Dating a girl who still lives with her ex

Dating a woman who still lives with her ex

i don´t like them to be walked all over by everone, their ex-girlfriends, their co-workers, their famiiles etc. thing that gets lost here all too often: people don’t always lie because they’re immoral. so i felt rather confident that the only time thad would ever sleep on the couch was when i was bedridden with the flu and throwing up in a bucket. it’s happened to me more than once, and as a result, i’m cautious about getting involved with people who still have an ex actively in the picture, unless there are children involved. i don’t “treat men as if they were untrustworthy until they actually do something untrustworthy,” another a direct quote from this author which i’ve interpreted to mean it’s normal behavior. other words, if you survey a bunch of jealous, low-self esteem people who don’t know how to trust, you are bound to get answers that reflect that.  all i can say is that the ex-gf must be really pretty. husband dating another wo­man, who is also separated but living with her ex. you might end up in a relationship with her, but there’s one problem: she’s best friends with her ex. i waited 6 months while my boyfriend let his ex “save up” to move out.” you need to confront her and you need to listen really carefully when she responds. may have taken your quote out of context, if that’s the case i apologize. to me, it’s not clear that the op and this guy actually are boyfriend/girlfriend or have some kind of commitment to each other. my mother is like this and frankly it can frustrating to deal with someone who is a ‘bleeding heart’. sunday she sent him a text message, saying that he has thirty days to move out. and no, before you go there, i don’t ask my dates to give me the names and phone numbers of past girlfriends for their review. why is it expected that you will trust someone 100% at first sight, but someone who says they love someone and see a future together after six weeks gets blasted off the page? basically, she is living there rent free and has been for 10+ months, so she can save enough to move out (we live in nyc). when i brought up a couple whose daughter played soccer with our girls last season, my soccer pal casually stated, “they split up,” as if revealing that said mutual friend had purchased a new pair of clogs. at some point this ex will know about you but when is he going to tell her?, you mean there’s no test for this kind of stuff? the ex is being a mooch at the very least. we each told other people about the existence of an ex in the house. but they’ve given themselves a get-of-relationship-free card because your unhealthy attitude either makes them less likely to invest emotionally in you in the first place (so you were a placeholder in their mind from the beginning) or they may sincerely like you and thought they could live with your flaws, but in the end your flaws were too much to handle. i thought about it, though, i remembered i’d heard a few months back that it wasn’t exactly paradise in their beige colonial. (or the narcissistic control freak who lived with male roommates but was cheating on me with other women). in a perfect situation, the ex would have moved out shortly after the breakup, but not every situation is black or white. some reason or another, a lot of men can't fathom that another man was sexually intimate with their woman. he does this so that while his live in girl is at work he can have sex dates with other women and the place appears like 2 people of the opposite sex living as roomates instead of lovers. thing i will say is that a man who is happy in his relationship is very unlikely to go back to an ex or cheat. and i would encourage you to to reevaluate your feelings about her light of this new information: your girlfriend lives with an ex who's obviously still hung up on her and who can't be trusted not to murder you in your sleep. i’m not talking about assuming your partner will cheat and therefore perform routine computer/phone checks on them, but what is the harm in being aware of the fact that someone could cheat? was a time when i would have agreed with evan’s advice, as i believe in practicing trust in a relationship until the person proves otherwise.”  if i just met a man and we have no past, no relationship of any kind, and have spent no time together, i will be cautious until he’s had time to earn my trust. he no longer wants to date his ex, but given her financial circumstances, he feels bad throwing her out on the street. i asked him about this and it finally came out that he is living with his ex-girlfriend. top 4 discussions that fathers and sons need to have about life. we didn’t introduce them, because if we were honest we still did have feelings for each other – we just weren’t going forward with them further. in this world, men are not to be trusted, and any situation where a man went back to his ex means that all men want to go back to their exes.

Dating a girl who lives with her ex

 they’re suppose to have moved on and be living separate lives, just sharing space because of economical reasons. so i simply just ignore her but it leaves an akward feeling between the ex and me., i think that’s where everyone goes wrong on here…it’s not about my need to be right; it’s about doing what’s right for each of us, as individuals. tell the guy this looks dodhy – there might be a possibility of a future but the present is not good – no one should be involved in a relationship that brings more doubts, craziness and unhappiness. no one is suggesting he be unkind to the ex, but suggesting that a man or woman keep a new boyfriend/girlfriend a secret is just wrong.’m not quite understanding the part where he always has to stay over at her place for the next couple of months. there are the exes out there we can put an asterisk next to: the ex they still have feelings for. that is why i believe we should always be working on the happiness and health of our relationships as our first priority rather than policing our partners. the red flag to me is that the ex gf doesn’t know about the new gf. for him to cater to her lack of grace (if he’s catering) — i suppose you could read it as him being a “really” nice guy.  this is one of those situations where amy just has to not get too emotionally attached and get ready to eject sooner rather than later. because i was at my ex’s place, i asked my bf to stay in the car while i did what i had to do to not rub it in my ex’s face that i was dating.” however, after four experiences with seemingly decent good guys that i found out had, in fact, cheated (but only after they told me they were leaving me for someone else), i decided i respected myself too much to be walked on and used again.'s my dilemma i need your help with: i started dating my girlfriend back in january 2016, things were going wonderfully until this weekend. but those actions are making me suspicious and i don’t want to be in a relationship where i feel suspicious. fahey and caryn rosenthal, authors of breakup advice book "dumped," agree that it's key to establish fiscal independence before moving in together, so you can be proactive after a breakup.  i have a friend who recently found herself in the same situation as the ex. maybe parading is new girl would be a slap in the face for the ex. we both left for my place and stayed there until sunday. blech…when i moved on from my ex, he could have showed up with the entire hugh heffner entourage and i wouldn’t care because i moved on. have been in, and witnessed, the “ex factor” more times than i want to remember and in every circumstance the newest person to the equation is the one that got screwed. did they all only have brothers (no sisters) — i think men who have sisters, whom they love; if they hate them that’s not good — tend to be more relationship-oriented than men who grew up in an all-boys family.  and why does the current gf gets the burden of knowing about the existence of his ex-gf but the ex doesn’t get the burden of knowing about his current gf? these things happen, and i think after six weeks of dating i would not assume that the author is the ‘girlfriend’ of this guy. the guy who didn’t trust you around your ex?  he must have really loved his ex-gf to allow her to pick his condo at open-houses. karmic equation is right about another thing – no snooping is necessary. dealing with a woman who has an ex in her life is not rocket science, but it takes a lot of awareness and maturity.  then he is either immature or he still has some feelings for the ex. know myself,  and his providing for another woman while dating me just brought out the stress and the worst in me.), or maybe in exchange for free rent, he gets some extra benefits from this ex-gf.  it’s not as if the ex is a child who needs protecting :p. that is something that you need to deal with — but not with him, with her.  men would get the first look at some exes boxers on the floor and amy would be sitting there with no returned phone call wondering what happened binging on sex & the city & dryers! so finding another woman that makes him happier is much easier than trying fix the woman or the relationship., the whole thing comes down to whether you trust him. she hasn’t told her ex abt u, u can’t visit when she’s there – i wiuldn’t allow him to visit me either – the nologer desperate me thinks we deserve better. someone had mentioned that there were always a lot of beer bottles in their recycling bin, which i assumed was a good sign—that once the kids went to bed, they sat on the couch like we did, drinking pale ales and catching up on homeland. other than him not immediately telling her about his living arrangement (when, exactly, was he supposed to discuss this?

Living with an ex: practical, or 'really, really toxic'? -

up is hard to do, as the song goes, but it's even harder when you've signed a lease or taken out a mortgage with the dreaded ex and find yourself trapped with them once the relationship's done."if you go at the right time, there's a very good chance that the relationship can be saved," she said.  either break up and move on, or accept things as they are, don’t complain, etc.  his bedroom is one floor above hers, so we can just stay up there to hang out.  on other, less frequently occurring, days i have to remind myself that i should be thankful.  needless to say, all of her honest boyfriends wearied of this treatment and would break up with her. lw says he’s her “bf” so we’ll have to assume they’ve had the exclusivity talk. news: here's what can help spark a female 'super climax'. he hasn’t told his ex about his new girlfriend, and there is absolutely no reason for him to do so, if (and only if) she is truly his girlfriend (in his mind), he is over his ex, and she is living there on a roommate basis. i’m letting you stay here till the end of the year to save for a new place, i know it’s awkward, but can you meet so she knows the deal.   see evan, he already brought her over to the apartment. does seem to me, after reading the posts, that there really isn’t a disagreement here. my boyfriend of two years habitually stalks other females on facebook. the more important question is, where do you get intimate?  she can wait it out and hope he eventually proposes, or she should think about dating other guys.  as i explained to him, it’s not that i minded the wait though if he had waited a few more minutes, i would have come out and we could all have gone together."i partly agree with helene #6, although i personally wouldn't  " go way further than he is suggesting", but definitely a bit further. they would rather be “right” in their comment board battles than to be effective with actual men. but if i check his computer before he’s had that head’s up and see raunchy emails from some other girl, i’m gone. because any woman with self-esteem would not willingly live with an ex under the same roof, particularly if he broke up with her. and because he’s such a nice guy, he’ll let her cry on it. girlfriend—a woman you've only been dating for eight months—is prioritizing her violent-when-drunk ex-boyfriend's housing needs over your physical and emotional safety. i was married, if i ever got a hint that an ex was in the picture i’d move on. one mom mentioned her neighbor, who was apparently living with her ex-husband full-time because they couldn’t afford separate households.)  i think that he only accepted all her suspicious behaviour bc he knew that he was, in fact, not trust-worthy so her actions actually seemed reasonable to him.. the fact that he moved on and met someone else is not his ex girlfriend’s business.  the love we have for each other is completely worth it. but if you go out with her and she's always talking about the ex, then she obviously still has feelings for him.  i’ve known guys like this, they say ‘oh i haven’t told my ex about you because i don’t want to hurt her, i haven’t gotten around to it yet, etc. not telling the ex-gf about his current gf, he is basically saying that he values his ex’s feelings more than his current gf’s feelings. no woman with high self-esteem, who still has feelings for the guy, will tolerate living in a place where she sees him being with his new lady love. i’m not saying that the boyfriend couldn’t be “tougher” with his boundaries. and her ex are stuck together until their lease runs out, in a little over a month.  one huge thing that helped me feel more comfortable with it was my boyfriend introducing me to his ex, and not hiding me like a dirty secret. do you think he’s capable of “insulting” her by walking away from proferred sex?'s what you need to do when her ex is still in the picture. if i were op, i would want to know more about the context.  at best, he’s too afraid to of his ex-gf. if/when the relationship ends, i would have no problem moving on, but there would be a period of time where one of is is in the process of moving out.

My Boyfriend Shares An Apartment With His Ex But Says It's Platonic

  how can a single man afford all this, and let his ex-gf live there rent free for 10 months. you…ppl here are so mad they didn’t even read the details here.  he is still entangled emotionally with her and he is being sneaky, no ifs, ands, or buts. let’s assume the ‘best’ – that he does not want to bring another woman over out of politeness and deference to his ex. he said he’d sort his ‘shit’ out and we still saw each other until 2 months ago…. i will not go so far to say he is a bad guy, i certainly think there is deception, especially since he is leading the old girlfriend to believe that he is not dating. are women expected to date men with a lower educational level? we sometimes assume others think a lot like us, when they don’t.  he doesn’t seem like he’d cheat on her–besides, he and his ex are barely even awake at the same time! he takes the kids every wednesday and every other weekend. my current bf asked to be exclusive 2 weeks after we started dating.  but girls will put up with a lot of ccrap from rich guys they really like. you know is that you “feel” that something is off because he hasn’t told his ex-girlfriend about the new girl he’s dating.  what is he trying to prevent by keeping his current gf a secret from his ex-gf? other awful situation is i do know the ex (not very well) and his family and see them and they don’t know we’ve been in a relationship either.’s expensive, way too expensive to be sure, but ppl just cut in other areas to make it work.  why must he lie (omit the truth, spin the truth, whatever you prefer to call it) to protect the ex’s feelings?  in conclusion, keeping an ex around (even if you think you’re being ‘helpful’) is selfish.  if they were, then why would he not bring his new girlfriend around? this is not something that a girl (or a guy—it goes both ways, of course) can know for a fact with 100% certainty if they haven’t even shared a single conversation over a cup of coffee yet.  if that is all this is, op, a nice guy being nice to an ex, hang on to him.  there have been other such occasions but this was probably the worst. unless a relationship ends via cheating, which normally causes bad feelings in the cheated upon… both people in the relationship usually still harbor feelings of like and love for the other person. a lot of women come with bad friends, a lot of women come with a job they don't like, but there's nothing more difficult for the male ego to deal with than a woman who comes with her ex as a best friend. after considering evan’s and some other commenters’ arguments, i’ve softened my stance a little. i did think it was strange he hadn’t brought her over to his place and introduced her to his ex/roommate, but then i saw, they’ve only been dating 6 weeks! but does anyone consider that the gentleman might still be involved with his ex?, i don’t think the ex is a nurse, i met a couple strippers they live in manhattan rent free! in fact, i just look at him as a furry girlfriend of hers. if you were 100% right, stacy, there wouldn’t be another side for me to argue. is boyfriend really verifying that she’s making a good faith effort to get her finances squared away and move out, or is this a potentially interminable situation that he will let.  i’d love to hear the advice if the situation was switched around and amy was living with her ex. do guys send text messages to keep in touch while dating? so my bfriend and his ex are very good friends but not in a relationship now she is angry and ignore me and does not speak to me when i visit there and my bfriend does not want to choose sides between us.@evan: actually, there is a test for this kind of stuff. intentionally he told me he was going to tidy the house up and put it on the market but he’s been struggling with jobs and financially he’s struggled so as i gather the ex pays most of the bills.  i want to more details about the guy, but there is more to this story. couples are separating and still living together, even waving to each other as one heads out on a date. because of my past experiences it takes me a little longer than it might for a “100% truster,” but i do get there.

Is This Nuts? More Couples Living Together After Divorce

apt is amy’s bf’s place, the ex-gf needs to respect his space, not the other way around because she’s living off his good will already. "you cannot live together after your romance has fallen apart, or you cannot live together for very long.  she made it her priority to find somewhere else to live. you get into a fight, and she calls her ex to talk about it, because he just knows her really, really well. i am surprised by the overwhelming suspicion that he may be involved with his ex, or that something shady is going on. love letter of the day: my girlfriend lives with her ex-boyfriend and that's not the problem. i also pointed to him his exgirlfriend is a trouble maker. plus, if he were a liar, he probably wouldn’t have told the op about his situation, much less told her that he hasn’t mentioned her yet. the guy kicks the woman out of the bedroom so much she has to have a make shift bedroom just to get sleep on the nights he don’t want to recycle her for sex.  he eventually brought the op to the apartment, presumably when the ex wasn’t there.  there is a reason why this man did not tell his ex about you and there is a reason why you have never met her. red flag isn’t that he’s still cohabitating with his ex, but rather that he hasn’t told his ex about you.” to me, the whole point of dating is to gather more info about him to decide if he is trustworthy. claims that they do not have feelings for each other and hardly see each other since he works long daytime hours and she works nights. i got out of his room i immediately went upstairs and told my girlfriend what had just happened, and i told her i wasn't comfortable staying at her place for the weekend, and that i was going to go home and she could come stay at my place if she didn't feel safe in her own home. op, once you spend some time to get a good sense of his character and it is indeed true that he is just being a nice guy, the question to ask is if it is at your expense, can you handle it?  a guy i dated in ’09 found an old belt of my ex from years prior and i heard about that belt for at least a month.: black lives matter’s “black only” meetings aren’t racist.  i don’t think he owes his ex anything emotional at this point. but she figured it had to be confounding for the little girls when, last winter, their parents—just the mom and the dad—took them skiing at camelback.  there are men out there who leave their exes where they belong… in the past. if i were the new girlfriend i would try and accept the circumstances and be the cool girl for awhile.  but she also realizes she has competition from his pre-existing live-in girlfriend. i would hope he would say something more concrete like “i’ve told her she needs to be out by the end of the year”. mike byhoff, who lived with his ex for three weeks after breaking up, said they ended up becoming good friends as a result. i have to say i agree about the ‘not telling the ex red flag’. she owns her house and rents out rooms to three individuals. when i asked him when is she moving out, he just said, “maybe the end of the year”, which is still 4 months away. or believe there is a hidden agenda and break things off. on friday night, her ex was home and was super drunk when i arrived at her place.“maybe in exchange for free rent, he gets some extra benefits from this ex-bf. there is no way for a woman to know what a man’s character is until he’s shown her, and i believe you agree with me.  isn’t it to be expected that you will date other people 10 months after a breakup? frankel's comments put a spotlight on the fact that more and more couples who move in together have been forced to maintain their living situation after a breakup, usually for financial reasons.  this was about a possessive girl who is trying to turn a “casual relationship” into something with a future.  i respect the men i dated enough to not carry old relationships into my current one and i expect the same. people, particularly men, aren’t going to say no to easy sex being offered. see, dating is this process whereby two people spend time together to form an opinion as to whether or not they share common interests, enjoy each other’s company, and bond over shared experiences. no one periodically sleeps on the other person’s couch. Flirtspruche sms an manner

Savage Love Letter of the Day: My Girlfriend Lives With Her Ex

 i completely understand why an ex may still be co-habitating in some situtions, but once the guy has a new girlfriend their is no way the new girlfriend should have to live like a dirty little secret. means, either way, she needs to be gone from his place for the lw to have peace of mind. during that 6 months, while she swore she couldn’t possibly swing rent, she went on a few vacations (including a month abroad), enjoyed several high-end shopping sprees, and treated herself to new electronics and computers.  i really don’t think i would have gotten that reaction if she still had any lingering feelings left.  but, they lived farther than he had initially thought and he took a wrong turn on the way back.  i just hope you figure out what his motivation is sooner rather than later. the reality is, in time if you get closer, he will have to chose you over her but when will he step up?  even, if he is a good-guy, she shouldn’t waste her time on someone who won’t publicly acknowledge her as his official girlfriend.  she’s not even there all that much anyway due to her work schedule, and has been spending more time lately in her home state to arrange a job transfer there (really does seem intent on moving out and has taken concrete steps to make that happen).  and while they are only dating for 6 weeks, he should at least be close to asking new girl if she wants to be in a relationship., when there are tell tale signs, you need to break up with him, but without snooping. lemon has a catchphrase for that:For the record: liz lemon is wrong about bisexuality and bisexual erasure is not okay and tina fey should be ashamed of herself for thinking that was funny and bisexuals absolutely do have a sense of humor and i never really liked 30 rock and one of the above is a lie. however i do have a friend who went through a similar thing recently – the guy she was dating still lived with his ex, and he swore there was nothing between them, and initially that seemed to be true..Bethenny frankel and husband jason hoppy are still living together, even though they are divorcing.) and so he feels like he should help her out. when one person is still tied to a former partner, even if only (or especially) by a shared living space, the new relationship exists in a kind of gray area, or at least it would for me.  there’s something a bit unnatural about the situation to me if there is no plan for remediation.  this boyfriend owns a 2 bedroom condo on a single man’s salary, and he is letting his ex-gf live there for free while she works nights (waitressing or dancing? i told her i don't feel safe around him sober or not and i never want to see him again, additionally i will never go over to her house if he is still living there. for example, did they all want to be exclusive quickly? the ex can’t do this, then she doesn’t deserve his generosity. she can always tell him to look her up when the ex is gone. it’s nyc, odds are the apartment isn’t big and it would be awkward for the ex to be sharing the bathroom for the new gf. of course we want the right to keep valued exes in our life. you need to sit her down and say, “listen, i don't think you're over him at all. i’d also be bothered by the boyfriend saying he ,”…feels bad for her because he knows what it’s like to be on your own and how scary that is”. couch a few nights a week and getting to have sex with other women vs. but what everyone keeps missing here is that i’m not saying to a guy on our first date, “hi, i’m wendy, and i don’t trust you. you may want to fix your own picker before you start passing advice on to others about theirs. i have to defer to my personal experience and will be cautious and alert in my future relationships.  in a lot of expensive areas ppl will spend their 20’s and sometimes even part of the 30’s renting with roommates so they can afford a down payment. ex lived with me and my girls for a year and a half. love letter of the day: horny feminist seeks porn that won't destroy her faith in humanity.'s not alone in her predicament — real housewives of atlanta star portia williams recently revealed she and her soon-to-be-ex-husband are also still living together while they sort out their divorce, and fellow bravo reality star vicki gunvalson remained roommates with her ex-husband long after their split. a couple out in wayne did the same thing, but bought a small studio apartment nearby where each parent stayed on his or her off-time.  it turns out that there was a family who asked him for a quarter so they could make a phone call about their car which had broken down., most of us are not in a profession where our lives are on the line every day. it sounds a little out there i know, but if you could change your attitude towards this around, you would definitely start having better experiences. the guy i’m dating has been trying to bring me to gatherings/events where his friends are from the time we began dating, but i’ve never tried to bring him to meet my friends, because i think having mutual friends can make relationships messy. Flirten met getrouwde mannen

I am dating a girl who lives with her ex-boyfriend and his parents. Is it

 since i was only going from car to store and back, i hadn’t bothered with any warm clothing. get it: it’s certainly inconvenient – for both you and him – to have her in his space, but, if your relationship is strong, this arrangement won’t last forever. thinking about the mental gymnastics, the anguish assuming a man will cheat seems so exhaustive. sussman, a relationship therapist and author of "the breakup bible: the smart woman's guide to healing from a breakup or divorce", says she started seeing more instances of ex-couples co-habitating when the recession started back in 2008. particularly if he already doesn’t have the balls to tell her to get out and give her a timeline."i was trying to move on and date other people and he was trying to sabotage that," she told today. the guy is really that generous, i am truly surprised and good for the ex.  i live in a metropolis and while it’s bad here, it’s not impossible.'s something liz gannon might wish she had done, instead of living with her ex-boyfriend for three more months after they split because he couldn't find another apartment he could afford. evidently, when you say he’s a “liar,” you don’t mean that he’s actually lying to the op, but simply not informing his ex-girlfriend that he’s been seeing someone.  hey i’ve met this girl, i don’t know what will happen in the future, but i want honesty from the start, so i’d like you to meet her.  poster didn’t indicate whether they were exclusive or not. in other words, if you have an unhealthy emotional and psychological outlook towards men, then only men who will tolerate that unhealthiness would want to be in a relationship with you.” yeah, but she talks about her ex constantly, and she's always complaining about the girl that he’s dating.  they live together and her boyfriend recently broke up with her.  i really sensed no jealousy from her whatsoever and she really seemed happy for him that he has a new girlfriend, like any of his other friends. we didn’t last but his ex had nothing to do with it. the guy in this situation could be the one who ended the relationship, so he may feel callous if he parades the new girlfriend around his ex. i trust him 100% so when i go over my boyfriend and i cook our dinner together and watch tv in the lounge and his ex also sits there and she keeps on telling when they were a couple they did this and that and she keeps making eye contact with him which i find akward.“wow,” i said, nodding my head as if their arrangement was totally ordinary, as if i’d had the very same conversation with three other moms in the bakery aisle minutes before. but the longer the ex stayed with him, the more that changed until he and her were going on holidays together, going to parties together, and eventually were once again involved. her story was better: the couple also divorced and stayed in the same cherry hill house, but when the dad started dating a friend of theirs, the mom got upset and set him up with one of her friends. on the dad’s off-weekends, he stays at his girlfriend’s house and the mom’s boyfriend moves in. you get to have sex all you want with whomever you want. it’s been my experience on this blog that you must always have 100% trust with each new relationship or you will get blasted off these pages., the fact that the boyfriend and the ex are still living together implies that the break-up is very recent, so i’d be concerned that one or both have not moved on. dated a guy once who had his ex living with him at first. whenever you meet a woman who is really great friends with her ex, she'll usually tell you, “hey, max and i are like best friends. 2 months after my divorce with my ex was finalized, i had to go over to his place to either drop off something or pick up something and my bf came with me. they forego intimacy for the sake of his niceness to his ex? or the guy who understands that living with your ex is purely circumstantial?  i would say that at 6 weeks it is still too early for him or her to get serious and monogamous. (by the way, they got back together and are now married with a kid. i put myself in the position of the op’s boyfriend and ask what i would do, and i give advice from there. you don’t want to get jealous, but it really bugs you when the ex calls and she giggles to herself for the next five minutes because of something he said."i think when a man wants "more space" like this and wants to step back you should go way further than he is suggesting. if she hasn’t moved out on her own, she has an agenda. if she gives you the evil eye when you’re there or avoids you when you’re there, you can tell him that she still has feelings and take it from there. she stood her ground and told him that he had to move out.

Is Your Partner Over His or Her Ex? Past Relationships and

   evan, there is a reason for it and in my opinion, it is not good. if one person can't afford to move out, sussman recommends working together since both halves of a former couple benefit from being able to live separately. so, amy, would you rather give him an ultimatum to kick her out in the next 30 days, or continue to enjoy this relationship for the next four months, with him sleeping at your place? the ex girlfriend then told my boyfriend i feel uncomfortable when she is around and she is around most of the time. he said he wanted to show me something in his room and we went down to his room and he pulled a knife on me and asked me a bunch of questions about my current girlfriend, aka his ex and current landlord. to burst your bubble clare, but a study by helen fisher, phd, a biological anthropologist at rutgers, found that 56 percent of men and 34 percent of women who cheated on their spouses claimed to be happy or very happy in their marriages. now, don't forget — we’re talking about the ex she's "just friends" with. but i’m not going to trust the ex one bit. however, i would require firmer boundaries in the form of a due date for her to move out. he shouldn’t have to “walk on eggshells” around his ex-gf in his own place.” soccer pal asked, so incredulous that i momentarily wondered if the news had been posted on the township facebook page: “there was a burglary on virginia avenue.. maybe the ex girlfriend does not care to meet the new person he is dating. a relationship author, i took the time to do a survey on the ‘ex factor’ to study how people feel about having exes involved in a current relationship.  the people who do this are willing to put their current partner in an awkward situation and behind another person’s needs. the question is whether the relationship with the ex is actually threatening to the relationship.  i was also annoyed that i didn’t rate even a simple text to let me know he was leaving.- i wasn’t trusted when there was no reason to distrust me and that very quickly led to the end of the relationship. are a couple of things that would concern me here: the first is the vagueness of the comment that the ex will be out by the end of the year. i’m glad you are able to re-cast these good samaritan episodes not as him forgetting about you; i will admit i still struggling with being able to put that spin on things. other thing that your argument completely omits is that a good man, the sort of man you would want to be with, when he senses that you trust him implicitly (and here, i am not talking about childilike, naive blindness which is what you describe it as – i am talking about adult trust where you not only trust him to make good decisions, you also trust yourself to know how to act in the face of any situation, and hence you know you’ll be ok) – a good man then strives to earn this trust. hate spam as much as you do, therefore i will never sell, rent, or give away your email address.  while the participant’s varied on whether or not their own exes should be in their lives while they have a new relationship, everyone who took the survey did not want a partner who still had an ex in their life. am in a similar situation met a great guy we have a fantastic relationship and his ex is now living in a separate room in his house. one time he texted a guy i was dating from my phone and made a series of strange statements, including a marriage proposal. while ago my famous ex boyfriend lawyer stop to have sex with me because he needs to do some therapy to find himself, well he end up leaving me for the therapist, and end up she is a lesbian with s girlfriend,  she used him, well he deserved call,  karma lol. if this guy really likes this woman, he will make it work out for his “new girlfriend”, not his old girlfriend. you can either believe he is a good person and the ex will be out of there in a few months. and while you say you love this girl, knife, and love is lovely, and i love love, i would argue that you didn't really know this girl until today.…"sparklingemerald on what do men get out of looking at other women?, from where i sit, this sounds like a sweet, generous, sensitive guy.’s great for you, clare, if that has been your experience. do i do with a boyfriend who lets his daughter exclude me? doing the same thing again and again while expecting different results is insane, but i shouldn’t have to tell you that. women do like successfully employed and charismatic men, among other qualities. and the pattern is either in the men you pick or in your behavior during the relationship. TV star Bethenny Frankel is the latest celeb to speak out about the situation: she's still sharing her New York City apartment with estranged husband Jason Hoppy, though the pair are gettingHome > blog > communication > my boyfriend shares an apartment with his ex but says it’s platonic. since it is indeed a complication, and the op isn’t that far in, i like the suggestions i’ve seen here that encourage her to continue to see him if she wants, but to also see others and not invest too much. ke said, the flag for me is the choice of words: “he does not want me there when she is there”. but he trusts her when she says she’s working late (until midnight, even though she doesn’t have that kind of job), getting her nails done on the weekend (for 8+ hours), etc.

Living with Exes: When the relationship ends, but the co-habitation

and even if we believe he’s a saint, i’m not inclined to believe it of the ex-gf..Would you rather give him an ultimatum to kick her out or continue to enjoy this relationship for four months, with him sleeping at your place? you had to live with your ex, maybe you’d prefer to parade your new bf around in front of him, but i like to think i have a little more concern for others’ feelings than that. i would be interested to know whether he is keeping things deliberately a bit casual, or whether he is moving the relationship forward enthusiastically, as i think this says a lot about his intentions and where he is at. knows, maybe you’ll one day be the beneficiary of this gentleman’s extraordinary patience and generosity. up is hard to do, as the song goes, but it's even harder when you've signed a lease or taken out a mortgage with the dreaded ex and find yourself trapped with them once the relationship's done.. i would definitely pull back from this situation until i could get a clearer reading on exactly what their relationship is. i am about to throw myself into bad light, but i had never had a guy, be it my ex or present boyfriend who did anything without some sort of expectations back., i’m really trying to be open and to see your point of view, and i re-read your response twice, but i can’t deny that i agree with the others in the comments. i was going to agree with you that him not introducing his new girl to his live-in ex was a huge red flag, but then you gave the example of how you were with your ex, so now i’m thinking maybe the boyfriend is doing the same thing. i got so fed up from hearing it and told her it is time to put the past behind her and move on he is in a new relationship with new beginings. it wasn’t like kristen and i were bffs, but her cell number was programmed into my phone. out how to deal with your new girlfriend's ex-boyfriend with these tips..Once upon a time, i had a client break up with her boyfriend because, among other things, he lent ,000 to a girlfriend who never paid him back. so maybe you should back off of being “sure” and consider the possibility that what the op wrote is actually what’s happening – he is not kicking his ex out until she can afford her own place, and he is not bringing another woman over out of politeness and deference to his ex. what if he bought new underwear because he decided his awesome girlfriend deserves to be with a decent guy who dresses properly? was talking about sex, but i pretended he was talking about those special married-people moments, like the side-hugs we give each other when we witness one of our children doing something nice, like almost punching a sibling but deciding at the last minute not to. "we slept in the same bed for three weeks, had dinner together, and told each other about our days," he told today. example, do you have behaviors only men with big issues of their would want to date? line is that, yes, there are different levels of trust. aniston and vince vaughn famously played a pair of exes stuck living together in 2006's 'the break-up.  sometimes it’s slightly at my expense, that’s all. week later he had a special event to attend and he had to let me know because of facebook that he’d taken his ex because it was nice for her birthday? while this may be plausible, can’t it also be plausible that he is merely being a good guy who is no longer with his ex due to certain reasons, but still cares about her well-being, wants the best for her, and is kind enough to protect her broken heart by not shoving his new girl in her face? yet tells the live in girl how much he loves her during the nice period and they share the bedroom and how much he hates her and hits her during naughty period. i’m saying that if he has to sleep at the ops place for a few months while the ex finds a new apartment, it’s a pretty small price to pay. and if she has the power to make him want to protect her “emotions” 10-months after they’ve broken up, you don’t think she can manipulate him into having sex with her? he’s her bf, he needs to prioritize her needs over his ex’s.. my clients pay me because they suspect that there’s something they’re doing that isn’t “effective.  maybe ex-girlfriend still harbors feelings for him and he knows it and doesn’t want to upset her. so for us, trusting other human beings is/should be the norm. if anything, the way he treated his ex and his desire to have his son stay close made him seem even better to me.!"john texts me crazy wonderful love texts to start and end every day. to say less than 10 months thought b/c the ex gf moved in when she and the op’s bf were together. but i will continue to tell my 17 year old niece that she should never let a guy pick her up from her place for a first date, but rather meet him there and to let someone know the who/what/where/when of it. when there is no deadline, the “end of the year” can quickly become april, may, june, etc. the ex knows she’s an ex and understands the generosity being handed to her, then she won’t mind and introduction to the new girlfriend. and per evan’s own teachings there are plenty of fish in the sea. if he’s platonic with the ex-gf, why keep the new girl a secret?Dear Thelma: My lover still lives with her ex -   for all she knows, he could have a child he is hiding from her.  but i would definitely want to know what the plan is: is she saving up for a down payment so she can buy her own place (how long is this likely to take), is she hunting for rentals and when one that meets her criteria becomes available she will move or are they both comfortable with the status quo for an indeterminate amount of time? that’s an excellent comparison to why an honest guy should put up with being mistrusted. to spread out in the entire bed and still have a pseudo-live-in homework helper?  if the roles were reversed and the man wasn’t being made to feel “special” and “good” about himself when he was with her and he was having doubts brought on by her actions and behavior, you’d tell him to cut his losses and find someone who makes him feel like number 1. maybe they are cordial with each other, but again, the ex girlfriend may not care to bother with the new girl.), she doesn’t seem to express concern about his behavior. she’s friends with the ex and you all go out together and you see no sexual chemistry, then you're fine. i am not a fan of those kinds of demands unless the ppl in question are doing something beyond just existing…as in, are you just mad b/c your bf has a close female friend, or is she deliberately cold to you? when you’re in the presence of your girl and her ex, you’ll see the dynamic between them and realize that there’s nothing left. too many fish in the sea to tie myself to a fish that is already hooked into another line. she then told my bfriend while i am not there she thinks i am still having a affair with  my ex who is also living with me and he does not bring up our past relationship when my bfriend visits and she thinks i am insecure. for us non-cop/non-military daters, we don’t need to live our lives every day in fear that our trust is going to kill us. i don’t understand what is so difficult to understand about this concept, especially when you seem to be agreeing with me, except the part about beginning with full trust. you’re right,” instead of restating the exact same misguided thing you wrote above about how i’m advocating you date an untrustworthy man.  well, for the first 10 minutes, i kept thinking there was something i was missing and that i would find him any second. we’ve all see when harry met sally…and that happened when they didn’t live together. forget what you have learned from your past experiences–that applies to every other life scenario except relationships. he doesn’t want the environment in his home even more uncomfortable with his old girl meeting his new… especially if the ex is still single or if he is the one who initiated the break-up. "hang in there if you are feeling despair – if this 60 year old english professor can find love, i suspect you can too! i’m not sure yet if it’s helping him re-focus and say “no” to other people once in a while, but i hope so. i might have to rethink the relationship, if the end of the year came and went and the old girlfriend was still around.  the guy who married her and “put up with” her mistrust turned out to be a cheating liar (they are now divorced. you’re still getting irritated about the direction of the toilet paper or eating the last piece of pizza or whatever. it's monday, and i talked with my girlfriend today and she told me that she had a long conversation with him and now is going to give him a second chance. i actually feel bad for the women here who do that. kristen was holding down two jobs to bring home extra cash. it kills me to see him be so stupid, but he trusts her.  so, he is willing to bring this new girl to his apartment, he is just not willing to admit (yes, this is what it is) to the old girlfriend that he is dating out of ‘deference’. "since we knew it was only a temporary situation, we kind of avoided the elephant in the room that we were broken up but still living together.  i'm also, i think it is a bad idea for people to move in to an existing home. will this ex still be in his life or will he cut her out? perhaps he’s just protecting his emotionally fragile ex instead of rubbing her face in the fact that he’s kicking her out and dating someone else.. some of us have had  a version of this same situation in one way or another, over and over. partner still lives with his girlfriend of 15 years and they own a house….  if you do trust him and he’s great otherwise, give him a chance. look at him and treat him as you would any other guy. you don’t trust a stranger on the street the same way you trust your mother and father.  i just don’t see this relationship lasting longer than 3 months, and he will dump her by then. Single frau was tun

Partnersuche auf wissenschaftlicher basis

each parent takes responsibility for their two daughters a few nights a week and every other weekend.…"evan marc katz on what do men get out of looking at other women? pretty sure this ex didn’t move in after she and bf broke up. but those actions are making me suspicious and i don’t want to be in a relationship where i feel suspicious. during the holidays, the four of them would be at the same neighborhood parties together. it’s not too far fetched that comfort he gives her leads to sex. our relationship didn't work out sexually at all, but we're still such really good friends. he would look through my phone and facebook which he had frequent access to since we were still living together in order to find out who i was seeing. they don’t really think anything of it,” my friend explained.  initially, i thought he had either parked or was taking a turn around the parking lot to avoid being in the way of other people. man often does not tell woman that she argues too much, that she’s too distrustful, that her need to always be right made them nuts themselves. no one is suggesting you go down a dark alley naked with a rape me sign (except for you in your poorly considered parallels). or maybe he is the one who initiated the breakup, so he doesn’t want to shove her already broken heart into a blender. even if you catch him in the actual act of having sex with another woman, if he tells you he’s not cheating, you must trust him. then there was the dad who moved out but came over every morning before the kids woke up to cook them breakfast. think she should relax and enjoy her relationship for now–he will probably introduce them in due time. i had no idea that publicly acknowledging someone as an official girlfriend meant parading her in front of the ex. example, i seem to tend to pick men who have unhealthy relationships with money, either too cheap or too careless with it. i imagine my divorce—and i imagine my divorce roughly once a week, typically when i find a beer glass soaking in the sink again, as if beer glasses need to soak and can’t, for the love of god, just be placed directly into the dishwasher—it does not look like kristen’s at all. on our second date we spent 8 hours together just walking and have seen him consistently 2 or even 3 times a week for about 6 weeks. just wanted to write exactly the same words as you. also, he has not told her about me and does not want me there when she is there.!, yes they don’t mind the ex dating someone else, as long they can live for free for a while and oblivious the ex getting sex as a payment,  which they don’t care. if neither one has feelings for the other, then why is he trying to protect her emotionally? and it shouldn't be in a fake, reactive way either, but it's a go…"nat on can a relationship be successful when you go from living together to living apart?: teacher, 8-year-old student killed in san bernardino elementary school shooting. it’s one thing to have a kind and generous boyfriend and another to have a guy who can’t or won’t set the right boundaries and priorities.)"nat & helene,I think what you are saying (and i completely agree) is that instead of katie passively waiting around to see what her boyfriend wants to do, she should use her own agency to figu…"gowiththeflow on can a relationship be successful when you go from living together to living apart? perhaps his ex knows he is seeing other people, but he finds no reason to have the two meet., i do understand the idea that you may seek out advice and not be completely ready to leave if there are no clear cut reasons to do so.  i guess we’rw not seeing the entirety of the situation but is he keeping new girl from other people in his life?  the op is in a tough position though – maybe give it another couple of months and see how you feel. like her demand to me isn’t really her to make but odds are, she’s been around for a much shorter time. close proximity, and let’s assume as you do, that he broke up with her, don’t you think that she could get a little weepy and vulnerable one night and need his shoulder to cry on. so my picker works as my exhusband wanted to save the marriage; my last two bf’s still want to get back together with me. he became involved with someone else while he was still living the house, i think she was very insecure about him living with me and eventually they moved in together. she knows you still live here, and that’s a big thing. my relationships ended because *i* ended them (all except 1 in my 20’s). other option is to believe that he’s serious (if they’re parting, then the ex is likely no threat, especially if he ended it. Sdp2 dating alys perez epilogue 2 | She Still Lives With Her Ex - YouTube   however, his house is also pretty large so it might not be the exact same situation here (which is an apartment and presumably has less space to work with).  the red flag is the fact that “also, he has not told her about me and does not want me there when she is there. cultivate the virtues necessary to handle this like a man, and you separate yourself from the boys at home in unsatisfying relationships who are crying about their woman and her furry friend.= manhattan…there are places to live in nyc more affordable than manhattan.  better to get a new plac…"l on can a relationship be successful when you go from living together to living apart?’s actually a good exit strategy to let a distrustful woman know that he’s leaving her for someone else because his behavior validates her world view (that men can’t be trusted) and he can count on her self-righteous anger to nail that relationship coffin shut."i also discovered that i could attract a ton of quality men, in no time at all, if i needed to go back out there. who knows, maybe you’ll one day be the beneficiary of this gentleman’s extraordinary patience and generosity. since there is, i would submit you should proceed with a little more humility and understanding, instead of assuming the worst in people. if ppl were reading they’d clearly understand that if the ex gf has been in the apartment rent-free for 10+ months that when she moved in, they were probably dating.  if it’s a red flag for someone not to introduce a girlfriend to their friends why is it not a red flag to avoid telling the live in ex? bfriend and i have discussed it and i explained it is not her presence that makes me uncomfortable it is the past between them. we’ve exchanged “i love you’s”, we’ve met each other’s parents, gone on vacations together and…. the ex may be a bit crazy and unpredictable, so he’s trying to prevent an opportunity for a blowup.  example: once, my husband, then boyfriend, left me in the parking lot of a grocery store for 20+ minutes without any communication.  i wouldn’t expect a deadline…that is not realistic and is counter productive.. i have had to much life experience, i guess, to not question a situation like this. a person can set a deadline whilst still being a kind and generous individual. story short, i guess the takeaway here is if you want to blindly trust, that’s your choice.  we know this bf is hiding his roommate exgf and won’t allow amy to come over to his apt. i’m not talking about “parading ” new girlfriend in front of the ex, or rubbing the new love into the face of the ex… far from it. but i do know that the question i would have about the guy you’re seeing isn’t about whether he’s up to anything fishy, but simply whether he has the balls to give his ex a deadline for getting her act together and moving out. at a cookout last year, my friend amy (wife of joe, mother of three) shared the gooey details of her friend’s situation. he is 53, but i am here to tell you 53 can be pretty damn impressive. there should be no sexual energy or sexual chemistry between them at all.) and if i sense something is wrong, i do a little “research” (everyone else here calls it “snooping”). there’s always the possibility of baggage when you start dating someone new.  in this day and age where it is not particularly easy to find someone who we adore mentally, physically, spiritually along with other variables such as right timing, etc…i think if a person finds someone with all of these parameters but there are one or two issues where you are not even sure if they are issues, you may want to figure out the answer first instead of just moving along and leaving that person behind.  you can’t have a future with a guy who tells her don’t visit my apartment ever. commenters who post here – and i appreciate them – often haven’t (and will never) pay me a dollar for my advice. in this transitional period, i would not introduce a new guy to the ex for several reasons:1. i had almost given up on him (and us) when she found some other sucker to leach off of and moved in with him. instead of goin…"helene on can a relationship be successful when you go from living together to living apart? they live in a world of fantasy where the right guy always does what you want him to do, and has no previous entanglements that can potentially complicate his life. i feel betrayed by both of them and this is where i need your help. my current boyfriend was afraid to tell his ex about me because he did not want to hurt her feelings which i did not care much, but after spending one night at his place and him being nervous because she might stop by, i told him that i am not exclusive with him until he talks to her. he needs to let her wait till the end of the year, ok, but i’d only remain the gf if we were introduced.  if it’s a tiny space, i can understand that there isn’t space for 3 people to spend the night comfortably.  why does he care so much what his ex-gf thinks? Feeling guilty dating after death spouse | Her Ex-Boyfriend - AskMen   even if they are broken up, they could be fwb and have sex every once in a while just to release some stress.  yes, the fact that he cares about his ex-gf is wonderful, but he shouldn’t do that at the expense of his new gf, who should be his future., where exactly are the places in nyc that a single man can buy a 2 bedroom condo, that is near the subway?  you can’t simply dismiss the fact that there are ted bundys out there just because you aren’t one of them. lived with my ex in our co – owned house for 9 months after we split up, it was for financial reasons and we have a child together.  there is nothing wrong with status quo, it just wouldn’t work for me. as someone else said, the fact that the ex is still living in the house means that the relationship is just finished so one wonders whether the guy is ready for a new relationship or he just wants to play. he’s treating his ex the way i would hope you’d treat your best friend. you believe in law of attraction at all, there’s a principle that would say that your distrust is in fact attracting into your life men who will prove your distrust right, and also attracts the reasons for the distrust. and if i am not starting with full trust, what exactly are you, wendy, doing while you don’t trust me? unless the new girl is hotter than the old girlfriend, then i he might stay with the new girl. she’s a newish, maybe exclusive gf who is mad that the guy she is dating won’t toss his ex out on the street.)"this article is like saying toddlers for the past 10,000 years have been using their hands to eat, it is therefore biological for them to eat with their hand, & they are at odds with nature if usi…"lovedforme on what do men get out of looking at other women?“my cousin’s story is better than that,” another mom cooed, as if we weren’t talking about people, but about who got the better scratch-off coupon in that week’s mailer from kohl’s.  there is either something wrong with his situation or if i was the ex i would wonder why he felt the need to keep a new girlfriend a secret. see trust as having to be earned, and unfortunately there’s no short cut: it takes time. “you might not be technically married, but you still have to deal with all the stupid little sucky stuff about being married. couples who simply can't find another option than living together after a break-up, fahey and rosenthal stress that setting rules can help during the moving-on process. we’re talking about people here, most of whom can’t be trusted to use their turn signals let alone to not break your heart.  and if by that time, you still do not think he is worth 100% of your trust, you end it. "needless to say, seeing your ex on a daily basis is really hard, especially if you still have feelings for him or her," she said. you are indeed his gf as you think, and the only reason she’s still living with him is for financial reasons, which implies they no longer have a relationship where he’s obligated to worry about her being jealous of you — then he should introduce the both of you and let that galvanize her into moving out. up to receive new blog posts straight to your inbox:Can a relationship be successful when you go from living together to living apart?”  so he can string a girl along, and have a convenient excuse not to commit. depending on the circumstances, i might tell him to give me a call once the ex has moved out but that until then i wouldn’t feel so comfortable with dating him. you take it will depend on how he reacts to your notifying him that she still has feelings for him. i will continue to lock my doors at night and i will continue to be aware of the possibility that ignorance of the facts of life, that bad people do exist, can break your heart at best, kill you at worst. of course there will be other factors, but this one common trait in them is telling to me.’ve never given anything to a woman with an expectation of getting something in return. another friend knew a recent villanova divorcée who hosted her ex-husband—and his new girlfriend—for rosh hashanah because, she said, “the kids should be able to look across the table at a holiday meal and see their whole family.  but, this ‘deference’ could only be possible if there was an implication that he was disrespecting the ex or offending her. could no longer handle him staying in with his ex on saturday nights etc and not seeing me and being a secret any longer so ended it.’d just seen them together at dunkin’ donuts, all of them, including the four kids.  to be sure, it is not as nice as the place she just left but it’s not bad and it is her own.’ and half the time the ex isn’t really an ex at all.. if this woman feels very uncomfortable in this situation(which she does), then i think this man should listen if he cares to keep her a budding romance. gilroy and her boyfriend are still living in the same apartment, despite ending their relationship two months ago. i see nothing in op’s letter that indicates that the boyfriend has an inappropriate relationship with his ex, but these short-term situations have a funny way of becoming long-term situations. i recalled jolly laughter and the aura of bona fide togetherness-ness. Best photos for internet dating | Living with an ex: practical, or 'really, really toxic'? - i love this girl, but now i'm apprehensive about continuing a relationship with her.  why would he not want to acknowledge a new girlfriend after 10+ months of being single? pay attention to her body language and the words she uses. he said that he feels bad for her because he knows what it’s like to be on your own and how scary that is. him not telling her about you and making sure you guys don’t run into each other? if it seems like she’s not over her past relationship, then your new relationship is going nowhere and you need to deal with that like an adult. btw the guy has the night time ex girlfriend and day time new one, to me he is sleeping with both, in different times, that is why he doesn’t want the women’s to know each other. so, you try to play it really cool, all the while you’re thinking to yourself, “i'm not friends with any of my exes. – you don’t know anything about this guy either and you are making a lot of assumptions yourself. i would get everybody together for dinner and sit face to face with the man who once put his penis inside my girl. tv star bethenny frankel is the latest celeb to speak out about the situation: she's still sharing her new york city apartment with estranged husband jason hoppy, though the pair are getting a divorce. this is not an exercise of blame, but rather of discovery. you break up with him because the behaviors he’s exhibiting are making you feel suspicious. by posting here, you are permitting philadelphia magazine and metro corp. and last night, when he made a comment “i wish i have a key to your house,” i said, there is a key under the doormat.  i also understand respecting the ex’s feelings and not flaunting his new love in front of her. at what point are we allowed to take charge of our own lives, do what we need to do to get to the bottom of it (even if that means snooping or following them), to arm ourselves with enough information to make an educated decision about whether to stay or leave? i would hang back if i was her and be cautious, don’t invest too much in this guy until there is clarity about the ex and how much he wants his new girl in his life. if he was dating this girl for years, they move in together, break-up, and a few months later he is dating again, would he be a nice guy you’d want to date if he kicked her out?, adult men (and women) give unconditionally, without expectation of return. since she was the mother of his child and he would rather his kid stay in the city they lived in than have her move 2 hours away back with her parents until she had the funds for another down payment. agree with the comments that i don’t think he owes his ex anything emotional at this point, but maybe he is being a good guy by trying to protect her feelings, esp if he is the one who broke up with her. so my next guy will have to have a healthy relationship with money. fast-forward to now: they’re still living in the same house. so it isn’t just that her boyfriend is helping his ex out financially, it’s that he is still trying to protect her on an emotional level, perhaps at amy’s expense. are you going to accuse her of having a bad picker, too? next day, full of marital confidence, i stood on the school playground for pickup and, as seems to be required in such circumstances, chatted about what was going on around town. you are showing an incredible generosity of spirit here that i wish more of us shared. what exactly do i need to do to “prove” to you that i’m not a serial killer, liar, player, or sociopath.!) and therefore intimate, and the continued cohabitation creates some fuzzy boundaries. few days after soccer, i saw kristen in the deli at wegmans and beelined my cart over to hers. of course it’s inconvenient when a partner has a prominent ex.   if they have both moved on, there should be no foundation for offensiveness. no physical harm was done to me but it was a traumatic situation and there's emotional pain. think what the op amy is asking is really is there a future with this guy and can she trust him? that’s right because he has not even mentioned her. i used to be a young, naïve, trusting individual who went through life thinking “it might happen to others, but my boyfriend would never cheat on me!, the ex-gf has been living in the apartment for 10+ months. on the mom’s weekends off, the dad’s girlfriend sleeps over.