his own age. like the majority of young adults today, they are seeking a `soul mate. raises concerns is the idea that you want to date for the feeling it gives you without, apparently, thinking about how he might be affected. what point did you realize that you had woven the perfect web of intrigue with which to catch and trap this poor unsuspecting chap?, i think more and more guys are doing just that! 🙁 i am super restricted, but even i know that you can use about a million things to create a spark. i can’t wait for you to meet him (not associating you with him, i just like him). the popularization of second wave feminism, with the accompanying view that a woman’s virginity was her own to dispose of, removed those laws from the books, but i would bet that someone on this thread will characterize the criminal prosecution of the man in your link as “feminist. over a period of years, it became harder and harder for him to resist the temptation to try and get more of that. maybe that will change after i turn 30, but i’m not really predicting a huge jump. never, ever trust what a guy’s friends tell you about the guy.. i would hardly say i wove a trap for him, and i’m pretty offended you think so. remember when i was younger, i used to see men with women who were 20 years younger, and thought “what a selfish asshole.@susanone quick point about dating older men is that the older men may not always want to date a younger woman. 😉“i assure you that i can put many evangelical preachers to shame when it comes to fiery speeches about sin, evil, and eternal damnation, and i’m not all that invested in the religious aspects at all. it has more to do with people becoming too entrenched in their age-specific social circles and thus lacking the opportunities to mix it up with an older set than an actual resistance to older suitors. i didn’t feel like putting all that into words, but you did it marvelously! heard her boys, make sure to develop a strategy of least interestpli is a strategy to get hand when you really like someone. if dating goes well, the next step is ltr (so far we are on track). be it modern medical tech, women having fewer children, or even the appeal of lululemon, to me a lot of women are staying attractive at much older ages than was previously true (one girl i was dating introduced me to her aunt, who was 40, and i honestly would have tossed aside the 23 year old in a heartbeat for her she was that gorgeous). 😉 i remember when i have been the recipient of flowers, a kiss on the hand, or some small token of tribute from a guy on the street.@david foster(dawn’s desires at thirty should not be thought of as “settling”…the author makes her sexual desire for her older & more stable new love interest just about as clear as one could get away with in 1911 in a mainstream novel)that’s a very interesting excerpt! definitely still have that spark, which people say is supposed to disappear after a few years, especially after you have a baby.@charlotteyou remind me a lot of a very close girl friend (platonic) of mine., jackie, tons of guys go whiteknighting thinking that this is the path to success and then become crestfallen when they see the girl with the guy in that shitty band. ok cupid is a young demographic, so the chart primarily shows who is attractive to young people.”response to your claim that an ltr ends the second someone better comes along. you, most people won’t end a relationship for just any reason. because he just got a sweet offer from ubs and you got one from procter & gamble. how many times have we heard guys say “sloppy seconds” here? at the same time, i think it’s folly to suggest that a man’s smv peaks in his late 30s. seriously, you could make a whole blog out of that.@rolloi do think you might broaden your age range to about 20 years instead of 5-10. most people don’t get that lucky, and they wind up dating a few people, which is also ok. you see, on many ways we are working towards the same goal. that’s a recipe for bad news, and basically sums up my high school relationship in a nutshell. a black man saying to me, you are a pretty white girl. among the 50 year olds are some attractive looking marreid milf types; yes, you can see they are older, but they keep themselves in shape. it wasn’t until their first date that they found out each was off by a few years. they often get played freshman year once, get even more cautious, and promptly become invisible to the frats for the remainder of their college years. why would cooper or intj want to invest their time and emotions in you? you catch the charts at ‘d’s place (no link) showing that (subject to sampling errors) the women never married 35-39 y. when i was in my 30s……actually my mid-thirties were all over the map. i mean, a wife that much younger could possibly make a guy feel younger himself, and more “in touch” with a totally new crowd.‘every bodies stressed, you need to learn to handle the workload. why are these two still together after 2 years if they haven’t even discussed getting engaged?@jpi think this is one of the problems in life; you are generally going to find someone you like better because you are going to continue to be exposed to new people as you move forward in life. i haven’t bought the game for that reason i freaking love it but the baby is too young to learn and our friends always want to try new games instead of the boring catan every single time we play, like i always want, in that vein my husband’s best friend wife tries to go for the “longest road” i’m more development cards/bigger army. there’s a strong correlation between whether a woman is interested in temporary-ltrs or marriage and whether she goes after guys her age or older guys.@intjomg, j will probably have a good concrete suggestion for dealing with your friend, but if you think he is really contemplating suicide i think you should alert his loved ones and urge him to talk to someone asap.“in india, having sex with a woman by falsely saying you will marry her is considered rape. that’s really all i’ve been saying charlotte should do but you’ve responded as if i were making some paleolithic demand., do you not get the sense she might be feeling that there’s sufficient chemistry, and escalation pace? when i was 15, i was dating a 28-year-old (cue gasping).@jl125what’s the psychology in dating an older man who looks young? why the change in tone in regards to older men dating younger women? the results of your proposed test might be interesting & surprising idk.’m going to continue to agree to disagree – i don’t think you can prohibit that.”it’s too late to deny whatever it is that you’re denying here.-stringent requirement as to not be more than a few years older than the woman… then you pretty much just have a caste mating system because you simply cannot have youth, appearance, and resources in the same man unless it is inherited, and this is speaking as someone that jumped from a working class family to umc well before he was 30. in this post i refer to the quality guys who date numerous women and exit quickly when they perceive it’s not a match. for fun sounds very much like using other people for your entertainment. their same-age male peers are potentially more interested in relationships, now that they’re the younguns again (which means fewer options). it’s not surprising as you are twice her age.@bastiat bloggeri’m going to go against the grain here and recommend the carousel (moderate, carousel-lite version: n<3 rides per year/heavy emphasis on high-smv men/no more than 4 years of active operations) for charlotte.!can you give concrete examples of what i’m missing? i wasn’t when i met my husband, so i knew how to be sensual/sexy/seductive, but if a girl is not experienced — which some guys say they want — then how should she know? the bad boy and having the bad boy are very different. what’s the difference between what you’ve been reading and the beta provider bait and switch gambit? that idea also applies to the years between you and an older paramour. all the discussion that goes here about how most men are just looking for a girl to settle down with, even back in my dating years, looking overly anxious to marry scared men off. heck, i think i’ve made out with 6 guys in my life and slept with 1.@ susan walshsounds like the guy i mentioned yesterday, who told me about the constellations and then kissed me. is fun to think about, but if i chalked up my entire relationship to fate, i’d have to devalue the challenge of two years of long distance, the semester abroad with limited contact, the family controversy from last year, and my manic episode/subsequent hospitalization and grad school dropout. I don't know about you, but when I find myself talking to an older man, especially a man who is exactly four years and four months older than me, something clicks. no chance to scare guys off because wearing fashionable clothes, and not that many gays there i guess too.@zachi thought of you when writing this post, knowing full well that you’ve got women after you now who would do better to go older, and you’ll also have women after you in 10 years when you’re ready to settle down.”in a very strange role reversal here, i can’t help but say: you are spinning your wheels brother. 🙁i was being intentionally hyperbolic– you’ve never said the 5lbs part to my knowledge. i remember one guy i dated a few times – i told him that i’d gotten into wharton and that i would be moving back east to go to business school. i wouldn’t either if i didn’t talk to young women as much as i do. haven’t spoken to a single young man in the last four years who wants to marry before his late 20s at the earliest.“just asking you to not tar all of us with the same brush.@susan“of course, but i’m afraid you’re shooting the messenger. alone does not make a man more desirable, in fact men must work to both preserve their youth/health physically as well as work to establish those “something else’s”., on the blogs were the adage gets a lot of credence, there are older guys who think that they can continue to be attractive to very young women into their 60s as long as they work out. it’s creepy for a 30-something year old guy to be with a 19yo, but we are still talking about a 11-12 year difference, and like i said, i don’t think me with a 29yo would be outrageous or “icky”.’ve heard male commenters, particularly those seeking involvements with younger women, at roissy and elsewhere in the ‘sphere quote this maxim seriously. you might feel like you and your older person are emotional equals, but again, age and gender differences create power imbalances, and those can be leveraged to pressure you into stuff, no matter how self-possessed you are. it goes strictly against deti’s lectures last week – perhaps you didn’t agree with him about a woman following her husband and putting his career first? it’s much more useful to take stock of a guy’s reputation (if you can) than to judge him based on his age, height, address, car, etc. was recently explaining the ins and outs of drinking and how to ask permission from your elders to me (different culture). it doesn’t mean you have “daddy issues” or whatever; that phrase doesn’t actually mean anything, because it can be applied (or, preferably, not) to every person on the planet., that should be “clearly either your baby is a little angle or you have a lot of help from the family”. she’s gorgeous, and goes on maybe 4-5 dates a week, often with different guys (80% from online). in market terms you want to buy when the price is low, and when your own purchasing power is the highest. a 50 year old man is more likely to be in the “well off” league, but well off doesn’t get you candice swanepoel.@susan:“we definitely need some bad boy shaming, and parents are the ones who should be doing this. and on the flipside, why spend more time than the hours of 11 pm to 9 am with a girl who isn’t going to sleep with you? looking for a ltr, but not really thinking about marriage)despite what the men were saying in the other thread, most early-20s guys are not in a rush to get married. if you don’t do it, i’m going to snipe it for my love, actually style hus screenplay., the engaged couple were very intelligent and they did 2 tours and spent a total of 5 years in west africa and came home really disappointed and disabused of the whole notion.“and speaking as someone who fell hard for a guy, only to discover later that he lied about me giving him a blowjob at a party, no,”well, if you’d just given him the god damn blowjob he wouldn’t have had to lie, now, would he?’ve been thinking of you, so good to have an update! you want to know what my first impression of him was? as i said, what you’re doing now will weed out both types of guys. only that real spark is going to see you through 25+ years. i haven’t spoken to a single young man in the last four years who wants to marry before his late 20s at the earliest. if you reserve the right to do it, then expect it to be used against you. guys want the young thing, and women wish they were the young thing again. time behaves more peculiarly when you’re younger because everything changes so quickly, so the distance between 16 and 21 is way bigger than the one between 23 and 28.” “i don’t know, why don’t you ask irare? forgive yourself and realize it is not your fault you don’t have a future or life didn’t turn out the way you hoped it would. physical affection pretty much defined our relationship for the first 3 months. but as long as he keeps adjusting the age of his women up to compensate his aging, dating will become easier and easier., you might as reasonably have said that he is the tallest man on the show because the men you regard as tall are much different than many of the definitions you’ve seen. dated older men, well always- i did they’re not different from their younger counterparts. i tell people “you will get mental health care” all the time, but then again they want to get disability benefits so they actually listen to me. are assigned to work with someone from another division of your company on a group project.@jrd:me: when i was 18, i did not feel mature enough to be dating a man in his upper 20s or 30s. like the guy i mentioned yesterday, who told me about the constellations and then kissed me. please be smarter than i was about this basic tenet of common sense, because i like you exactly how you are: in one piece. charlotte, correct me if i’m wrong, but between the lines i hear you saying that you are totally open to something real with the right person, not looking to ensure that no guy falls for you.@susanare you really missing the point on why guys go on dates? it’s got a pic of a cheesy 70s era guy – it’s a concealer. if you can’t manage to keep a relationship together for more than a few years but it does happen. (this is not a typical swimsuit choice in boston unless you are at the pool to swim laps. if its dating, then it better damn well be the kind of dating that leaves clothes on. imagine if every possible guy who might ask her out were able to read the following first:“of course i am open to something serious, but i guess what i meant to say is that i expect to date at least two or three guys before i get married, but who knows. apparently gave some epic shit test to some guy when you were 14. old way of dating used to be that people moved as soon as they realized he/she was not “the one. just asking you to not tar all of us with the same brush. agent could only provide an email and enter a whole new country is dating a girl 2 years older bad that develop feelings for me and seeking for a date from period before. all the more reason to stop shaming men in their 30s who are single. – “i current;y have 234 emails which i’m really not interested in reading. one of the 23 year old women i know dating a guy ten years older thought he was 26 or so when they met. i mean, i know: some cute college guy who spells his texts properly and actually seems to wash his face (be still my beating heart) can be pretty tough crush competition for the bros in your 10th grade math class. can lead a whore to culture but you can’t make her think. marriage is a legal contract, and you don’t enter into it until you are sure of your feelings and commitment to a person., at least change your environment before you try to commit suicide. you’re going to leave them on the curb alongside the other garbage bags. speaking of which, got to run because that is literally where i need to be in 20-30 min.”and that’s too bad, because instead of making things better, it’s wallowing in the status quo.’m sure it was surprising and i agree, it is totally out of date, i just think it’s funny how if you change the phraseology by less than 1% it’s totally cutting edge hip pc even though to untrained ears it sounds almost exactly the same. the point is, though, that you did not have sex with multiple candidates at once. i’m certainly not thinking in my head, “oh you are just boyfriend number one of x amount,” if i really do like them, of course i would fantasize a bit about our future. of course i am open to something serious, but i guess what i meant to say is that i expect to date at least two or three guys before i get married, but who knows. think this is not uncommon with artistic types – and this guy did go on to make his living acting and singing.@charlotte“isn’t the whole point of dating/ltr/marriage whatever to find some kind of joy in another and feel excited at least some of the time? to how most 19 and 20 year old guys felt when you were that age and on top of the world. it’s clear that you have fallen hook, line and sinker for one another. are, i am sure, well aware that tons of women between 30-40 find love and happiness, and susan does not say otherwise. to a parent like that, you are an angel temporarily disguised in human form. for the sake of argument, can you explain to me what the difference here would be?“but the judgment goes both ways here, and you can see that in iggles’ comment (sorry to put you on the spot iggles! and women leave college at 22-23, so that means the man will be 28 before he’s become truly proficient in a non-trivial skill learned there – not just competent, proficient. the next day he told me that he hadn’t heard it until 3 a. in many cases, that precipitous drop-off has to do with a natural decrease in testosterone, the male sex hormone that allows you to sustain an erection, ejaculate and have an orgasm. i know quite a few women who are a bit older than their husbands, because they met as peers at grad school, work, etc. the “i miss you” comments are not a daily thing, but when i truly feel like i miss her, i tell her. they can pick up the fight from there, and i’m going to find someplace nice to settle down and ride out whatever is coming, good or bad. – otc said – ““if you don’t like that, ignore those women”the problem is, if you’re a 1 out 5, then you’re ignoring nearly everyone, since it’s relative. i think it’s fair to say that any woman who marries you in future is a fool. but i’m not meeting the guys i want to meet.“so, she’s helping future cooper so that the youthful women know that he’s a good catch. because at least you tried and someone tried with you.“for every year older a man is past a certain age (his physical peak of 28?’t the whole point of dating/ltr/marriage whatever to find some kind of joy in another and feel excited at least some of the time? this means he will leave her a widow for 30+ years, during a time when she has near zero dating value”. what’s the difference between what you’ve been reading and the beta provider bait and switch gambit? you’d have to revoke suffrage, uninvent birth control, and criminalize abortion. i mean, i spent 4+ years with two women i didn’t marry, but most of that time was spent assuming i would marry them when i could. why not choose one of the other dozens of guys? to susan’s point, i should be able to have coffee or even a dinner with a guy a couple times before he is planning our future.@j:“you seem to implying that he was taken advantage of. accepting your faults one thing, but refusing to improve another.”no, that’s how she feels about marrying an ugly but rich old man for his money when you’re not attracted to him.“that would be 15 or 20 seconds they would never forget, let me tell you”foreplay too huh? but the real point is, i’m 42 and my wife is 8 years younger. but that’s not the point- you need to be doing it for you, not because there’s any attention in it. i live in one of nyc’s most fun areas in an adorable apartment that i pay for myself (i fully support myself) and most of my friends are a few years older from work, etc. if you aren’t where you need to be to get what you want, make a plan and get there. one thing women in that age range have said to me is that they get messaged primarily by guys in their own age range, and rarely by guys who are 30 or more. in the mating scene, that’s the same as dating guys for longer than a few dates when you know you don’t want them as a spouse or even a ltr. get to pure window shopping with no “sampling” you’d have to go back to the courting era, which was dead by the 1920s.“you’re not explaining why she looks at sex through the prism of a 7th grader. my reply is, okay, so what tangible results do you have to show for your efforts? and, surely, you must understand that it’s weird that she thinks he would brag to his friends (who she barely knows) about taking her top off.: “should you stay with your girlfriend, and marry her, hoping such a thing never happens again? otherwise, you’re living a lie and robbing me of a real opportunity to marry someone who loves me the way you now love the other woman. i think you underestimate that number of guys that married women who were at best marginally attracted to them, because they didn’t know any better. haven’t you ever experienced events that seem more like you are living in a storybook? the question and the crux of the story line is what direction the alpha guy protagonist will take. the older one has been with the same guy (really really nice guy, by the way) for a few years. so, to you the ‘average’ woman with a few flings under her belt is normal, to me she might as well have an n of 20. based on the comments around here, you’d think that girls never get dumped. – man, if i had a million dollars i wouldn’t be on here, but if you think you can get blood from a turnip, knock yourself out. this suggests more of a switch in attraction triggers, not that that will make the guys that were overlooked feel any better with sloppy thirtieths. an older man *may* have the ability to attract younger women, but this is because he has elevated himself above the majority of other men, younger and older – largely in spite of his age not merely because of it, and he must continue to work at it. is it that younger women started to question your views? every time there is an “end of men” article written by either a male or female they refer to guys gaming in the basement and refusing to grow up. finds their own path– i hope you find what you are looking for. in other words, being the same fat, ugly, sweaty gross guy he was when he was married gives these women a good reason to reneg on an essential element of the marital compact. women will then label these men as guys who are not serious candidates for long-term relationships.’d say, we in central and eastern europe are blessed in that you can find even our feministic protest events quite enjoyable: ukrainian feminists i’d love to … met(per analogy to milf, this would be ufilf). i just found “acceptable” to be an understatement when talking about someone that “a lot of college guys today would love to find but can’t”.(coincidentally, wouldn’t a fun date have a better chance of success than a date where you are putting the pressure on: potential spouse or bust! most people don’t get that lucky, and they wind up dating a few people, which is also ok. but, if you’re interesting in generating a real connection with someone (by that, i mean more than lust! i’m 32 but constantly get told that i look in the mid-20s.@ deti – you need to read this rational male post:@le bieli never thought i’d be happy to link to rollo, but that post on desire is excellent. i feel like on old cartoons when a guy feels like a jerk and his head turns into a big heel or a donkey. you’ve said it yourself, sex without any emotional connection isn’t satisfying, so why are you concerned that you haven’t poked her yet? a failed drug overdose sounds like a better method, if you are going to fail and change your mind. women want young dads just a bit older than they are. the men were ages 25 to 33, and none of them were gay. now i will admit i found the bleach blonde to be hot in a “boner test” kind of way, but that means very little to most guys since lots of women pass that test.